THE UPSIDE-DOWN WISDOM OF THE GOSPEL

 ...the Sermon on the Mount and especially the Beatitudes are a set of descriptions of a free life. ... As long as some people hold on to the upside-down wisdom of the gospel, it will be enough to flavor the whole meal of life. -- Fr Richard Rohr

Oh, the joy! To read  the upside-down wisdom of the gospel written by a religious authority whom I trust, is another pearl beyond price. 

It has been a long time since I first realized that the other side of material mind was spiritual mind...ergo, change our mind.

Actually, what else is the Sermon on the Mount but the upside-down wisdom of the gospel? Anything that is all about blessing the poor in spirit, those who mourn, etc., for theirs is the kingdom of heaven, has found another level of perceiving life on this earth.

That is the level I was blessed with wanting...and in this case wanting was enough. I found acceptance of what is, which I did not know a lick about, and now live there the majority of the time.

I am in the midst of a seriously painful back problem...I am reminded of the straw that broke the camel's back, and I do not doubt I have a hidden resentment (the straw) that is working its way out. 

I have no conscious thought as to its name; I have faith that God's already fixed it. I go to PT tomorrow to aid in bringing my mind and my faith together.

Thank you.

THE GIFT OF UNKNOWING, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of December 31, 2015.]

The more we know the more we know we don't know...reasoning mind weeps, Spirit exults.

Thank you. 

THE PEACE OF MIND IN BEING 90...HUH?

My sister is 90 today. 

I remember when Mom turned 90...she was so mystified/rattled, and I just thought "ho-hum." Today, with my sister turning 90, I know Mom's feelings. I am right behind my sister by only 4 years which will go by like a gasp for air. 

Ah, let the years come and go...at this point, sincerely, Thy Will, Thy Way...and thank You. 

It is a given that anytime we can honestly say, without any qualifiers, Thy Will, Thy Way, we've achieved another freebie for our peace of mind.  

Thank you.

A PRAYER FOR ALL, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of December 19, 2015.]

"Today may there be peace within. May you trust that you are exactly where you are meant to be. May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith in yourself and others. May you use the gifts that you have received and pass on the love that has been given to you. May you be content with yourself just the way you are. Let this knowledge settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of us." -- Author unknown to me

Thank you.

ON WALKING THROUGH FEAR IN FAITH, I

[The following is a slightly edited reprint of my post of December 29, 2019.}

Blinding flash of the obvious (as I asked to be relieved of the bondage of self): I must release You from my bondage of self...from my personalized idea of You?

It was a great gettin' up morning when I realized that for myself, fear is God in camouflage for nothing turns me to God faster than fear.

The hook, however, is that fear is not lifted. We must walk through our personal fear to God. Ah, but we do not resist the fear as we are walking through for He goes before us making the crooked places straight.

It is I; be not afraid. - John 6:20

Thank you.

FEELINGS ARE NOT FACTS...GOD IS THE PROOF

Blinding flash of the obvious: When feelings run amok, facts do not matter.

Ah, but we cannot stay there...we must try with a will or fall by the wayside.

Father, hear our prayer, thank You.

Thank you.

THE THIEF WAITING BY THE SIDE OF THE ROAD, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of December 25, 2014.]

The thief waiting by the side of the road in order to steal all our worldly goods? That thief is ego. The worldly goods? Those are self-determined add-ons. They begin with fear...namely, fear of losing all our worldly goods.

I am reminded: My gifts are not of this world...be of good cheer I have overcome this world.

I want to remember that it seems every time I hear of or read about a better or deeper or easier or harder Way, I immediately KNOW I am (and have been all along) doing it wrong, and I need to try this other Way.

What I really need to remember is that that is the thief waiting by the side of the road.

Thank you.

ON TAKING A LEAP OF FAITH...JUST DO IT

To pray is to practice that posture of radical trust in God’s grace—and to participate in perhaps the most radical movement of all, which is the movement of God’s Love. --Richard Rohr, Daily Meditation, November 6, 2024 

Looking back to the morning of November 6th, to the re-election of Mr. Trump to the presidency, I realize the words To pray is to practice that posture of radical trust in God’s grace mean more than I could wholly comprehend. 

Who's kidding whom? I am still a little loose in the instep with the concept much less the words.

Speaking entirely in general, I believe, I do believe, yes indeedy. 

However, and that is a rather large however, speaking specifically about me practicing that posture of radical trust in God's grace in re Donald J. Trump...much less as president of the United States of America...well enough said. Admittedly, a considerable part of my today's animus is in relation to what he has already shown as president-elect. 

Father, forgive me, help me, hear my prayer...I am living in the wreckage of the future as I foresee it...the need is not for DJT, but for SFC, i.e., me.

Who is most in need of God's radical grace right now? The person who does not seem to have a clue about spiritual growth, or the person who practices still more spiritual growth daily and comes up judgy, snarky and entirely unrepentant? Asked and answered...thank You.

It is not Lord, hear my prayer, it is Self, your prayers have been answered, now do the answer: God's will, God's way. 

Comes now spiritual growth to my rescue: Hold your nose and take a leap of faith. Thank You.

Thank you.

A CHANGE OF CONSCIOUSNESS...PEACED, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of December 23, 2023...an annual tradition?]

As the thought crossed my mind recently that a natural part of aging is forgetfulness, a blinding flash of the obvious followed: Dementia may be just a change of consciousness.

I welcomed that thought and turned from my reasoning mind to let it perc. Slowly, it has come to me that when we depend on Big Pharma and the medical profession, our consciousness is lowered, and fear blocks our Father within. When we depend on the Father, growth in consciousness and love blocks fear, and we are peaced.

I have become leery of the overwhelmingly many things that today's world credits to dementia. In the early '80s there was a run on cancer being the go-to fear...and, like dementia, cancer is fearsome. But one day I was talking with a friend about our shampoos...I named mine, and she, aghast, said, "That causes cancer...I read it in blahblahblah." That's precisely when I quit taking notice of what all was said to be causing cancer.

I see that in dementia today. It seems there is always a product being sold that gives relief...doesn't cure, just gives relief. Meditation frees us of our fear that blocks relief.

Relying on the Father within, we live assured that whatever...dementia included...comes to us, the Father is with us. He doesn't cure, he doesn't bankroll, he doesn't deliver love with a wedding cake...he gives us peace, or growth in consciousness and love in the midst of pain, lack and scorn.

We can live with that...peaced.

Thank you.

WE MUST GO DEEPER TO BE LIFTED HIGHER

We are given permission to become intimate with our own experiences, learn from them, and allow ourselves to descend to the depth of things, even our mistakes, before we try too quickly to transcend it all in the name of some idealized purity or superiority. God hides in the depths—even the depths of our sins—and is not seen as long as we stay on the surface of anything. -- Fr Richard Rohr, Daily Meditation, December 22, 2024

 That may be the most brilliant thing I've ever read.  

I've read it more than once and only with this last reading did that occur to me...I just read it again and wonder why it seemed so brilliant. That's enough to tell me I need to stay with it...it seems to be speaking in tongues, but it is speaking to me!

To descend to the depth of things, i.e., our own experiences, our own mistakes, is to crash and burn. We are the life-lesson proving our personal crash and burn is essential for God to lift us to our rightful place.

To try too quickly to transcend, suffering the learning of our life-lesson is staying stuck in self-determined objectives, the circular road back to self-centered fear.

God hides in the depths—even the depths of our sins—and is not seen as long as we stay on the surface of anything. Staying on the surface is stuck in self...there is no growth there, spiritual or otherwise...stuck is stuck, not moving anywhere. 

We must lose all hope...all hope of healing our wounded self. The conundrum is we cannot self-determine how we lose all hope, even as we know we are hoping for our idea of the help we need. We may even be right, yet that "right" too must fall by the wayside. 

That is the beginning of the crash and burn that leads us home. Only a deflated ego can be lifted out of self-limiting wants. A deflated ego...ah, the depths where God hides...the reasoning mind is not capable of thinking us there.

Go beneath the surface, descend to the depth of things...God hides in the depths. 

 

We must go beyond reason to love. -- Thaddeus Golas

Thank you. 

MORE...ANY YET MORE...WILL BE REVEALED

Blinding flash of the obvious: My fear is not of being left all alone, it is of not being left all alone.

Ah, I have built my fortress around the lone me. 

It is clear to me that my Father within knew that and through his holy Way has been my gratefully suspected guide ever since.

It is equally clear that more will be revealed...has already birthed within me and will show forth in God's good time.

This is the opening of my eyes at a higher level, deeper...God's will, God's way. Still, yet, again.

Sit and wait on the Lord. - Psalm 37:7

Thank you. 

AWAKENING UNAWARE...AWAKENED...AWARE

My early morning blinding flash of the obvious: My confused, conflicted, upside-down feelings are my birthing fears...feelings that are opening me to the Father within.... my unknown, forgotten, scared feelings are of God...what I am experiencing is right ... I am at the never-before-been place. This is Let. It. Be. Thank you.

Immediately after those thought, I read Fr Richard's Daily Meditation:  Moments of spontaneous meditative experience can be understood as flash points of awareness as the person we are breaks forth into human consciousness [my blinding flash of the obvious]. ***** In moments of meditative awakening we obscurely sense that who we are and who God is is, in some inscrutable manner, one mystery. 

Questions answered, thoughts foretold, fears allayed (to come again, to be allayed again)...God is so good to me. God is so good. 

Thank you.

ON BECOMING UNSELFED...LIGHTEN UP

Seek not to know, unknowing is the path ... this may be the process of becoming unselfed...

Seeking not to know was a long-ago blinding flash of the obvious which I still wrestle with on occasion. The hard lesson learning is that the process of becoming unselfed is purely of God...trying to unknow is a self-determined objective and to wrestle with is the paradox. 

It's the old try with a will or fall by the wayside vs. let go and let God. The secret: Only still more spiritual growth makes that an unanswerable gift. 

Admittedly, the reasoning mind will often wrestle just because it chooses, and the spiritualized mind goes along just for giggles.

No doubt, I've learned more from going along for giggles than I have by self-determined seeking. Going along for the fun of it is a sign that I'm not taking myself too seriously...but self-seeking? That's an often-necessary side trip, but ego is invariably present albeit well-disguised. Beware.

Rule of thumb: The more spiritual it seems to the reasoning mind, the closer to an ego-trip we're walking. 

Trust God, serve others, love and laugh...and don't take our self so seriously.

Thank you.

ACHIEVE NOTHING, RECEIVE EVERYTHING

All we need remember is the promise: 'Be not afraid...it is I.'

What if that is true? That, literally, all we need remember is the promise: 'Be not afraid...it is I.' 

Remembering is the promise, but the doing is the hard part...the be not afraid part...doing that is the stone we need to roll away. Doing it by believing it. Believing it by living it. Living it...what would that look like? 

Say, fear comes creeping into our consciousness, would we immediately turn our fear thoughts to God, not with an abject please-prayer, but with a grateful thank you-prayer? And we would need to mean it. 

We have learned to pray thank you almost continuously, even when anxiety comes around, but we've never imagined in the moment, our anxiety wearing the Robe. There be the rub.

Oh wait...this is a blinding flash of the obvious! This is God-gifted for our spiritual growth. 

This be our 2025 walking orders...when, not if, fear comes calling, to pray thank you gratefully. To honestly welcome the fear for our spiritual sustenance...continuing to prove more deeply that nothing turns us to God faster than fear.

Having no idea where to start, we can know we're on the right road for just this morning, Fr Richard's Daily Meditation promised the answer: This is something we can only fall into and receive—and nothing that we can achieve, which utterly humiliates the ego, the willful, and all overachievers.

God loves us so much.

Thank you.

SAY YES IN TRUST THOUGH WE CANNOT SEE

Anglican hermit Maggie Ross:  ...say yes, as Jesus said yes to the cup that did not pass from him. -- Richard Rohr's Daily Meditation, December 16, 2024

These, my fear-full days, are personally essential. They draw me ever closer to God...to God's will, God's way in my life today, Now. They fulfill the gift I have been given that continues to lift me into still more spiritual growth. 

God Calling today: Joy is the reward of patiently seeing Me in the dull, dark days of trusting when you cannot see.

Again, still, always and all ways, we say yes as the Lord reveals that He has us in the palm of his hand. 

Thank you.

NOTHING TURNS US TO GOD FASTER THAN FEAR

...many people who are not at all correct are the most connected by reason of their intense need and desire. -- Fr Richard Rohr, Daily Meditation, December 15, 2024

There's a comfort. 

I doubt I am "not at all correct" but I am aware I am not the most correct person on my block...or in my life...and I'm good with that. That fact alone keeps me coming back...loving and laughing the majority of the time.

My fear of dementia is riding me hard this morning...note, it is my fear of dementia. I welcome that fear just as I learned to welcome anxiety since fear is just upgraded anxiety. 

I am aware and I welcome the fact that my welcoming will not take dementia away, if that be God's will for me. It will, however, let me live in peace with it just as I do not fear my anxiety today. When I feel anxious, I turn within to the God of my understanding, which stands tall in proof that love defangs fear. Is it any wonder that nothing turns me to God faster than fear! 

God lives within us, for us...fear happens to be my vehicle to the Presence. My long-ago BFO telling me to turn to God p.d.q. is my working truth, and I love it.

Fr Richard's quote is proof that God is guiding me always and all ways. The Father knows my needs and that is just what I needed to calm my jangled nerves this morning. God loves me so much.

Thank you.

LINGER NOT...PRAY THANK YOU AND MOVE ON

 Like Mary giving her fiat ('let it be done') and finding her limited view of God blown open, we too are invited to give permission to the Spirit to shake up everything we thought we knew.  -- Shannon K. Evans, Daily Meditation, December 14, 2024

It was Mary's "fiat" that gave me the idea to say virtually the same thing to the God of my understanding. 

My words, Knock Yourself out, Lord...do unto me whatever needs be done. I would rather have Your will done in my life than my will no matter what it looks like to my reasoning mind's eye.

I do not recall how long ago I asked that, but it has made all the difference in my walking around world. Whatever comes to me, I silently say thank You which acknowledges I'm good with whatever comes. 

That's what I am living now with my "dementia" trepidation...if that be God's will, God's way, I welcome it. 

Mostly, I don't linger trying to make good whatever comes...when I catch myself dickering with it, I remind me to let it be what it needs be. And remember once again, wants are of self, needs are of God.

I admit I am still hoping that dementia is not God's will for me, and I'm comfortable with "hoping" being God's job in keeping me on the straight and narrow.

Thank you.

WORST FEAR COME TRUE? PEARL BEYOND PRICE!

To spiritually know things on a deeper level, ***** we’ll know that Someone Else is doing the knowing through us. God is no longer 'out there.' At this point, it’s not like one has a new relationship with God; it’s like one has a whole new God! -- Fr Richard Rohr, Daily Meditation, December 13, 2024

I read Fr Richard this morning, and I melted...I knew and I knew I knew and have known that for some time, and always for our well-being.

Comes now a blinding flash of the obvious: God may be holding dementia for me...that may be God's will, God's way for me.

I saw how I keep trying to sway God away from dementia so that I have no mental problems...that my mind be sharp, all clear. 

Then I recall that was my earnest desire with regard to my original incurable, progressive disease...

which now that I've lived with it for over 50 years, I know it to be my personal pearl. Clearly, I pray for God's will, God's way while secretly resisting anything but my will, my way.

This morning, I got a whisper that dementia may be what I already have...which birthed the rest of the BFO: If so, that, too, is for my benefit, and I welcome it. 

Ah, the blessed relief.

Now I need to go to the doctor for a medical diagnosis. If I am found to have a sharp and clear mind for a person 80+, am I relieved or ready to go through the fear again...when, not if, old-age forgetfulness comes on stronger, waving its fear-flag of dementia? 

The reasoning mind knows no quit, does it? But neither does God, neither does God...which is precisely how we build trust. It's all good.

Thank you. 

THE DARK NIGHT OF MY SOUL

It is shortly after 5:00 AM, and I am feeling sick with fear of dementia...of losing my mind.

I just awoke unable to remember...period...not even how to turn on the TV. 

I am just now remembering this is how my anxiety works me...remembering that does not relieve it.

I have talked me through it and got the morning news on my TV, but my belly is butterfried. I am feeling fear right this minute.

Ah, comes the quiet word: I need to welcome fear...hug it and kiss it and let it be. Then do the next thing that I need to do. First, my quiet time and then get busy with my dailies. 

My belly still burns...it's the afterburn of anxiety. Thank You, Jesus.

Later another wave: I realize I am experiencing the dark night of my soul. I feel gutbucket fear. I know no one to talk with...I am all alone...I repeat Jesus repeatedly, but I feel nada...just fear and a burning belly. 

Lord, hear my prayer...thank You. I repeat...repeatedly.

I say to myself, and I believe it I hope...this is me crashing and burning. This is the necessary crash and burn from which I must leave nothing but ashes...no hope, no idea of lifting me up; hopeless, helpless, fearful, without a single hope of help...mostly afraid that I am doubting the Lord.

I do not need outside help...I need the Father within...or is that just another self-determined objective that is standing in the way of my utter defeat? 

My belly burns, I feel no hope, just a darkness in my chest...this is the dark night of my soul...I cannot force my way out of this. My brain knowing this is the Way, the Way of the Lord...crash and burn to rise again...feels like useless information as I sit in the middle of it. 

Thy will, Thy way...Lord, help me my unbelief. Thank You.

Thank you.

GOD IS PATIENT...THANK GOD!

Be it done to me, oh Lord, according to Thy will. -- Mary's Obligate

[Note: Purely as background for my today's post, I am neither Catholic nor am I church people...I live a simple life with the God of my understanding.]

The Mary quote came to me this morning...I cannot find anything that I was reading at the time that this would have come from...especially the words Mary's Obligate. I have no knowledge or memory of the very word "obligate" much less Mary's Obligate.

But I did see it in my mind's eye along with the rest of the quote. 

I had been sitting in silence with my thoughts trained on accepting God's will, God's way, particularly, dementia if that be God's will for me. 

Mary when she accepted God's word did or must have passed my mind for then came, Be it done to me, oh Lord, according to Thy will. -- Mary's Obligate.

I felt nothing, got neither warm nor scared feelings...did not even ponder it at the time. After my quiet time, I recalled the words of "Mary's Obligate," and I had to google it. I felt poleaxed

So, now that I've pondered it by writing it down, I'm looking for the message's marching orders for me. It is to laugh...when will I ever learn? 

Thy will be done means I do not know yet but whatever, whenever works for me. Or, figure out nothing, let what is coming, come, pray thank You, and continue to trust.

God is so good to me...patient may be the better word.

Thank you.

LIFE: CIRCLES AND CYCLES LIVED IN TRUST

I found a post of mine from December 24, 2021, in which I pontificated about coming to believe: We cannot come to believe utterly until we can come to trust utterly the God of our own understanding. To trust that very God can, will and does intervene in our life in our behalf.

As I read that this morning, I flashed on a missing link in my certitude in coming to believe: When and only when reasoning mind doubts, questions...ah, despairs...only then does belief be gifted to us. Doubtless, it takes the rest of our time on this earth, questioning and unquestioning, to trust that. 

Ah, comes the recognition, the realization, that what was posted on December 24, 2021, was indeed the truth that can only be lived within the invisible universal goodness of God. 

Life is circles and cycles...live trusting It and have a ball.

Thank you.

UNEXPLAINABLE...UNREASONABLE...OF GOD

[T]he beginning levels of our consciousness are dualistic, while the later or deeper levels are non-dual and unitive. The only way to move from stage to stage is basically by some form of wounding, failure, or darkness. -- Fr Richard Rohr, Daily Meditation, June 20, 2024

We can only know that for Truth by experiencing it, by walking through the wounding, the failure, the darkness, and coming out the other side changed...upgraded, bettered...within.

Imagine my surprise when I learned...when I experienced...coming out the other side is not a one-time journey. 

We come out the other side of our today's drama and trauma and feel changed...we are changed. But not permanently. The minute we hunker down in our changed consciousness, with the idea that Now we've got it, Now we are safe, secure, all set...that's the minute our mind begins to be changed...whether we know it or not, and usually not.

That is entry level into higher consciousness...there is no one seat at the table. Just as the more comfortable the seat we find, the surer we need to get a move on. 

This for me was the beginning of my living realization that some form of wounding, failure, or darkness is essential for our mind to be changed. From feeling untroubled, at peace...right in a word...to no longer afraid as such but not dreading. No longer seeking my will, my way, but without thought, praying thank you for God's will, God's way. In that moment...when it appears so un, just un...right there. Another of God's hidey-holes. 

Unexplainable. No need to try. Don't even want to. Just grateful. Accepting. Blessed.

Thank you.

A TRINITY: LOVE, LAUGHTER AND THANK YOU

My note on this day in my daily reader, God Calling: '22 Faith is nonresistance.

I wondered as I read that if nonresistance is acceptance, or if they are just intertwined? Then again, does it matter? For the fact is we need to live in faith, nonresistant, accepting.

We need to live there not from the reasoning mind plane for that is a self-determined objective, but from the plane of higher consciousness...where wrong (so-called evil) meets God and is...tamed? turned? upgraded? Devolved! 

I recall my long-ago BFO: Upgrade your attitude, and you upgrade your problem. There...a long-ago memory assuring me that God is still calling.

Thank you is faith, is nonresistance, is acceptance, is love, is God. When reasoning mind, our material world, meets fear, which is a this-life mental state, we need only pray thank you...and love and laugh. 

Thank you, love and laughter are always earning their keep.

Thank you.

AWAY FROM SELF...TOWARD GOD

 As Ilia Delio wrote in her poem The Christic,  We are trying too hard to find You, but You are already here....

Doesn't that say it all? 

Does that stay our continuing to "try too hard?" Of course not. "Trying to find you" is my version of walking in faith. "Trying too hard," according to me, is simply trying...trying to make conscious contact with the God of our understanding when we're doing it right.

My hard-earned belief is that we must try with a will or fall by the wayside to get to the realization that too often trying is a self-determined objective that blocks the perfect objective which is of God. 

Long ago I read then wrote about spiritual growth going in circles and cycles and there's my proof. When I first read the Sermon on the Mount and "got it," that is the glimmer of gold that I "got." I only love it.

Since then, that glimmer has been growing smaller, moving me backward, raising more questions...which is It, i.e., away from self, toward God. 

We are trying too hard to find You, but You are already here.... Yes! And long may we try.

Thank you.

SACRED DISCONTENT IS OUR GOD CONNECTION

Teilhard de Chardin in Cosmic Life said, 'To live the cosmic life is to live dominated by the consciousness that one is an atom in the body of the mystical and cosmic Christ.'

Geez, here's me wanting to live "the cosmic life"...hoping I may be already. Unknowingly, I may be! But, we, the entire universe, unknowingly may be living the cosmic life. 

Unknowingly...the spiritual pearl and also an apt description for reasoning mind.

In taking particular note of two words in the Teilhard quote, namely, "to live," we are blessed by the realization that "to know," "to realize," "to believe" do not even touch "to live." We have "known, realized, believed" for some time now...ah, but lived? No, we really have not. 

That is to say, I have not knowingly lived and breathed being an atom in the body of Christ. On my finer days...no, better moments, in my quiet time, I may have. I have wanted to...longed to...even have felt a bit of a connection, a nudge so to speak. I am comforted in knowing that is close enough for me for where I am in my world today...close enough by heading in the right direction.

I am comfortable with that but not, repeat not, content with that. It is the sacred discontent... the uncontent...that is our gold, our God connection, or God-gift, akin to unknowing being the goal we seek, whether we know it or not.

The difference between living a worried life and living with sacred discontent is worried is entirely selfed or self-centered, discontent is God centered...or, selfed free.

Discontent...the pearl beyond price. Who knew? 

Thank you.

HUMILITY IS HARD TO LOVE...LOVE HARDER

 Blinding flash of the obvious: I need to commit to the spiritual fact that raised consciousness is for our good when it feels not so good.

That's a tough one since I wonder whether my raised consciousness isn't the driver of my anxiety, my fears...fear of dementia being today's blue-plate special. 

I once believed that raised consciousness made experiencing life easier...softer. Well, NO. It makes clear that crucifixion is crucifixion. There is no comfy crucifixion, there is Glory in crucifixion. (Uh, the glory part is from belief as opposed to actual experience.)

My crucifixion equivalent today...paltry though it be...is the package of self-stuff, i.e., $1,300 physical therapy bill, Honda recall, car repairs, injured leg and foot. All one for my benefit...for me to walk through feeling...realizing...the love of God in me is in this guiding light I am following. 

There is no creature comfort enlightenment...the comfort is in meeting life's glitches on their terms, kissing them on the lips to be moved on up deeper Thy will, Thy way.

The Father alive in me is me doing what I do in reliance on the God of my understanding and accepting that as my best in and at that moment. That often looks right shabby to my reasoning mind's eyes, but shabby is God's perfect will for me in that moment.

Shabby, thy name is humility.

Thank you.

FOR THE BENEFIT OF OTHERS...AND ME

Ideas floating around: Use it or lose it has popped up uninvited...ah, but right on time. I'm thinking of the "mature" folks now...those of us in our later years. The following thoughts began with a fear of dementia and how that fear seems to be silently proliferating. Many, if not most, of my older friends hesitate to mention it...a dead giveaway, and I speak from experience. 

The question is, why is dementia proliferating...in what seems like double-time? Personally, I believe it is due to our not being required to use our brain so much today. The many conveniences that we are offered today preclude the necessity of using our brain.  

A couple of for instances: I have a new lamp which turns on and off practically on its own. Tap, it is on.. tap again, it is off. There's a hand warmer that heats up on its own...it judges body temp all by itself! I can tell my TV what I want to see, and it delivers.

Then there's my experience with my 2025 Civic...a nice car but certainly one of the lesser money-wise. It has more bells and whistles than any one person could possibly need. But all of its conveniences led to the use it or lose it thought.  I've had the Civic since the end of September...less than three full months...and already I have damaged the entire right side. Be it known...I have never ever had a driving accident, big or little, until this one. Yes, I do suspect my lazy brain...now being afraid it is dementia.  

There is nothing wrong with any of these, per se...but where's the mental effort? Where's the attention we need to pay, the necessity for use it or lose it, when the "it" is our brain? 

For a while now, several friends and I have committed to a three-minute meditation at or about 8:00 AM every day. We use: For America, Thy will be done and then sit with whatever God speaks through each of us for America.  

My intention now is to find another meditation-exercise to do for the benefit of my older friends...and me. 

Thank you.  

TO NOT KNOW...THERE BE THE PEARL

On this day in 2003, I first wrote in my Easwaran daily of my realization of my living in higher consciousness. That is 21 years that I have been silently growing within me without full realization, i.e. reasoning mind awareness. 

Apparently, we can live in higher consciousness with all our rues, regrets and remorses only reasoning mind facts. I believe they are God's will, God's way for our benefit. 

More and more, I am coming to understand and accept that not knowing is our pearl. 

To the reasoning mind, knowing is essential...it may be that knowing is purely of the material world...not knowing is living in the Now, making mistakes in order to be corrected...raised higher where down is up, etc., et al.

Are these reasoning mind considerations? Necessary to drop into the cauldron of consciousness for purification, to be borne out...like 21 years later to the reasoning mind...Now to the God of our own understanding.

The unknown...God's will, God's way to lead us higher, deeper.

Thank you.

THE TIME OF TRUMP FORETOLD, !

[The following is a reprint of my post of December 12, 2015]

My joy is gone, grief is upon me,

my heart is sick.

Hark, the cry of my poor people

from far and wide in the land:

'Is the Lord not in Zion?'

—Jeremiah 8:18-19

The time of Trump foretold...or, by the prickling of my thumbs, something wicked this way comes.

On the other hand...and there is always another hand...there can never be just one side of a coin or a story. The flip side of the time of Trump then is: This is the time the Lord has made. Let us relax and be happy in it. [My paraphrase.]

There is nothing outside the realm of our Lord...what takes place within the realm is ours to perfect by finding our Lord there.

Thank you.

WE GO TO GOD FOR GOD AND THAT IS ALL

If, as I believe, we are evolving inward and upward then we must walk through the material-mind dregs we experience...say, a 3:00 AM terrorizing fear of what may be just around the corner of our mind. Pray thank you. 

We cannot go for higher consciousness in order to avoid feeling fear. We go to God for God and that is all, a BFO from many years ago.

We must experience...our spiritual growth needs that we experience...the grinding and gnashing of the material mind's teeth...to feel the worst that reason has to offer so we can experience its nonpower.

Experiencing "the dark night of the soul" was doubtless a forerunner of what we will know, try to escape from, get to welcome...all that the material world has to throw at God and God's world. 

We think but cannot yet know that this is already living in our consciousness...higher at a deeper level. We can realize it only as we experience it...Here and Now.

Thank you.

GOD AND I HAVE MET THIS FEAR & CAN AGAIN

God looks for us when our lostness is so convoluted and so profound, we can’t even pretend to look for God. But even in such bleak and hopeless places, God finds us. This is amazing grace. And it is ours. —Debie Thomas, Daily Meditation, November 30, 2024 

That describes me this morning at my 3:00 dark night of my soul... deciding/questioning/ deciding/ questioning..."go to VHC ER later? Stay home to pray and meditate?" 

At 5:40 AM I read today's God Calling...talk about a direct answer: 

The Eternal God is thy refuge. - Deut. xxxiii.27: A place to flee to, a sanctuary. An escape...from yourself....from yourself whither can you flee? To the Eternal God your refuge. *** Till in His immensity you forget your...limitations. *** Till the relief of safety merges into Joy...of your refuge, and you absorb the Divine and absorbing gain strength to conquer.

That IS a direct answer from Almighty God. 

Yet my next thought is, I believe, oh Lord, help me my unbelief. 

It isn't that I don't believe, it is that I fear my own belief. "Is it odd or is it God?" plays with my mind. 

There's my problem...I dare not allow the God of my understanding to be all I need. I want it, I want that, but I fear that is me trying to take the easy way out.

Easy? Easy way out? Whoa! 

Going to ER, getting all manner of medical-material help is good, or not bad, helpful even, but that is just staying with the reasoning-mind way, when I know I need to trust God's will, God's way.

I have made the turn and now need to step out in my belief.

I know that the heart-pounding anxiety can come again...what then? Lord, hear my prayer, Thank You. 

I trust our Father's lead Now, and I follow. 

Thank you. 

THANK YOU IS THE COSMIC LINK, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of November 28, 2017.]

Life is comprised of "Uh-ohs" and "Oh wows!" (Not to mention, "Ho-hums.")

It's the uh-ohs in life that turn out to be our pearls...they are what teach us to view down as up. When what we're perceiving looks less than wonderful and has a hurt about it that causes us pause, we come to inside-know, this, too, is of God.

Our problem in getting through these storms with our God-belief intact is that we tend to hold to our belief in our own idea of what God needs to do in order for our perceived problem to be fixed.

When we hold to our idea of what fixing our problem means, self-convinced our want must be "God's will," our worst fear often comes true, i.e., we don't get our want. So we give up believing in God.

To believe as we breathe in a loving God who can and will intervene in our life on our behalf is to, first, stay focused on Now which is perfect Now; second, accept whatever is appearing as God's will for us; third, do our best with what we are given...and our best is a heartfelt "thank you." Good or not so good, our thank you will suffice.

Ah, and there's our gift: Our thank you is the cosmic link to that which goes before us to make the crooked places straight.

Thank you.

GOD HAS US IN THE PALM OF HIS HAND

With God all things are possible. -- Matthew 19:26

As I was in my quiet time this morning, the thought flashed that through conscious contact with the Father within, God, it is possible to have Lewy Body Dementia and not show it at all, not be aware of it at all. 

I recall reading about this happening a while back. Not the conscious contact with God part but the not knowing or showing it part was proved through an autopsy of a person who it was discovered had had dementia and showed no signs of it in their walking-around life.

I do not recall if it was Lewy Body but I try not to be overly scrupulous. Face it, scrupulosity is just nit-picking in fancy dress.

Actually, I'm thinking this is the proof positive we get that assures us God is on the field, has our back...the proof positive being our peace'd mind. 

It is not freedom from dementia or from any other fear we may have...that which we fear may be the fact we need to walk through to get to our Father within. It is the peace of mind we get while we walk our path that is of God.

Do your thing, fear! God has us in the palm of his hand, and I am grateful on this Thanksgiving Day of 2024.

Thank you.

TO OFFER A HEART GIFT IS LOVE

Blinding flash of the obvious: To offer love costs me nothing and makes the other richer.

To offer may be the first step in showing love. Without thought, to offer a helping hand, forgiveness, a silent prayer...a heart gift in fact. 

Sometimes the better part of common sense tells us to wait, get self out of the mix to let God's will, God's way do Its walkabout, and that's a good thing, too. That's common sense working with God for the good of all.

I had a BFO this morning that no doubt was born of my yesterday's God experience. I had plans with a friend to do Thanksgiving dinner at a nice restaurant..."had plans." I have no idea why but my friend had to cancel those plans. I received the news with no snarky thought or word...ah, but then I had time to think it over. Comes the snark...the I shoulda said, or I know what I'll say to her, etc.  

I was primed for bear as my grandma used to say. Yet when my friend called yesterday, all thought of pay-back, retribution, setting her straight was gone...I felt nothing but happy to talk with her, get on with our lives, in short. Note miracle: I did not realize it as it was happening.

Later as I was preparing for bed, it occurred to me that I hadn't "set her straight," that it had not occurred to me. I knew I was living a prime example of Material Mind vs. Spiritual Mind, and that Spiritual Mind had won this one. 

Best part...I have no lingering regrets, no afterburner thoughts...only thank you and God loves us sooo much. 

It is important for me to note (in black and white) that I had no preplanning idea of showing love...I did have more than a little preplanning thoughts about how I wanted to let her know how she had ruined my Thanksgiving, etc.  And it wasn't right. Not to mention, not fair. None of which entered my consciousness when she called, and I answered the phone...with nothing but pleased to hear from her.

Better yet...I honestly did not remember being ticked off at her until I was going to bed and an aside thought slipped in...and caused me to smile as I thanked God not only for this act of love but for the fact that it was done without thought. There's my proof positive...I am on the right track, heading in the right direction. Living God's will, God's way. 

Now to continue...slip sliding, forgetting, remembering to make my amends when, not if, I forget, etc. That's living right in the neighborhood!

Thank you.

COMES NOW FEAR...THANK YOU WELCOMES IT

I went to bed last night with an overwhelming...almost retching...fear of dementia. Of dementia being here in me now. I found release by welcoming it. While I slept, my fear of dementia became God's tool to use to lift my fear-based material mind to the higher consciousness of love-based spiritual mind. 

Welcoming with thank you really does alleviate fear...actually, raises our consciousness spiritually to the place where peace resides. Where fear is transmuted by grace. 

Meister Eckhart's quote comes to mind again: If the only prayer you ever say in your lifetime is thank you, that would suffice.

A note for me: Welcoming with thank you does not eliminate that which we fear, mine being dementia. No, if dementia is mine, my path to bring me to God consciousness, I'm good with it...at 7:00 AM. 

Also, being "good with" any dreaded possible does not mean happy about it. If it is "our cross to bear," the necessary that brings us into God consciousness, so be it for this is where the peace that passes understanding lives.

I have thought for some time now that I am at the crossover stage in consciousness...being raised into God consciousness with both my feet dragging but desire in my heart, soul, body and brain. Dementia may be my pony to ride...I might as well admit to my worse fear: Lewy Body Dementia.

Comes now a new thought: Hidden in my material mind may be worse than Lewy Body Dementia. I best quit unconsciously bargaining and welcome God's will, God's way...and Now I do.

Thank you.

ON NEEDING NOTHING BUT FAITH...THANK YOU

Matthew’s Gospel contains the parable of the wedding banquet (Matthew 22:1–14): Jesus is always undercutting what we think is common sense. This passage calls us to nondual thinking and to change our entire form of consciousness. -- Fr Richard Rohr, Daily Meditation, November 25, 2014

I wrote in my journal at 5:30 this morning: I have just read in Easwaran a new possibility...my fearful certainty of dementia may be rather my consciousness raised...'diving into the murky waters of consciousness' brought on by 'the haunting fear' that 'we may lose everything'  [specifically, my mind]. Lord, hear my prayer...Thank You...Amen.

I have a blinding flash aborning: Living in the material world with our consciousness being lifted causes fear of the unknown because it is unknown. Trust...that's how we earn trust. The unknown must be welcomed through our fear...Thy will, Thy way is always for our benefit whether we realize it or not. That's faith on the hoof. I can let dementia be a fact in my life, if that be Thy will, and not be adversely affected by it [i.e., afraid] but be blessed by it. Faith turns me ever closer to conscious contact with the God of my own understanding...ah, one'd.

An old adage: Knowing nothing, I speak freely. A new promise: Living in faith, I need nothing more.

Thank you.

ANONYMOUSLY...SPIRITUALLY...WOOF

All through the Gospels, people receive what they don’t deserve. Relentless generosity is hard for us to comprehend, much less practice. That kind of unconditional justice is beyond our human power. Yet the Gospel is showing that it’s possible *** to be fully human and divinely just, because we live in the power of the Spirit. -- Fr Richard Rohr, Daily Meditation, November 24, 2024  

Sunday 5:30 AM - Blinding flash of the obvious: What if dementia is my unconditional justice, a preordained fact of life? 

My mind has ever been my egoic safety net. Whether I knew it or not, working free from that attachment has been my spiritual gift...ah, dementia may be the cherry on top, the unconditional justice. 

The idea of forming an anonymous group of us to spiritually live with dementia may be God's will for us. We pass it on anonymously...akin to the priest with the lepers. 

I am doubly grateful to realize again God's grace in fear...fear turned my mind from the dread of dementia to the gift of dementia...joining, sharing, serving God without intention...kinda like a side bennie.  

The kicker: I don't even know if I have actual dementia or simply the fear of it...either qualify as God's unconditional justice so gratitude fits like a warm puppy feels.

Thy will, Thy way. 

Thank you.

GOD IS EVER ON THE FIELD

God isn't there to keep bad things from happening...God is here to share our fear when bad things happen.

Shared fear is how we learn God's will, God's way...God changes our mind. What our reasoning mind is perceiving as "the worst thing that could ever happen to me," God knows and shows to be His priceless gift to us. 

If the only prayer you ever say in your lifetime is thank You, that would suffice. There it is...the answer. All that comes to us comes through, from, by, with God...the response can only be thank You. 

All of this is my blinding flash of the obvious in response to my gutbucket fear that I have dementia...no, it's worse than plain dementia, it's Alzheimer's...no, it's worse still...it's Lewy Body Dementia. 

Then I read my "God Calling," the last line of today's entry being: And in My conquering Power you walk unharmed today.

God is ever on the field.

Thank you.

THE HEALER OF PAIN...LOVE AND LAUGHTER

According to me, the bane of our existence is our self-inflicted wounds...specifically, those that we put someone else's name-to-blame on. It takes a lot of still more spiritual growth (a.k.a., ego reduction in depth) to crack the protective shell around that bad habit. 

Accepting it as just a bad habit is hard for our egoic mind to grasp..."want-to" comes up short when ego enters the picture. Yet when doesn't ego enter in?  

Fact is, the minute we respond in kind and natter about the hurt...or, most often, natter about the originator of our hurt, we have a self-inflicted wound.

The good news is...and I state from experience...few things feel better than realizing our own responsibility for our hurt. 

We need to be aware that we must never "accept responsibility" before we realize it really is our responsibility. "Accepting too soon" is just another self-determined objective aiming to cut short the pain...uh-oh, resentment aborning. 

Comes the dawning...God is love and laughter, the Healer, the Comforter...All.

Thank you.

FOR AMERICA...SURVIVING THE ABYSS TOGETHER

When the unthinkable happens,
and does not relent,
we fall through our hubris
toward an inner flow,
an abiding and rebirthing darkness
that feels like home.
—Barbara Holmes, “What Is Crisis Contemplation?”

Dr. Holmes describes to a T and names what I unknowingly journaled about: crisis contemplation - "Contemplation after or during crisis is a stillness in the aftermath of a primal scream, the abyss of unknowing, and the necessity of surviving the trauma together. ..I can enter alone or with my community...we must relinquish control and seek grounding within the mystical depths of inner spaces."

The crisis, Donald J. Trump...the election...his cabinet selections, gifted me with the idea for our For America 8:00 AM, EST, three-minute meditation. 

Friends have joined me, we are inviting others to join, and we are inviting you. Please. For America.

Thank you.

THE DARK NIGHT IS THE SUN'S DELIGHT

I ponder today my oft-repeated Thaddeus Golas quote: Go beyond reason to love. With which comes the blinding flash: To go beyond reason is dementia. To the material mind, to go beyond reason gets us the thing we fear, dementia. 

Well, isn't that the all-but perfect analogy...the thing we try (self-will) to bar from our thoughts is the thing we need (God's will) to learn to love.

We're reminded of the long-ago giftee: Nothing turns us to God faster than fear...and we learn again, deeper, that no matter how true, good, blessed the promise of God with us is, fear is a knee-knocker, not to hang around with.

The promise of still more spiritual growth is peace of mind. The hard truth backing up that promise is the climb up into that growth takes some serious dread, pain, resistance...who's kidding whom? Fear. Ah, we are just beginning to experience the dark night of the soul. 

Blinding flash! That is God's will, God's way, the path that seekers have ever walked with or without material means...money, mind or sustenance.  

The dark night is the Son's delight.

Thank you.

NOT BY SELF, BY GOD, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of December 3, 2013.]

We are told the promises of God will always materialize if we work for them.

Why is it so hard to remember that the "working" for them is the "work" of maintaining conscious contact with our God? It is the work of aligning our will with Its will, of detaching from our wants (most often fear based and always of self), knowing our needs (always of God) are already met...are within us waiting to be released.

As we are released from our ego-victory wants, our needs flow forth, materializing as that which we need in that moment. And we think, "What a coincidence! I was just saying...."

The spiritual life is not a theory. We have to live it. -- Anonymous

Thank you.

OUR SEARCH FOR LOVE, OR LIFE'S MEANING

Our first need is to find within us our own meaning of love, our own definition of love. 

I read my spiritual literature and agree mentally that love is all around, is all good no matter how it appears to our reasoning mind, that love is for my benefit the same as for yours, plus for the benefit of my current nemesis...but I get no personal feeling for what that means to me. There. My Search For Life's Meaning.

I know that I am being spiritually opened which may not fully happen until three days after I am dead if then...and still I am grateful. I am grateful to know that I am on the right road in my search, that I am heading in the right direction, and I thank God. 

None of which truly eases my wondering mind...oh, BFO! That is the gift! If my wondering mind were eased, I'd be, in effect, settling for my own idea of God, God's will and God's way. 

I have found many answers for which I pray thank You and continue seeking to know God's will, God's way for me Now...right Now egoically. 

There are many universal truths that I quote by rote, that do not touch my often-nattering mind. Let's accept that for what it is...still more spiritual growth...and continue to know that God is on the field, all is right with our world.

God loves us so much.

Thank you.

FOR AMERICA...GOD'S WILL, GOD'S WAY

H.L. Mencken,
the Baltimore Evening Sun,
July 26, 1920:

'As democracy is perfected, the office of the President represents more closely the inner soul of the people. On some great and glorious day, the plain folks of the land will reach their heart’s desire at last and the White House will be occupied by a downright moron.'

That is so close to truth today that it could put fear in our gut and despair in our heart. America...she needs us now possibly more than she ever has. 

Ah, fortitude lives in our heart and our soul For America.  

Let's join together in our commitment to give God a portion of time each day For America, Thy will, Thy way. 

Thank you.

MEANDERING THOUGHTS AND LOVING THEM, I

[The following is a reprint of my blog of June 20, 2015.]

My thoughts are meandering this morning, and I remember again that in the midst of any apparent disaster or simply unwanted situation, to realize that God's hand is in it is all that is needed to bring peace.

In pondering that, it occurred to me that that realization ought to bring peace not only to me, realizing it, but to any others in the situation. But ought schmought...I cannot direct it, I can only know it. If the other is not on my spiritual wavelength...being higher or lower...s/he will miss it.

Spiritual power, however, is like water...it goes to its own level. That realization at that time may touch someone I have no knowledge of...and come as a needed blinding flash of the obvious to him or her. Maybe that's one way I get my blinding flashes of the obvious...from someone in meditation 100 miles away!

I love that image but what do I know? Just enough to know that if I'll love and laugh I won't have to analyze these things...and call it pondering.

God loves me us so much.

Thank you.

NEVER SHORT-SHEET SELF-DISCIPLINE, I

[The following is a reprint of my blog of November 18, 2016.]

Here is my servant whom I uphold, my chosen one in whom my soul delights. I have sent my spirit upon him, he will bring fair judgment to the nations.--Isaiah 42:1

I sent the above quote to a friend on the day of President Obama's first inaugural, January 20, 2009, with a note that I felt it perfectly described our new president.

My sincere prayer for myself is to upgrade my own opinion of President-elect Trump so that I can know within myself that quote perfectly describes this new president.

Achieving that upgrade is my responsibility through the grace of gratitude and God...and self-discipline.

Thank you.

P.S. Reminder for today, 11/15/24: Try with a will or fall by the wayside...plus, let go and let God. Thank you. 

STAY OUR THOUGHTS ON GOD

When people turn their thoughts to the Creator, they give the Creator power to enter their minds and bring good thoughts.  -- Tadodaho, also known as Chief Leon Shenandoah, Daily Meditations, November 14, 2024

The following are my free-floating thoughts on America's political news today:

I am caught in a maelstrom of emotions since hearing of the first of Trump's Cabinet selections...Oh No! does not begin to touch what I felt upon hearing Matt Gaetz's name for Attorney General of the United States of America. 

I've never heard of the man up for Secretary of Defense, Fox News host Pete Hegseth, but some of the reports about him are less-than wonderful...to my ears. 

Scarier yet, Tulsi Gabbard, the woman now being thought of for the position of director of national intelligence. For some time now, she has been considered a renegade based on her own behavior.

The wishful thought I had was to call my former boss, a straight-arrow retired Army Colonel, and ask him what he thinks, plans to do, is doing...I trust him, but it's been 20 years (!) since we've worked together. Trust and let the thought perc...and trust.

Based on my own experience, material and spiritual, I believe consciousness does God's work...our unformed thoughts, God's prods?, are released and bring the changes we need. Our excessively pondering them dissipates their power...our realizing them, then walking with them, is God's will, God's way.

We will of course make mistakes...that's how our consciousness continues to be raised...admitting our error opens us to the better way...there is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in.

If earthquakes, tornadoes, floods and droughts are of God, then so are, or can be, Trump and Trumpists' destructive plans for America. Curse them not, get out of their way until they run themselves out, then turn and build back better.

Again: When people turn their thoughts to the Creator, they give the Creator power to enter their minds and bring good thoughts.  -- Tadodaho, also known as Chief Leon Shenandoah

Thank you.

OUR NEED IS FOR THE BENEFIT OF ALL

I awoke this morning with either a blinding-flash or a wild-hair thought; namely, could I...should I...invite a small group of my friends to join our consciousness in a short, like three-minute, meditation, same time each day, for the benefit of America? Our one'd desire being for God's will, God's way to be done for the benefit of America today.

I do believe that President-elect Trump and his kind need to be backstopped...not by physical force but by God, i.e., the power of good...love. That force for good that birthed America and has brought us through every day yet has hit more than a bump in the road to Now. 

It seems to me that she has, we have, hit a logjam of money-mentality...money-honey, $$$$$...mostly very rich, majority white, folks with personal profit their goal who are willing to let America take the hindmost.

America to me today is akin to a good and faithful dog who has always been by our side, on our side, but is getting older and needs our help in getting up the Steps. She is of God...her need is for our benefit.

God, come to our aid for America, please and thank You.

Amen

YOU, ME AND THEM, THE LESS-THANS, ONED

We go through our lives, our years on this Earth, thinking of ourselves as separate....When we’re separate, everything becomes about protecting and defending ourselves....The whole gospel message is radical union with God, with neighbor, and even with ourselves. --  Fr Richard Rohr, Daily Meditations, November 11, 2024 

Priceless spiritual information too humanly difficult to remember (or retain?): We go to God for God and that is all.

We get all up in our head and give our self credit for understanding that is all because that is all...meaning God is all and every thought flowing from that realization is self, too often trying to bend it to our will. 

We are trying to get equal footing with God...in truth, pondering ways to bring God down, versus ways to lift us up. There it is...that sense of separate that we deny even as we seek it.

That radical union that Rohr speaks of, when realized, is the Father and I are One. The Father and I one'd... I being you, me, us, we, them, they, et al. 

Blinding flash of the obvious: I am the halt, the lame, the poor, the dirty...we are the less-thans for whom we pray as we give them a wide walk-by while speaking pretty words of love. That, too, is of God.

Thank you.

UNKNOWN QUESTIONS LEAD US

Very early this morning, from out of nowhere, these words came to me about me: renegade or mystic? 

Later, in my quiet time, I pondered what and why...I define renegade as more self than Self, and mystic as Selfed. 

I accept that the import is deep...much deeper than I know, growing deeper with every unanswered thought. Yet, I know not to stay here for to stay leads to ego-driven answers. 

This is an inner question that must answer itself in time...another path to becoming unselfed.

Seek not to know, unknowing is the true path. 

Thank you.

OVERCOME EVIL WITH GOOD

The time that I am pondering, post-election, pre-inauguration, is a gift...I am reminded to keep my thoughts stayed in today.

Nothing has physically changed in my life yet, but to me the forecast is less-than what with Trump elected president. Ah, but he is not yet president, he is president-elect. He is not scheduled to take the office of the presidency until January 20, 2025. 

Nobody knows the ways and means of the Lord tomorrow...consider Saul, meaner than a snake, on his way to Damascus, tossed off his horse and arising into a new consciousness to become Saint Paul. 

A spiritual memory: We have the experience of FDR advising America that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself. We came through that period of time God guided...a tish battered, tattered and torn but stronger than ever we dreamed we could be...with the blessed realization that nothing turns us to God faster than fear. 

There is ample time for God changes to take place within us...our choice, our job, our consciousness intact, TRUSTING God by doing for God's will, God's way. 

Trust America, our own self and the people of America to rise above the current revenge-filled $$$-grab mentality while we continue to practice God's will, God's way. This will not change the money-honey consciousness that prevails, but it will give you, me and any who want it peace of mind.

Resist not evil, overcome evil with good. 

Thank you.

GRATITUDE IS OUR ONLY ENTITLEMENT, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of December 10, 2018]

To receive miraculous healing and yet to be able to refrain from personal glory in the achievement is most difficult. All that they were entitled to was gratitude that they had been called and that the Power was working through them -- not that they had the power. The Power was working through them, but it could work through them only in proportion to their humility, and the true sense of humility is not any detraction or depreciation of one's self: it is a realization of one's greatness in having been called to be a servant of that power, which is true paradox. -- Copied from I know not where, dated 10/5/78 in my journal.

It is a personal fact that I (and most of my friends) have received miraculous healing...it is uplifting to see in black and white that which our heart knows: All that we are entitled to is gratitude that we have been called and that the Power is working through us...not that we had the power.

Thank you.

REASON BARTERS, SPIRIT WELCOMES

God’s love is infinite, a concept the human mind cannot form. The divine notion of perfection isn’t the exclusion of imperfection, but the inclusion of imperfection. That’s divine love. -- Fr Richard Rohr

I wonder if higher consciousness isn't a land of yes and that is all. 

Whatever appears to our consciousness...yes. We need note that trying to do yes before we are readied is the reasoning mind trying to get a step ahead of God, a veritable guarantee to crash and burn.

Ah, that crash and burn, too, is yes because invariably it is fear filled...and nothing turns us to God faster than fear.

Allowing our mind to open to the possibility of living in yes is where we are today. We did not realize it, of course, never having entertained such a possibility, but that feels like the foundation of all spiritual growth.

Face it, what else could resist not evil possibly mean? That which is my favorite biblical advice...not being a Bible reader, I consider those three words to be my Higher Power's special gift to me, another step out of self...resist not evil is to live in the land of yes.

That seems to be where we are now being directed...to live in the land of yes.  To rely less on material mind, i.e., reason, and more on spiritual mind, i.e., God. We learn to live unafraid of evil by not resisting evil. Reasoning mind balks, spiritual mind invites.

We are living in love if we can maintain a daily yes. That doesn’t mean we don’t recognize injustice and stand against it, but we don’t let our hearts become hardened and our minds become rigid in its judgments. Love is always a yes. -- Fr Richard 

Thank you.

FROM CLUELESS TO COMFORTED...LOVE & LAUGH

Learning to love may be the hardest task I've ever been given...to love indiscriminately without selection, protection or preference. 

I accept myself as a "rank beginner" on the spiritual ladder of life, but learning how to love openly is a whole new venture. The best I can do at the moment is to want to...I want to learn to love without qualifiers. Not him, her, them, a pet, the moon, nothing but the walking-around feelings of giving not getting as my motivator. Already I've gotten on the self-determined-objective track.

I love giving the advice, Just Do It...giving the advice to others, that is. Ah, but when I say it to me, my answer is usually HOW?  

When we are met with a what-to-do, the best we can aim for is to do something about something. The stupidest thing I ever heard when first I heard it, the pearl beyond price to me today.

I'm becoming anxiously, dubiously, foot-draggingly aware that learning how to love is all about putting the other first...or self last is The Word without the bark on it. 

Reasoning-mind simplified...just accept everything we become conscious of. There...precisely why reasoning mind gets us bupkis when it comes to love. 

The final answer is our acceptance of everything and everybody, but the first lesson is that only God can get us there...and only when we go to God for God and that is all. See? Reasoning mind just backed out...or blacked out.

I love getting all up in my head, writing it all down, coming to the conclusion that I'm right where I started...only now feeling comforted. 

From clueless to comforted by grace and by God...love and laugh.

Thank you.

PRAY FOR PEACE...THEN WALK IT

This morning upon hearing the news of the election of Donald Trump to the presidency again, Fr Richard's words, To pray is to practice that posture of radical trust in God’s grace, mean more than I can wholly comprehend in the moment.

I recall my go-to: If alcoholism can be a good thing, and it is to me today, then so can this be. 

I rest in my favorite...resist not evil (Matthew 5:39).

Blinding flash of the obvious:  If Democrats and all in agreement with them took the others out

by wile or by will, that would justify the others' need for blood in the streets. No. The Republicans, led by the consecrated memory of Abraham Lincoln, must turn around, saving themselves, the Democrats, any and all others, AND America. Resist not evil...PRAY Thank You.

I will fight no more forever -- Chief Joseph

Thank you.

TORN APART...REBORN...RECONFIGURED

Today, November 5, 2024, is Election Day in America...presidential election day, the Big One. And the word on the street and in the air and mainly in our brain is: OMG...what if S/He wins? 

One of them will win, it is the how that causes anxiety. What we forget and must re-remember: The how is God's will, God's way always and all ways.

America torn apart is my fear...and here comes God to calm my self-centered fear. The recurring thought that I trust is: That which I fear may need to happen.

My idea of America torn apart may be God's gift, i.e., the rebirth of America by the righting of Americans. It is not America that has gotten off track, it is we, we Americans, who have.  

We may need to be torn apart...that's a tish harsh...let's call it reconfigured, reborn is too evangelistic for me. All of us Americans may need to be reconfigured as God wills in God's way.

Here's when let go and let God earns its keep. We have learned that the harder we try, the harder we fall. Trust is now our handwarmer, our newest BFF. 

We trust...we seek God's will, God's way...we don't like the looks of it...we trust. Repeatedly.

God guides us every Step of the way...we realize as we look back.

Jesus woke up, rebuked the wind, and said to the sea, 'Peace! Be still!' Then the wind ceased and there was a dead calm. He said to the disciples, 'Why are you afraid? Have you still no faith?' —Mark 4:39–40 

Thank you. 

UNLOVED, UNWANTED, UNNEEDED...PEACED

 [Back story: I am not a 'Jesus person' per se. But I am a believer in Christ consciousness as delivered to us through the life of Jesus, or so it is written. I've long-since quit quibbling about that. Jesus lived, brought the quiet word that guides me today...close enough to perfect for me.]

Blinding flash: I keep praying for Jesus to "do it," whatever it is at the moment...the consciousness of Jesus is alive within me, within us, the power of Jesus is ours from birth...we squander it on self-will, self-wishes, doing nada but praying, thinking our words of prayer will incite Jesus to take care of our perceived problem. NO...that is our inborn power. The do something about something is ours to do. That is how Jesus walks among us Now...according to me.

The reasoning mind is ours to use, not to be used by...when "used by," it appears as fear and that is all..."appears." 

Reasoning mind imagines the Nobel Peace Prize as ours...spiritual mind knows un is our peace prize...unloved, unwanted, unneeded, unappreciated, our path to God, while reasoning mind can only balk at the thought...go beyond reason to love. 

My eyebrows-up knowledge eager to be realized: We have all the love there is within us right now...we can only access it by giving it away....we give it away to all the uns we meet on the street or in our mind...rejections, snubs, snarks are for our benefit...to teach us...to open our closed mind to the inborn love within us.

Go beyond reason to love - it is safe. It is the only safety. Love all you can, and when you are ready all will be shown to you. -- Thaddeus Golas, "The Lazy Man's Guide to Enlightenment"

Thank you.

SANCTIFIED, PURIFIED, LOVED

When I was a child, our family dog, a Dalmation, was named Dorothy Lamour Carter, and of course we called her Dot. I know not why, but Dot is much on my mind this morning. 

Thoughts that are pouring out: I simply ignored Dot...the folks claimed to love her so much because my brother Paul (who died way too young, age 12) loved her but they did not show(er) love...she was ignored in truth but was kept simply to prove love? (I'm guessing.) 

My heart hurts remembering how poorly she was treated by all of us...not treated physically but left alone...simply that. After Paul passed, she was virtually ignored...she was fed, housed, and left alone. 

Ah, but it is my part that is the splinter in my heart. I took no part in showing her love, giving her loving attention.

Father forgive me...I pray she has found the love she gave...thank You.

Then it came to me without plan or prethought that Old Dot was sanctified [God-given word]...our family was purified. I held my ceramic model of her and wept...I know, unthinking I know...God, love, led me.

Love, specifically, how to ... has been bouncing me along for a while, whether I knew it or not. I know this morning that I felt...no, I did not feel, I realized: 

I was love, 

I was loved, 

I AM loved, 

I AM love.

And Old Dot is sanctified.

Thank you.

ON DOING A GOD ACT WITHOUT THOUGHT

The courage we need is the courage to fail and stay. * * * * *  Every inch of progress, every ounce of love, every truly meaningful action from here on out will happen through courage, not comfort. --Prentis Hemphill, Fr Richard Rohr's Daily Meditation, November 2, 2024 

I know not why, but I awoke this morning with thoughts of courage, of all things. One thought: Courage is acting on what indwells, informs, acts subconsciously for our good...whether we know it or not. 

I suspect that courage, left to the interpretation of our reasoning mind, often warns of rues, regrets and remorses,,,fear in a word...and when heeded, hinders our spiritual growth.

Face it, courage is hard to love...by the nature of the word, it asks us to go against our ego-protected instincts...namely, save face first, pray later.

The upside of courage...the God side...is it does not need our permission to act. Looking back is when we often recognize an unselfed act of courage...speaking up for another, slipping a dollar to an unknown friend in need...that sort of thing. Acts of kindness without thought.

Blinding flash...we all have many acts of courage that only God knows of...acts that the ego could take no credit for so are not remembered. Says it all, doesn't it?..."all" being God's grace. 

To do a God act without thought of self is another feather in our angel wings.

Thank you.

WE CANNOT GO THERE ALONE

It was 26 years ago today that I again crashed and burned...gave up, gave over, gave in, and in the doing, thought that God may not know my name. Further, because God may not know my name that I had to seek help from my last chosen place for me to seek help. 

So, I did. Turns out, the last place I wanted to seek help is just another hidey-hole of God's.

Today, again I am feeling blocked. So I start anew...give up, give over, give in. The difference is that I'm not just hoping now, I'm knowing now from my own experience. I know and I know I know...when asked, God's will, God's way comes to our aid. To know unto acceptance: To our reasoning mind, it usually comes looking less-than, but invariably, i.e., spiritually, that, too, is for our benefit.  

The hook, I learn repeatedly, is not in the knowing, it is in the doing what I'm knowing that births freedom from the bondage of self. Yet, I do not know...I do hope, but I do not know...that I will do it.

Here is my today's understanding of my Rites of Initiation: First step: learning, self-accepting what I'm learning, doing that which I have learned, failing, admitting it, getting up and going again...repeatedly...until I get it right for today. 

Second step: Remembering the First Step in toto and doing it with a grin. 

Third step unto infinity: Same as the first two steps. 

OR...as Thaddeus Golas wrote in "The Lazy Man's Guide to Enlightenment": Go beyond reason to love. 

There...all the great truths ever written, wrapped up in five words: Go beyond reason to love. 

Sacred secret: We cannot go there alone...thank God. 

Thank you.

LOVE OUR ENEMY...INCLUDING THE WORD JESUS

The ancient Israelites were told 'to love your neighbor,' but Jesus takes it to the nth degree. He says, 'No—love your enemy.' -- Fr Richard Rohr, Daily Bulletin, October 30, 2024

My experience has been that the first change we must make is not in loving our enemy but in losing our resistance to our own take on the word Jesus. 

According to me, we have no inner connection with Jesus which is the Jesus we heard preached about as a child. We only have a foul feeling when we hear the word Jesus...an Oh, No...not going there...no way. 

Then we let our own idea of loving our enemy take charge, and we come up with exceptions to the rule every time. As in. yeah, but not Nazi Germany, or yeah, but not Bull Connor; and yeah, but not etc., et al. 

I admit, getting over the very word Jesus is still my mountain to climb...it's more a hill now, but it's still for me to climb. My tried-and-true Big Book comes to my aid: We must try with a will or fall by the wayside.

My inner goal is that I welcome Jesus into my head and heart as a friend who is only in it to win it for my benefit...and my benefit is always and forever for others. (And I get carried along on the wings of the Dove...face it, I love my spiritual fantasies.)

Thank you. 

FEELING LESS-THAN...CLOSE ENOUGH

I'm feeling less-than today, but less-than dressed in hope...another gift of my 80s.

There are way too many stumbling blocks in my life right now...life's what-to-do, what-to-do? Been here before, but now that the 80s have wrapped their feathers around me, I'm not feeling panicked. 

This is a fairly new space for me, for my conscious thinking...fancy way of saying I do not have a clue about anything I am facing right now.  

I hear the voice of my yesteryear friend saying, do something about something. 

That's my yesteryear friend who, at that time, I thought was a nutcase because what does do something about something even mean? My thinking, when we're faced with insurmountable problems, we need...ah, comes the light: We need to do something about something just to move us off the dime...Now. 

There. That simple thought may have been my original blinding flash of the obvious that led me to trust my friend...and God. The pearl beyond price.

I'm glad they are both in my mind's eye today...still speaking truth, i.e., keep it simple.

God is so good to me. God is so good. God is.

Thank you. 

SLOW ON THE UPTAKE? THE LORD WILL WAIT

From my journal this morning: 10/28/24 - Is my new Civic my higher-consciousness chariot? On its one-week birthday, I scraped the entire right side of the car against a wall...the same wall I drive by every day with never before a ping; then the registration was returned, filled in wrong by me; and new license plates needed to be put on by the 26th, already two days late. None of these 'events' are new to me...every year, pretty much the same thing. Yet, this year, it's as if I've not been here before. 

Blinding flash: Divinity rises out of the ashes of self-determined objectives. 

A few self-determined objectives for instance: My leasing a new car rather than trusting that I no longer need a car or possibly can no longer physically handle a car what with my eyesight fading.

I am wavering in my trust of my BFO...is it wishful thinking? or is it God's will, God's way made new in me? 

I wish I had someone here to talk all this over with...oh wait! I do! The Lord is with us within us, without us Now. Ever reminding us of the new way of thinking, feeling, doing, being. The choice is mine to believe or not to believe. 

Actually, it is not my choice...I turned my choice over to the God of my understanding some fifty years ago, and I have positive-proof evidence in my life's experience.

More will be revealed. I am reminded: More has already been revealed...I am just slow on the uptake. 

Thank you.

TWO WAYS TO SEE ONE THING, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of December 24, 2016.]

I just read an old note I wrote in my "God Calling," and it thrilled me to my toes. All I had written was, Yesterday, I gave over to John in a very small but ego-denying way. Thank you.

I made note of it because I had just started the big turn from thinking any giving over was proof I was gutless and would never be able to stand up for myself, take my own part, know and show that I'm just as good as anyone...the poor-pitiful-put-upon-me list drags on.

I'm glad I date my notes and that I made note of this because, in truth, it isn't all that old. In my mind, I've been doing this for a long, long time..."this" being giving over. And there it is...that is my ah-ha. I've given over for a long, long time, only I've just begun to realize it as God's better way and not ego's wimp-out.

This is proof again that there are two ways of looking at every one thing...through our ego's eyes and whine or through God's and bask in sunshine.

Thank you.

LORD, HEAR OUR PRAYERS

The straw that broke the camel's back. -- old adage

Billionaire Jeff Bezos, the owner of The Washington Post, using that fine newspaper to line his bank accounts, feels like the last straw, and I feel bereft. 

Lord, hear our prayers.

Thank you.

KNOW NOT HOW TO LOVE? LOVE DOES ITS THING

This period in which I find myself living, my 6s&7s daily life, I have considered to be part of my Initiation. According to my morning's flash, all life is Initiation. This is not a new thought but today it is a realization, all of life is Initiation for our spiritual benefit. 

I have come to that conclusion based on my life since October 3 when I scraped the entire side of my one-week old car. New thought, new love...God's will, God's way.

My life has appeared to be running upside-down and backwards...all the daily needles and pins working against me. All of which, by the grace of God and my new concept of love, I have met, not rigid, righteous and right, but with gratitude...and, who is kidding whom, with the proverbial crossed fingers.

Without mental gymnastics, with little rancor, i.e., resistance to the picture appearing, all daily needles and pins were met by my higher Power knowing all was for my benefit when, not if, I welcomed all with my new, barely realized, love. 

My not knowing how to do that, it was done through me...go beyond reason to love proved itself again. 

Old motto made new: Give all glory to God and keep on trucking.

Thank you.

PREACH NOT, SPEAK TRUTH...AND TRUST

As I have often said, my journal is essential to me because it, in effect, writes itself. I am sometimes surprised by what I read later. Today's entry is a "for instance" for it almost shocks my conscious...it is very telling to me:

I need to open my thinking to the FACT that I, too, am being adversely affected by Trumpism, America on the verge of fascism...and I do not even know exactly what fascism is...it is not democracy is what I do know...democracy is my free voice heard...ignored or not...I can and do speak free...I am realizing that this is not fantasy-fear, i.e., we are the German people of the '30s who ignored Hitler until he was the power...that Trump IS on the verge of taking control of America is a real threat...Lord, hear our prayer...Thank You.

Well, that sent chills up my back...chills with a voice of its own: "Do something...but what?"  

Vote, of course. Publish my written word of peril-at-hand. Think my gift-thought, and this, too, is of God. Speak but don't preach. Trust.

Trust that the power of God is greater than any human power. Trust that what we think, do, say is God's will, God's way for the good of America and the consciousness of like-believers...i.e., for the good of the Universe, God's will, God's way.

Then continue to walk, talk, think, live in that higher consciousness...with Thank You leading the Way.

Thank you. 

TO SEEK GOD'S WILL, GOD'S WAY

 I can see no other way for discernment than a life in the Spirit, a life of unceasing prayer and contemplation, a life of deep communion with the Spirit of God. Such a life will slowly develop in us an inner sensitivity, enabling us to distinguish between the law of the flesh [ego] and the law of the Spirit [soul]. -- Henri Nouwen, Daily Meditation, October 23,2024

My ego disguised as my own spirit often dons its high-heeled sneakers and goes for a walk-about. Yesterday exemplifies such an occasion...my reasoning mind, wrapped in rigid, righteous and right, was at work and in overdrive.

Long story short...around noon yesterday, my personal parking space was taken over by an outsider, even with ample signage warning that towing is enforced. 

I went to bed last night at 9:00, the other's car was still in my parking space, and I was worn to a frazzle from having made multiple trips checking on if, when and how much longer before the tow truck did its work. The fear, of course, was that my car would be towed, and the other left to gloat.

As I went to bed, I prayed God's will, God's way and actually slept at peace. 

This morning, the car is gone, and I have found another level to my initiation...the need for me to find within me a deeper way to do love. We learn early that to love is not always to show forth rainbows and roses...ah, we learn the words, but the doing? 

The doing is the action we must take that benefits all parties in a boondoggle...which is not ours to self-determine. Ours is to first trust...then do something about something, and when wrong, to promptly admit it. 

This is the long journey...changing our mind. From I am right and you're going to pay, to I am right, but I'll rise above it, to there is no right or wrong, only God's will, God's way...now, how do I show that forth? 

There. That is our only goal today...to seek to do God's will, God's way. Imperfectly. sincerely. 

We have to learn when our own spirit is at work and when the Spirit of God is at work. Paul calls this gift the discernment of spirits. -- Fr Richard Rohr, Daily Meditation, October 23,2024

Thank you.

THERE IS NO CHEAP HUMILITY...JUST THANK YOU

Spiritual director Ruth Haley Barton writes that the Ignatian practice of discernment helps us to recognize God’s guidance in our lives....an authentic discernment process identifies love as our primary calling. *** Discernment is intended to take us deeper and deeper into the heart of God’s will: that we would follow God.

The Ignatian practice of discernment is a practice about which I know nothing. To the best of my recollection...dicey at best...I've never heard of Ignatian anything. 

Yet when I read Barton's article this morning, I was home...gratefully home. I had a new light glowing within me.

I realize that it has been burning for some time, but it got its legs with my share last Sunday morning when I shared about love...about my need and my answered prayer in finding a new definition for love. No one there had mentioned love as such...it wasn't even on the table. That I would mention it...I who can sometimes still get embarrassed just hearing the word...spoke to me even then as I continued with my share.

As usual in my spiritual growth, I thought no more about it, yet two days later, I am realizing the answer to my unasked questions...the answer being love. Love...neither physical nor mental, but love entirely Self birthed, driven and experienced with any personal effort at bay. 

Here's my great and glorious blinding flash: From what I read about the Ignatian practice of discernment, that has been my goal for living (imperfectly met) for all of my spiritual-growth years. 

Love all, give love, learn to love as God loves...without exception...I was gifted with that knowledge...imperfectly...way long ago. That's the experience of the rough and rugged road we walk. To stumble, fall, doubt, get up believing and carry on, repeatedly, is to be blessed by God and to keep on living it just so, doubting and believing interchangeably. Then...home. 

There is no cheap humility; spiritual growth is learning to love and laugh...and practice gratitude.

Thank you.

OUR PRAYED-FOR YET ALWAYS UNEXPECTED GIFT

Until we discover the 'little way,' we almost all try to gain moral high ground by obeying laws and thinking we are thus spiritually advanced. — Richard Rohr, Daily Meditation, October 5. 2024 

It seems I keep being returned to the "little way." 

I can accept that because some time back I thought of my new-to-me spiritual path as less than the fancy-schmancy ways I was hearing as being taught...a lot of religiosity, smoke screens and high-dollar verbosity. None of which fit me...thank you, Jesus.

I had long since made peace with my "new" or "little" way, but it was a comfort to receive from my beloved Fr Richard written assurance that my way was God's way for me. 

I have taken a few self-will directed trips and/or tangents, none of which I regret...each helped me learn that we have only one need, and that is we need to change our mind. To change our mind is of God and not possible by the unaided will. The higher lesson we re-re-relearn: God's will, God's way is already done...completed...perfected within us.

Yet, there's the reasoning mind's quandary: Unwilling to chance personal acceptance, we keep trying to "get" it which is reasoning mind's block and spiritual mind's gift. 

Until three days after we are dead the umpteenth time, we'll still be trying to "get" it. No doubt, that is a rest-of-life fact that, when accepted, brings love and laughter and the comforting knowledge that we've doing it right by doing it wrong. 

God's will, God's way does not arrive by reason...it's a prayed-for, yet always unexpected, gift.

Thank you.

LOVE AND LAUGH...AND PRAY 'THANK YOU'

Seek joy in God and peace within; seek to rest in the good, the true, and the beautiful. It’s the only resting place that also allows us to hear and bear the darkness. —Fr Richard Rohr, Daily Meditation, October 12, 2024

To be peaced in the midst of uncertainty is the Crist within...over which we have no control, only unquestioning grace.

There are many unanswered "topics" floating in me, around me...I seek no answers, I pray thank you, and I do two loads of wash. If I kept a diary, that would be my entry for yesterday.

My life seems to be at sixes and sevens right now...yet I fret not. I repeat my today's favorite message, and this, too, is of God, and I do the next thing appearing to me.

There...the first sentence of that last paragraph is an accurate indicator of where I am today; i.e., my life seems...I fret not. 

I suspect this is the place I have so long sought. 

Now what?

Love and laugh and keep on keeping on comes to mind. My understanding God is very practical...and I am very grateful.

Thank you.