Blinding flash of the obvious: I am living today my still more spiritual growth by the fear I am experiencing...neither attempting to avoid the fear, nor praying for it to just go away.
A therapist was recommended to me, and I had my appointment with him yesterday. In my mind, we were to discuss the possibility of the onset of dementia...or my fear of that. He did not get that message, and we discussed my past and how I got where I am today which he diagnosed as just fine and canceled the scheduled next three appointments.
BUT...we only got to my fear of dementia in the last 30 minutes. I told him of my two examples of total mind blanks which happened months apart. He flat out named those as old-age forgetfulness but recommended a medicine for sharpening the brain in old age. I intend to get it and use it.
Since I consciously did not direct that session, I accept that I am being led by God's will, God's way. I am experiencing the difference between God's will being done through me and my self-determined objectives being done by me. I am not self-determining, maybe holding back in fear of that...with that, too, being God's will, God's way.
In living in this newer consciousness today, I realize I have been here far longer than I have allowed me to believe...again, God's will, God's way and for my benefit.
Thank you.
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