SAY, BELIEVE: I DO NOT KNOW

I wonder if the reasoning mind, and most especially the well-educated reasoning mind, isn't the great impediment to spiritual growth, by which I mean God.

When I was in college, I took a battery of tests which lasted for hours (I remember it as days, but surely that's faulty memory), at the end of which I was found to be at the genius level. That label was the single hardest thing I had to overcome to even begin to develop a God of my own understanding. (Have I mentioned that I did not make grades in college?...whole 'nother story.) For me, apparently, "genius" equated to "yes, but..." when it came to God or matters of God.

I see that often today with people who sincerely want to believe in a loving God...but their reasoning mind just cannot/will not let go of the "facts" as they know them.

It is excruciatingly painful for a smart person to say, out loud and sincerely, "I do not know." It is even more painful to allow that there is Something that does know, is on our side, will fix the problem in the best way possible for us personally, especially when s/he has a hint that "the best way possible" according to It looks less than wonderful to him...is, in fact, an "Oh no, not that!" to her reasoning mind.

It is only by taking that leap of faith that we find that that less-than-wonderful is...wonderful. And all we really have to do is change our mind...in effect, hold our nose and take a leap of faith.

It was a great gettin' up morning when I realized that, for me, God's reality of good is more than often in exact reverse of my reality of good. I have had it happen too often to count...I dread, I pray my dread to not happen, it happens...it turns out to be my good.

I realized that I saved time and anxiety when I learned to welcome my dread. I started very irreverently (in case I looked like a fool to God) by saying/praying, "Knock yourself out, God...I'm trusting that which  I'm seeing coming is for my good. I don't know, and You're supposed to."

Obviously, my results were more than acceptable to me, or I wouldn't still be thinking, feeling, being, doing it...to the extent that today a simple "Thank You" suffices.

Thank You.

THE HUMAN CONDITION NEEDS GOD

"The human condition is such that we need to live by a higher standard than we’d naturally choose."

That's in my notes, and I have no idea where I heard it or who said it, but it's clearly too brilliant to have originated with me. I do think it's an excellent reason to believe in a power greater than ourselves, which for me,  is a personal, loving God, alive and well within me, without me.

Thank You.

A LIFETIME AND BEYOND

The lesson to learn is that it is not the avoidance of a disturbing thought, word or deed, it is how we deal with that disturbance that determines our peace of mind. For that, we learn, is the basis for giving up fighting anything and anybody.

How we deal with the disturbance is by turning our spotlight within:

• How did I get here?
• What was I thinking?
• What were my motives?
• What was I expecting?
• Did I consider before wading into this that I may be wrong?
• How can I make peace within me that I may be wrong?
• That s/he may be right?
• That it really does not matter which because neither of us is 100 percent of either...right or wrong.

That is what is meant by restraint of tongue and pen for if we will take the time for those few questions, the flash of fury in our gut will have been banked for the moment. Then, if we use that moment well, it will stretch into enough time for us to take responsibility for our own feelings, thoughts and actions. 

A fight averted is God's will done right.

That is the lesson to learn...the learning takes a lifetime (and possibly beyond), according to me.

Thank You.

FINDING OUR WAY TO UNDERSTANDING

He who holds back rising anger like a rolling chariot, him I call a real driver; other people are but holding the reins. -- The Buddha

This is another arrow pointing us in the right direction; i.e., "We have given up fighting anything and anybody." 

We have to become totally, completely, unconditionally in personal agreement with that statement...it must become our watchword, our way of life...else it's just so many words. 

The key, I'm convinced, is in learning to laugh at ourselves...especially our ego-need to respond in kind, to react instead of act. Reaction takes no thought...action, if it is to be beneficial to us, requires "prior proper planning."

Prior proper planning begins with remembering "to control my instinctive reactions and feel compassion and acceptance for the other person, rather than ridicule and rejection." That just means finding our own way to understand the other person. I once heard that we can never hate anyone we truly understand...which does not mean we need to invite a practicing pedophile into our hearts, but it does mean we cannot hate him else we risk being eaten inside out by our own bile.

Another prior is remembering that the emery-board people in our lives are our angels. They rub us the wrong way which, if we're following directions, turns our thoughts from how wrong they are to "what is wrong with me that I cannot accept them?" This is where "thank You" is priceless...it's a quick reminder that this is a good thing, and we don't need to know why. It smooths out our negative reactions and helps to remind us that we needed this person in order to get over our own defect. 

To me, unresolved anger, usually parading as righteous rage, is just unresolved self-pity on steroids...it is the result of taking ourselves too seriously. There is great freedom in learning to laugh at oneself...my goal is that it become my fall-back reaction.

Thank You.

PRAISE IT AND BE GLAD

Now you are in a new realm of Mystery and grace, where everything good happens! – from today’s Daily Meditation of Fr. Richard Rohr 

A new way of thinking, living, acting, being: We begin to see everything that happens as good...as God's perfect working.

Things, happenings, events, thoughts, feelings...no matter how ugly, awful, terrifying to the mind's eye…we can remind ourselves that this, too, is God's perfection working FOR us, for them, for all.

We cannot find the goodness through our reasoning mind...through thinking, analyzing, talking...we can only find it through meditation, and then not on the problem! We can only find the goodness through the silent, patient acknowledgment of that which is is of God...praise it and be glad.

Thank You.

GOING FOR GRACE

I was once told that we have a choice in life: We can choose to become a highly polished acorn or we can choose to become a mighty oak...it's purely our choice.

That's one reason we no longer need regret our regrets. It will seem that every time we show ourselves off as a highly polished acorn, an ancient regret will float through our mind, and we will realize that we must turn ourselves again to still more spiritual growth, the one path to becoming a mighty oak. Our regrets are now our "Turn Around, Don't Drown" sign.

And there's the grace and the gratitude...it is only through spiritual growth that we can know that. It is only through spiritual growth that we can head in that right direction. Our reasoning mind did, does and will lust for the highly polished acorn every time.

Our goal now must be to keep cutting the lag time between lusting for polish and going for grace.

Thank You.

LION TO LAMB

My morning blinding flash of the obvious: I am [we are] the lion to the Lord's lamb. It is the lion that must learn to give over, to restrain himself, to train herself through the lamb to accept, not resist, the lamb…to become like the lamb.

To become the Lamb.

Thank you.