To spiritually know things on a deeper level, ***** we’ll know that Someone Else is doing the knowing through us. God is no longer 'out there.' At this point, it’s not like one has a new relationship with God; it’s like one has a whole new God! -- Fr Richard Rohr, Daily Meditation, December 13, 2024
I read Fr Richard this morning, and I melted...I knew and I knew I knew and have known that for some time, and always for our well-being.
Comes now a blinding flash of the obvious: God may be holding dementia for me...that may be God's will, God's way for me.
I saw how I keep trying to sway God away from dementia so that I have no mental problems...that my mind be sharp, all clear.
Then I recall that was my earnest desire with regard to my original incurable, progressive disease...
which now that I've lived with it for over 50 years, I know it to be my personal pearl. Clearly, I pray for God's will, God's way while secretly resisting anything but my will, my way.
This morning, I got a whisper that dementia may be what I already have...which birthed the rest of the BFO: If so, that, too, is for my benefit, and I welcome it.
Ah, the blessed relief.
Now I need to go to the doctor for a medical diagnosis. If I am found to have a sharp and clear mind for a person 80+, am I relieved or ready to go through the fear again...when, not if, old-age forgetfulness comes on stronger, waving its fear-flag of dementia?
The reasoning mind knows no quit, does it? But neither does God, neither does God...which is precisely how we build trust. It's all good.
Thank you.
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