LEARNING TO LOVE REQUIRES UNLEARNING

God does not demand that we all agree. God only asks that we love one another well. -- Rachel Held Evans, "Richard Rohr's Daily Meditation," March 21, 2026

Learning to love...dispassionately, with no "giftee" promised...is the most difficult thing I've ever attempted. I realized that when, looking back, I recognized my lack of unselfed love.

I am grateful that I learned and still live with the realization that there are only two emotions: Love and Fear. Apparently, I lived under the assumption that any "feel good" passed for love, and that was close enough to perfect for me. Mentally expanding the two emotions entered and saved me. It has been...admittedly, still is...a less than easy slog. 

"It" being the effort required to change my mind. In truth, to upgrade my mind. To feel repulsed by any mouth-breather...repulsed unto bad-mouthing them if only in my mind...is my turning point. That realization was the origin of my finding the gift of thank You. Resist not, with thank You following, became my inner mantra.

I have been on this journey for over fifty years, and I suspect I've only just begun...but I do believe: If not in this life span, then the next...always moving upward.

Thank you.

BEING PEACED IN THE MIDST OF FEAR

H]ave patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart. Try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books written in a foreign language. Do not now look for the answers. They cannot now be given to you because you could not live them. It is a question of experiencing everything. At present you need to live the question. Perhaps you will gradually, without even noticing it, find yourself experiencing the answer, some distant day. -- The German poet, Rainer Maria Rilke

I first posted this Rilke quote on March 29, 2016. 

It is particularly fitting for me today what with my current resistance to my personal fear of dementia...my fear that I may be coming into full-blown dementia. (Personally, I prefer to refer to it as old-age forgetfulness.) 

Words are comforting, we rely on them to sooth our jangled nerves. Ah, but they come into reality when we try to use them to fix our perceived broken place. Soothing is nice, but it doesn't fix. 

Comes the blinding light: Only God can fix, and only God's will, God's way can do that. 

Comes the dire reality, seldom if ever does God's fix arrive looking personally comforting. The lesson we continue to learn: We must needs walk through our pain...or, more aptly, the cause of our pain.

Forever lesson, relearned as needed, sometimes daily: If it is appearing to us, welcome it. The cause of our pain is our resistance to what and how we are perceiving our life's problem.

Again, and yet again: Hug it and kiss it and let it go.

There. There is the proof that words are comforting, but they do not fix. Living through our trauma, be it a broken fingernail or the death of a loved one, is the way of the Lord. 

How else can we build faith if we never have a reason to have faith?

I feel fear...I pray my thank You for the fear for it is truly turning me to God.

Thank you.

ALL ONE IN THE GOODNESS OF GOD'S LOVE

It is such divine extravagance, a philosophy of love them into loving me back, that sets the pattern for all the prophets to follow. -- "Richard Rohr Daily Meditation," March 2, 2026

To me, "a philosophy of love them into loving me back," is the baseline from which all spiritual growth follows. When, without thought, we are living that, we know God's will, God's way as our own...as we breathe. 

Clearly, I forecast that without one hundred percent living experience...but my head hopes, my heart knows, my gut is good with that...so I walk it very nearly as much as I think it today. 

God knows my limitations, and I go to God to learn them which is spiritual growth. I used to seek my answers from whomever stood closest to me at the time. Kinda one-shot-deal spiritual growth. I regret it not...it was a starting point, and to start is ever God's grace.

My comfort today is that I know, and I know that I know, God loves me (and you) personally without qualifiers, and we are One in that goodness.

Thank you.

LESS-THAN AS MORE THAN ENOUGH

Throughout the Gospels, we find numerous teachings promoting downward mobility. The most familiar of these may be, 'The last shall be first, and the first shall be last.' (Matthew 20:16) "Richard Rohr Daily Meditation," March 19, 2026 [ABTW, happy birthday to me.]

Don't tell me God isn't in my thinking, my feeling, my doing, my being...and exchange "my" for "our." 

Looking back, I vaguely remember when it was that I came into my realization that less-than was right for me. I do know that it simply fit so I questioned it not; I built on it, and (gratefully) I still do.

Today, I joyfully accept that was when I gave up the will to win! To the reasoning mind, that has loser written all over it...spiritually ir all but sings "Peace in the Valley." 

For my own self I accept that I have barely begun...but I have begun, and I thank You, Lord. 

Thank you.

DO NOT LOOK FOR THE ANSWERS

[H]ave patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart. Try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books written in a foreign language. Do not now look for the answers. They cannot now be given to you because you could not live them. It is a question of experiencing everything. At present you need to live the question. Perhaps you will gradually, without even noticing it, find yourself experiencing the answer, some distant day. -- The German poet, Rainer Maria Rilke

I have put this Rilke quote out before, and I'm fairly certain I will again for there it is, the answer...his,  It is a question of experiencing everything. 

Ah, experiencing. 

We get to...we must...accept and walk through all that our own life offers us. Lest we forget: All that comes to us, comes by our invitation only.

 

End of mind-nattering questions pretending to be discussion.

Thank you.

ON LIVING ABOVE REASONING

My blinding flash this morning:  We are being led...whether we know it or not. 

There is a spiritual reason and a material reason for our being exactly where we are...ours to choose. When, not if, we choose spirituality, we begin to live anew.

Just as The Man needed water from the well, we need material-world aids, too. The underlying reason for the need is spiritual, our own inner treasure:  It is still more spiritual growth that brings one to that essential realization...the reasoning mind resists the idea.

Thy will, Thy way. Our will is of self; Thy will is of Self.

Thank you.

RADICAL UNITY...LOVE, AND THAT IS ALL

Radical unity with God and neighbor is the only way any of us truly heals or improves. -- "Fr Richard Rohr's Daily Meditation," March 2, 2026

We go to God for God and that is all...for that is all.

Thank you.

THE WELCOMING LIGHT OF GOD

I do not believe that sin is the enemy we often make it out to be, at least not when we recognize it and name it as such. When we see how we have turned away from God, then and only then do we have what we need to begin turning back. Sin is our only hope, the fire alarm that wakes us up to the possibility of true repentance. -- Author Barbara Brown Taylor, "Richard Rohr's Daily Meditation," March 10, 2026

I suspect that the inner meaning of that quote is the insight with which I was gifted way back when; i.e., "wrong" is not the enemy..."wrong" is what turns us around to do "right."  

Blinding flash...that gift has been growing me ever since and still is...please and thank You.

When we get stuck in the remorses of our self-described "wrong," we seldom find God's way of accepting that which is gifted us. 

My life took me down the dark hole until I gave over, gave up, gave in...surrendered in a word...to come into the anonymous light of God.

My continuing life lesson: Find the good in the bad appearing...there the light of God welcomes.

Thank you.

BLESSED BEYOND THE MIND'S IMAGINING

I do not believe that sin is the enemy we often make it out to be, at least not when we recognize it and name it as such. When we see how we have turned away from God, then and only then do we have what we need to begin turning back. Sin is our only hope, the fire alarm that wakes us up to the possibility of true repentance. -- Author Barbara Brown Taylor, "Daily Meditation," March 10, 2026

The inner meaning of the Taylor quote is the insight I was gifted with way back when, i.e., wrong is not the enemy...wrong is what turns us around to go for right, a.k.a., God.

That blinding flash has been developing within me ever since...and is still developing me.

When we get stuck in the remorses of our self-described "wrong," we rarely find God's will, or acceptance of that which is gifted us. 

My early life took me down the dark hole into the anonymous light of God. There I learned to find the good in the bad appearing...there God awaits.

My life today...now in my 80s...is my pearl beyond price. 

I do not have many of the "things" I prayed for back in the day, i.e., money, a man, money. No, but I do have the pearls beyond price, i.e., peace of mind, love for others, the God of my own understanding. 

I am blessed beyond the mind's imagining.

Thank you. 

PEACE OF MIND BRINGS PEACE ON EARTH

We have ceased fighting everything and everybody. -- Anonymous

Comes the light! 

We realize unto acceptance that the "fight" begins in our head...in our thinking...in our first resistant thought.

The need to cease resisting everything and everybody is but a beginning. Now the thought must be raised up into action. 

Our choice is not to resist but to overcome...to overcome "my way" thoughts, not to ignore for others to deal with but to overcome within using the Sermon as our guide. 

We no longer opt to set others straight. By grace and by God, all sides are lifted into the God space where all are in agreement...God's will, God's way. 

With God's will, God's way leading us out of self, we find peace of mind...thus, peace on earth.

Thank you.

OUR CHANGED LIFE IS GOD'S GIFT

....a whole new set of behaviors and lifestyle will emerge. It is not that if I am righteous, then I will be loved by God; rather, I must first come to experience God’s love and then I will—almost naturally—be righteous. -- paraphrase of "Fr Richard Rohr's Daily Meditation," March 7, 2026

From my own experience, I believe "to experience God's love," we must experience the mess of our own making. We must crash and burn which we have so arduously been attempting to avoid...by denial mostly.

There is no God in denial...there is, however, an invitation to God to come save us from our self.

There it is...God's gift to the down-and-out: Realization unto admission unto acceptance of our utter powerlessness, and Help! is born.

The beginnings of faith is trust. In trust, we go to God for God, that is all...and unknowingly we are healed. Our changed life is our daily proof.

Thank you.

RADICAL UNITY: GIVE...ONLY GIVE

Radical unity with God and neighbor is the only way any of us truly heals or improves. -- Fr Richard Rohr, 'Daily Meditations,'' March 2, 2026   

Give over, give up, give in. There...the blinding flash of the obvious that came to me some years back.

I have been open to learning how to do that (to give, only give) ever since. By open, I do not mean I have actually achieved it. I mean I have been gifted on occasion, and I remain willing to continue to try for it. to receive it.

I know I cannot, of myself, do that, give only give, but that we can. With God as our guide and goal, we can and do practice giving. "All" that is required of us is that we be willing to try. 

God's gift of insight: We are not in it to win it; we are in it to give it. Ah, we can only give what we have earned with God as our teacher, leader, guide and goal.

The underlying wonderment: We have given over, given up, given in on occasion...and not realized it until sometime later. It cannot be a self-determined objective; it is God's gift plain and simple.

We "win" when our reasoning mind is into regrets, and we realize spiritual peace...both at the same time.  There: radical unity.

Thank you.

GOD CONSCIOUSNESS FROM WITHIN

My morning gift of consciousness:

Some of our biggest mistakes come when we are trying really hard to do God's will...only we have self-determined, without asking, what God's will is, and we are not even close to the Truth.

We willingly accept something we don't even want, calling it God's will when in truth God doesn't want/need it either. 

Lessons we learn: Stay open, keep an open mind, invite God's will to flow freely in consciousness--"to do with me and to build of me as Thy will. Thy will, not mine, be done."

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Thank you.

TO KNOW LOVE, SOW LOVE

An invaluable living-tool which I have earned is the gift of welcoming...looking back with my mind full of love and laughter...no regrets.

There's a line in the song "Loving Arms" which describes too well my once-lived attitude about life in general, i.e., looking back and longing for the freedom of my chains....

I doubt not I have written about this...probably recently...but that attitude has been upgraded by God, and I live with a new perspective on life...a happy perspective.

Now, it's looking back and laughing in freedom from my chains...or my rues, regrets and remorses. Those three r's once ruled my thoughts, my feelings, my life.

My upgraded attitude has grown slowly but ever upward on the winding road of still more spiritual growth. Awakening to the fact that my life is not about me, it's about letting go and letting God...for the benefit of others.

The great and glorious discovery has been that when we live our life for the benefit of others, we know peace, love and joy. Which, in order to keep, we freely give away.

God loves us sooo much.

Thank you.

IN TRUST, DO...THEN JUDGE NOT

I am still heading in the right direction whether I know remember it or not!

My memory is in God's care, too...trust and judge not.

There...henceforth, mine to do daily: trust and judge not. 

Like most directions, easy words to say, but the doing is the hidden gift. To do is mine to give my thank You for as I do the next thing. And if the next thing I choose to do is not the right thing, we've got that covered, too.   

If it's not the right thing, promptly admit it. 

We can now do the next thing that appears to us...right or wrong, we are aiming in trust in a new direction. 

Trust God, and move out of self. It is to trust...ah, we are to trust.

Thank you. 

WE GO TO GOD FOR GOD AND THAT IS ALL

Taking responsibility for the common good is the more important moral mandate..-- "Fr Richard Rohr's Daily Meditation," March 2, 2026

Further, per Fr Richard: When the common good is the focus, preaching is not about imposing guilt and shame on individuals, but about giving vision and encouragement to society.

There. That is the center of my seeking still more spiritual growth...to live for the benefit of others is to live self-centered-fear free. Living for the benefit of others lifts our egoic nature...kisses it on the lips and sets us free.

Be prepared: This is a lifetime of crawling, to stumbling, to walking, to running, to Free At Last with stumbles and bumbles guaranteed...why else would we joy just knowing we have God at our back?

I have needed every second of every hour to God-honest-want to walk this truth. I have not been walking blind, just instinctively the majority of the time...led to go for the spiritual, away from the self-determined.

Release self-will and open to God's will, God's way...ah, greener pastures...living in the love of God again. 

Thank you. 

GETTING IT WRONG TO GET IT RIGHT

We are invited to] take a journey of faith. It may be plagued by uncertainty, but we can trust in God’s presence along the way....The way of faith is not a way of certitude. -- "Richard Rohr's Daily Meditation," February 27, 2026

I have long felt that self-confidence needs to be a building block to Self confidence; i.e., faith in a word. Fr Richard's quote nails it...the way of faith is not a way of certitude.

That's how I (finally) awoke to getting it wrong to the reasoning mind is often getting it right spiritually.

I often quote the Thaddeus Golas line, We must go beyond reason to love...only I like the last word to be "God"...we must go beyond reason to God.

We must come to total dependence on God...we cannot get there by relying on our reasoning mind alone...or. quite often, at all. Our reasoning mind is self on the hoof, and its singular purpose is to protect self, which is according to our own idea of protection. 

There is no God in self-protection...or more truthfully, there is no God awareness in self-protection. God is there, our awareness of God is missing. There is only the feeling of fear and reliance on self to protect us.

To reiterate, we must ever build our trust in God being present along the way, knowing that the way of faith is not a way of certitude.

Thank you.

TO STAY DETACHED FROM THE TEMPTATION, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of February 24, 2018.]

The grace of God is a wind which is always blowing. -- Sri Ramakrishna [from Eknath Easwaran, "Words to Live By," today]

Isn't that a comforting thought? That the grace of God is an ever-present wind blowing in, around, through us. All we need do is stay our mind on Thee, and the grace of God walks us free.

The block to the grace of God is our self in the form of our self-determined wants that we choose to believe are needs. Those wants, depending entirely on our attachment to them, become the God of our understanding in the moment. No matter how insignificant they appear (running late? the green light is our God right then) or how significant they appear (unexpected and steep medical expenses turn the dollar into our higher power without another thought).

According to me, any perceived lack that we consider essential to our life becomes our entire focus, our God, and grace blows by unrealized, unaccepted, unfulfilled.

"God Calling" note dated 2/24/12: BFO - realized 'the kingdom of heaven' as our worst fear/greatest glory signifying nothing - Jesus in the wilderness being tempted and staying detached from the temptation.

Thank you.

WE, OF OUR OWN SELVES, CANNOT, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of February 28, 2014.]

Acceptance. The very word is inviting. It has that huggable sound...that “Oh I want one!” sound. Well, get ready for a shock to the old hemorrhoids. Acceptance is just surrender wrapped in pretty paper.

And, who’s kidding whom, we know what surrender means. Not to put too mean a point on it, it means You Lose. Stop Fighting. The war is over, and you lost.

Until we surrender to the very fact that we've been resisting, the fact with all the hair on it, we will never reach the tra-la-la pretty. The paradox is that we have to kiss it on the lips in order to reach that part. We have to kiss it on the lips while it still looks like the frog it is...and feel in the doing totally alone, bereft, hopeless. And kiss it anyway. Because we have no hope. And here comes another paradox! As Walter Brueggeman says, "The home of hope is hurt.”

It is in that very hopelessness that we find God…who has been trying to get our attention all along. Fr. Richard Rohr says, "Divine love is received by surrender instead of performance or perfection."

The perfection of acceptance is that it does not change the fact that we've been resisting...it changes our perception of that fact. From worst thing ever to God is so good to me. The essential ingredient? Our realization that we of our own selves cannot make that change. We go to God for God.

Thank you.

GOD'S WILL, GOD'S WAY...BRING IT ON!

We have to turn to God and allow ourselves to be led on this faith journey. -- "Richard Rohr Daily Meditations," February 22, 2026

Fr Richard's lesson continues: We have to be willing to experience the Exodus in our own lives and enter into our own desert wanderings. We have to let God liberate us from captivity to freedom, from Egypt to Canaan, not fully knowing how to cross the desert between the two.

I suspect I am experiencing the Exodus in my own life, and trepidation hangs heavy within me... on the horns of a dilemma fits me this morning. Am I willing?...ready?...able? to walk my own desert wanderings.

When I committed to still more spiritual growth some fifty years ago (versus every new wonder drug the medical profession could and would offer), I was blessedly young(er) and "knew" considerably more about God than I do now. The untested always know more it seems. 

But there it is...there's the proof of my puddin'...I do not know as I once knew, but I believe from my toes to my nose, and I believe based on faith and experience...God has never failed me. His journey for me has just been lengthier...unknowable in a word. 

We come to believe we are on God's journey when we find our self whispering, Are You sure this is the Way? 

The answer does not come until after we have felt every rock on our road, felt every thorn, lived through every doubt all while believing (or wanting to) that this, too, is God's will, God's way. 

I'm there again. I'm grateful still. Thy will, Thy way, Lord...bring it on!

Thank you.

ON LEARNING TO LOVE...TO GIVE OF 0UR SELF

My inner message this morning was that I do not know how to love. I do not and have never realized how to love...only as I feel it and that is dependent on who, how and/or what I am getting. 

I am realizing again...or still...that I do not know how to love.

I do not and have never realized how a feeling of love in general feels. Other than good. 

I'm not even sure that good isn't how a feeling of love in general feels for everybody. 

Blinding flash of the obvious: A feeling of love is a simple need to give of our self for the benefit of another. 

An unknown at the time example of pure love: My sister, age 13-14, sick in bed with the flu, me. age 10-11, doing all I possibly could to bring happy to her. To get a smile, to know I was helping her in whatever way possible. And she smiled. and I knew happy. 

There...God's gift of remembrance to me this morning.

Thank you.

ON WELCOMING CRASH-AND-BURN, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of February 21, 2018.]

It is in the devastation of surrender that we are gifted with the sweet taste of impersonal victory. It is that impersonal victory that is a brief glimpse of the 4th dimension, and we know peace.

Never having known true peace, our reasoning mind mistakes it for nuthing' happenin' here so we self-determine various actions based on self that we must take...thus blocking our realization for as long as it takes for us to become entirely ready to give over, give up, give in.

There it is. The golden key to the 4th dimension...surrender of self to Self...give over, give up, give in.

Thank you.

MY ONLY JOB...DETACH, I

[The following is a slightly reworked reprint of my post of February 10, 2015.]

Thank you, Father, for the mini blinding flashes of the obvious that I randomly receive. The flashes are so short and come so quickly that I can't commit them to memory. I rest in Your assurance that they are with me, within me, awaiting the time for my need of them. When I am in need, my perfect BFO can and will flow forth for my benefit.

My only job is to remain detached from my reasoning mind, trying to figure it out which only holds the BFO at bay.

Thank you.

UNFINISHED...STILL GROWING

The ancient path of the desert mystics invites us to disrupt the patterns of ego and empire through the courageous pursuit of inner liberation. —Stephen Copeland 

Inner liberation. I ponder those words. I ponder those words until they become mine...until I realize a transformation within/without me, specifically my Soul. My Soul of which I feel nothing physically, but I realize to be sense is my everything.

Looking back on my spiritual awakening, some fifty years now, I am amazed at my singular effort. For that is not how I knew me to be...I was ever a one-shot deal person. 

In my freshman year at college (where else!), I learned a cynical take on trying: If at first you don't succeed, quit...don't be an ass about it. 

Most folks laughed at that; I took it to heart...one-shot deal.

Today, I am realizing ever more fully my self over the years becoming My Self. I am that I Am. 

There it is...the gift of gold in turning 80 and still growing. 

I am 80+ today and content to be...unfinished in order to stay fresh in God's gift of new growth.

God loves me so much...God loves us so much.

Thank you.  

THE BLOSSOMING OF FAITH

The real test of spiritual maturity ... is whether we have been transformed so that our maturity plays out in regular life. -- "Richard Rohr Daily Meditations," February 20, 2026

In short, that is the actual practice of living our life by the grace of God...to know it is to show it. If we are not showing it, we are knowing the words but denying our self the action.

In my spiritual growth, I am a far cry from where I want to be...but nearer, my God, to Thee.

My recent blinding flash of the obvious: Living by a self-imposed standard of one hundred percent right or one hundred percent wrong is self, parading self...there is no Self in it.

Often it seems as though spiritual growth consists of contradictions. Yet it is in the contradictions that we find the proof we seek...by grace and by God

That's how faith blooms and blossoms...by grace and by God. But doesn't everything?

Thank you.

NOT TAUGHT BUT CAUGHT

Live simply, forgive deeply, and love fearlessly. --  David W., "Richard Rohr's Daily Meditation," February 19, 2026

I am experiencing a deeper understanding of what I have been learning these past many years. David W.'s quote fairly well describes the Word I hear. 

To be very clear, the It that I seek, that I am beginning to experience, is as Trappist monk Thomas Merton taught: The way of simplicity, to recapture some of the way of the desert fathers. By grace and by God, I know I am a rank beginner, and I rejoice in that.

That is to say that my heart, my Soul, my body and my brain all know that I go to God for God and that is All. That is The Way, and I am living it...less than one hundred percent but heading in the right direction. 

The essence of the spirituality of the desert is that it was not taught but caught; it was a whole way of life...the Desert Fathers did not have a systematic way; they had the hard work and experience of a lifetime of striving to re-direct every aspect of body, mind, and soul to God. -- Benedicta Ward

Thank you.

THE SEEK

Seek and ye shall find.... Matthew 7:7

I realize this morning that I am on my own Seek...my own journey into my inner unrealized self...where My Self lives.

I am not a Bible reader as such, but, surprising to me, I do quote the Bible more than most anything else. So, thus, apparently, and by grace and by God, I rely on the Word of the Bible more than I ever realized. I am not even going to attempt to analyze that...it speaks for itself.

My reading this morning opened my eyes and my mind. I read of the vision quest, i.e., a path of descent, or journey into fierce landscapes.

I identified completely with the described journey and suspect, hope, know that is where I am, the path I am on, the path I have been on for the last 50 years...the reason the cop-out line looking back and longing for the freedom of my chains sings so loudly in my head when I am nearing another unknown breakthrough.

The reason of course is the path of descent is a journey into fierce landscapes. We were promised sunshine and roses! As we heard the rest of the story...being about fierce landscapes and hard traveling...we learned but ignored that that applied to us personally. Our egoic self clung to sunshine and roses.

Still more spiritual growth brought the dawn...the dawn of a new day, new way...God's will, God's way. All of a sudden, 50 years in, we awoke! The path of descent is God's will, God's way. All that is required of us is that we give over, give up, give in.

Once we try it all the way through to success through failure, we are freed...we know it and we show it. We know this is not a one-shot deal...this is for us now to practice every day. Period.

We detach from self to attach to Self in order to freely live by grace and by God.

Thank you.

NOW JUST DO IT

I wrote yesterday of my rues, regrets and remorses over my fear of doing...of doing anything, ergo doing nothing. 

God is so good to me...after I wrote yesterday of my judgment on me, I was gifted with the facts around my life in the past four to six weeks: Memory problems? or my anxiety disorder again?, my sister's death, the suicide of a friend's husband, the serious illness of a dear friend, the possibility of needing to move to assisted living, and more...the list seems endless. 

Of course, I know The Right Answer to each and all items on my list...let go and let God. 

I realize once again: The answer is not the solution; the solution is doing what it takes to get us to the place in our heart and soul of letting go to let God. 

In short, surrender. That hated/feared act: surrender. 

Surrender may be the most feared word in my world...yet it is the actual act of surrender that brings us to peace, to the peace of mind we've so longed for. We surrender by doing that which we fear to do. We walk through It. There is the proof of God in our life...our fear has become our peace.

All of these are pretty words...true words, but, until action is taken, just words. 

Now, today, I make the appointment for a neurological test to learn that I have my well-known anxiety on parade or the dreaded dementia. 

Even as I write, I realize I have taken over God's job. I have two diagnoses in mind...God may have a half-dozen or even more! Let go and let God is not just good advice, it is the only useful answer.

This I know...from my own personal experience, this I know: Whatever comes to me, comes for my benefit. 

Now, to just do it.

Thank you.

ON BEING FEAR-FROZEN IN PLACE

Blinding flash of the obvious: Whatever I am doing or not doing right this minute is what I am supposed to be doing. I am living God's will, God's way whether I am conscious of it or not. I am grateful; I pray thank You.

That BFO came to me just as I was about to go full-out panicking, as in, what to do, what to do?

I have been feeling stuck, knowing what I need to do but not doing it...like frozen in place. 

Not to put too fine a point on it, but I need to take the test for mental cognition. I was given a neurologist's name and phone number back in April or May...I have done nothing with that information.

My hold-back (excuse)? Do I go with meds or do I continue to trust God? 

I am aware the answer is fairly elementary...trust God and take the mental cognition test. 

On the surface, that is easy to know, easy to say, easy to judge, easy to regret. But I have learned to trust the inner voice, and It has a hold on me. It is the hold that I trust...when It says sit and wait on the Lord, I've learned to sit and wait on the Lord. 

I have also learned that my self-will can and does do my thinking for me without a by-your-leave...as in I'm often the last to know that was not God's will, God's way, it was wishful thinking plain and simple. 

Good advice I was once given for when I'm stuck: Hold your nose and take a leap of faith.

It is my truth that there are only two basic emotions: One is love and the other, fear. All other emotions are born in one or the other of those two. Ergo. I am afraid. Afraid to take that leap of faith.  

Ah, it is not that I sit and wait on the Lord...it is that I sit and wait in self-centered fear, ignoring the Lord.

Doing nothing is not my problem...doing nothing is hiding my problem. I am afraid to get over myself...the ultimate act of faith. So there. 

Now what? and when? 

Thank you.

GOD IS OUR KEEPER OF THE KEYS

We all walk in the garden whether we know it or not. We came from God and we will return to God. Everything in between is a school of conscious loving. — Richard Rohr, "Daily Meditations," February 14, 2026

I heard me talking to myself this morning. I was repeatedly saying, "I'm a mess. I am a mess." 

When I finally got my own attention, I heard me saying, "And what better place to be? God has my mess, my cluttered-by-self mess, for me to shuck."

I love when God talks to me through me...I can be very clear then.

As an aside, the husband of a friend of mine committed suicide this past week...he had been very ill for a long time with no hope, except death. Ergo...the relief, the blessed relief. Followed by the guilt, the damned guilt. Followed by the relief, etc., etc., etc.  I wonder if all of the conflicted feelings around self-inflicted death aren't God's distraction tool...coulda, woulda, shoulda seems to rule family and friends in suicides. A long-time prayer of mine...to go when my time comes as determined by God alone.

My sister died recently of natural causes three days passed her 91st birthday. I am reminded...re-reminded...that with her passing I am the last member of my family still standing. Being "the baby" of the family, little heavy lifting was ever demanded of me. I am getting the picture...all the leftover lifting is now mine by grace and with God.

God is my keeper of the keys. I accept when, as and if needed, the perfect key will be given to me to unlock whatever gift awaits me. 

Lesson a-learning: Everything needed, opens for our benefit...by grace and by God.

Thank you.

FEAR...RESIST IT NOT FOR IT TOO IS OF GOD

According to me, there are two ways of seeing life even as we live it...materially, from our self-centered fear perspective or from our Soul-sight, i.e., spiritually...God's will, God's way.

We live primarily from self until something happens to us...usually something to our reasoning mind that is awful, terrible, unacceptable...and yet in the end we find it to be the pearl beyond price...that which brought us out of self into Self.

My personal experience moved me deeper: I lived by self-determination until I lost my belief in my own self and was turned within to the Power greater than self, to Self.

Looking back, I realize I was lifted by my decision born of fear...my decision to turn my will and my life over to the care of the God of my own understanding. To let go and let God...to trust.

I am at another turning point in my life. I am in my eighties now. and dementia is running older peoples' lives or trying to at any rate. Or, more honestly, fear of dementia is the culprit...large and in charge, trying to fill that place where God lives.

To the best of my ability, I am letting it...I resist it not. I am learning still, yet, again to welcome any and all appearances in my life...coming to or flowing from me, my thoughts, my fears. They are all under God's protection and for my benefit.

If my incurable, progressive disease can be a good thing, and it is and has been so in my life for over fifty years, than so can dementia be. 

Knock yourself out, dementia! We love ya, Baby...or will soon since love is God's will.

Thank you.

THE FATHER WITHIN...OUR SINGULAR SOURCE

The recovery of paradise takes place for the adult in humility and in spiritual nakedness. In other words not self-consciously but as the small child who just is present and just is vulnerable. - Thomas Merton -- "Richard Rohr's Daily Meditation," February 12, 2026

Before the recovery of paradise, consciousness is of the small self where our want to know all there is to know rules. More to the point, our want is to be lifted into spiritual consciousness where we know it all unselfconsciously...piously in a word. Without effort, by God's will, God's way alone, which describes a self-determined objective.

I believe I just found my Rosetta Stone: Without our effort, by God's will, God's way alone.

Never has that been a conscious thought of mine; but, apparently, I am afraid to trust that God's will, God's way needs our actual efforts to get us where we seek to be. We can liken it to standing at the foot of Mt Everest and praying that we can get to the top...never moving a muscle to get there, just repeating words, praying God will do it.

This is the first lesson we ever learned only it is here now at a deeper level...less intellect, more trust.

God is so good to us. From our eyebrows up, we are not where we seek to be...but from our heart and in all directions, we are exactly where God needs us to be. In order to move deeper inside our own self, to God's will, God's way, we need to trust God and do something about something.

Ah, blinding flash: We need to do something about something, and our trust in God will follow...reminding us the Father is and has ever been our singular Source.

Thank you.

RESIST NOT...LOVE AND LAUGH

There is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in. -- Leonard Cohen

That is one of my favorite lines...I recall when first I heard it, I felt flabbergasted. I had thought...really believed...that was a secret known to me alone. Wishful thinking, I reckoned, so keep it secret...don't risk being thought a fool or, worse, getting laughed at.

To be clear, or more honest anyway, my thinking was not as polished as Cohen's...but I had the same line of thinking. That is how I so quickly caught Cohen's words, his meaning behind the words....they were mine, too!

I came to realize I was lifted to that truth through my beloved Fellowship where, in effect, we are taught to live peace, love and joy and to pass it on. 

It takes time...a lot of time...to live our end goal: To cease fighting everything and everybody. 

To the human mind, that is not smart, not practical, not realistic...NOT. 

To the spiritually attuned mind, that is God's will, God's way...and our very hope of Heaven.

It has taken me over fifty years to live that, and to stumble ever so often...ah, but to love the stumble and laugh. That's when I hear, She's got it, by George, I think she'd got it! Then I know love.

I know of no way for hearts to be softened other than by a combination of love and suffering. -- Rev. Dr. Ruth Patterson, February 11, 2026

Thank you.

THE HOLY PLACE OF UNKNOWING, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of February 11, 2023.]

Still more spiritual growth begins with our seeking spiritual answers...to learn, to find out, to get a spiritual mindset.

The longer we are on this journey, heading in the right direction by doing it wrong a lot, we are heading for the place of unknowing...of which we are unconscious. There...the essence of spiritual growth.

The difference between unknowing and not knowing is unknowing shucks our shields, keeps an active letting go of what we think we know. The place of not knowing holds little to no curiosity...we don't know, whatever, end of the discussion.

To be in the place of not knowing is stayed in the material mind.

To get to the place of unknowing is Oned with God. Only we don't know it. We are unknowing. But our consciousness is raised.

According to me.

Thank you.

TO BE HAPPY, LIVE GRATEFULLY. I

[The following is a reprint of my post of February 27, 2015.]

Thank you, dear God, almighty force for good, that you work through me as you worked through Mohammad, through the Buddha, through Christ Jesus. Amen

Thank you that I do thy will always whether or not I know it...that my reasoning-mind mistakes are your right-road-to-Heaven for me. For it is in my mistakes that my rues, regrets and remorses are born, those very rues, regrets and remorses that you have shown me are, transmuted, my good, my gold.

Those very mistakes are my Teacher's tools, designed for me personally that I may grow from them by learning your will, your way. ..and thereby find my happiness.

Thank you.

THE NEW COLOSSUS GONE BEGGING. I

[The following is a reprint of my post of December 29, 2023]

'The New Colossus' by Emma Lazarus

Give me your tired, your poor,

Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,

The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.

Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed, to me:

I lift my lamp beside the golden door.

We come again to our need to recall the promise of America to the 'wretched refuse' of other teeming shores.

Again, and yet again, we trample that promise without so much as a backward glance as we roll on...and who cares if we're going in the right direction? We're strutting our stuff, showing 'em how it's done...and who cares if we do not have a clue our own self? Throw another log on the fire.

I miss Kate Smith singing 'God Bless America,' and America standing with its hand over its heart and tears of gratitude in its eyes.

Father, Forgive us for we know not what we do.

Thank you.

ON BEING SET FREE

....as Desmond Tutu says, those who have been oppressed are free from oppression, and those who have done the oppressing are free from being the oppressor, everyone is set free.  -- "Richard Rohr's Daily Meditation," February 6, 2026

Over the years, it has been my occasional challenge to mentally compare Tutu's actual state of oppression with my self-perceived state of oppression.

I suspect that helped me gain an ability to laugh at and with myself in my self-diagnosed "oppression," or, more honestly, in my rues, regrets and remorses.

Better than that, it helped me develop a sense of empathy for others...others who had less than...and best of all (so far) it has been the key that opened the compassion so well-hidden within me. Not just the feeling of compassion, but the ability for me, with God's grace, to compassionately do for others in need.  

In my eighties now, I do less actively but my thoughts are more consistently prayerful...less self-centered (not wholly just less, which is proof of God's will, God's way in my life). 

Thank you.

LOOKING BACK AND LONGING

Snow and frigid temps kept me house-bound for over a week, but I got out yesterday for an hour or two and still feel remarkably better...clearer...for it. Which reminds me of a long-ago blinding flash of the obvious: mental resistance is the only block. 

Apparently, I needed to find that reminder this morning. What other kind of block could there be to the personal experience of a loving God in our life?

A favorite line from a song from yesteryear...Looking back and longing for the freedom of my chains.... comes to mind.

That is a well-nigh perfect description of rues, regrets and remorses...looking back and longing for the freedom of my chains.... 

It doesn't get any clearer than that...to me at any rate.

My long-ago flash, mental resistance is the only block, when followed by thank You, is the mind's golden door. It opens us to the grace of gratitude, the most comforting answer to our reasoning mind's questions. 

Ah, a rush of gratitude just visited me...God is so good to me, and I am so grateful.

Thank you.

GRATITUDE...A HIGHER INVITATION

Imagine if all of us who know the Lord’s Prayer by heart took the challenge embedded in it seriously? .... This revolutionary prayer is a place to begin, now, wherever you are, whoever you are.... -- Author Kelley Nikondehal, February 4, 2026. [Lifted from today's "Richard Rohr's Daily Meditation" and reworked...with gratitude...for my meditation.]

Anyone who does not know the Lord's Prayer by heart, can just give over, give up, give in and pray Thank You. Consider that a higher invitation to learning. According to me.

Gratitude: God's word, God's way. 

Thank you.

RANDOM THOUGHTS...TO DELAY DOING

Snow and frigid temps have kept me house-bound for over a week. I realize that I am feeling crazy as a cockroach which is no exaggeration.

I am reminded of a God-gift to me from some years ago; namely. mental resistance is the only block....

There it is, written in my "God Calling" as if it were news: Mental resistance is the only block. That feels like news to me today,

But what other kind of block could there possibly be to the personal experience of a loving God in our life?

I am reminded of a favorite line from a song from yesterday...Looking back and longing for the freedom of my chains....

That is a well-nigh perfect description of rues, regrets and remorses...looking back and longing for the freedom of my chains....

It doesn't get any clearer than that...to me at any rate.

I am rambling...putting off going outside where I get to knock the snow off my car, then drive to the store, shop and return home. 

There...put down in black and white it doesn't seem that daunting. But I'm going nowhere, doing nothing toward that end for a few more hours. I got sober, I didn't get stupid.

Ah, a rush of gratitude just visited me...God is so good to me, and I am so grateful.

Thank you.

CHEAP SHOT AT GRATITUDE, I

[The following is a reprint of my blog of  January 31, 2014.]

God is so good to me.

I've had a bad case of I See Me for the past X number of days, and God has not lifted me out of it. Has not gifted me, has not punished me. There. That's how it's done. That's how we become transparent to our perceptions, our self-determined problems. Do as God does. Which is to laugh...as in, I wish!

I feel an attack of my mother coming on: "You have only yourself to blame." 

Oh, Mom, if you only knew. I have a whole cast of characters that I can blame...and will if left to my own devices. There's my cheap shot at gratitude...I'm never left to my own devices today.

That's how I know God is so good to me...I aspire to be God, and He sends Mom to set me straight. Hoo-boy.

Thank you.

I AM THAT I AM

 As I meditated this morning, I realized: I am as You need me be. 

Thank you.

LOST IN THE BUSY-NESS OF EGO, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of January 28, 2015.]

We must ever be aware that what we speak, what we share as ours, is indeed ours by the living of it. It comes to us, we live it, then it passes on. Skip the living of it and we miss "making it ours" which is our only chance at realizing it as our own truth.

Some of the best lessons I've ever received have come from my own mouth, and no one has been more surprised than me. But that's just surface stuff for then the task begins...we must learn to live that "best lesson" and not just talk it.

Again, it comes to us, we live it, then it passes itself on. Miss that second part, and we just continue to live in the busy-ness of ego.

Then, too, if we are just quoting others and calling it ours, we are not growing in our own consciousness. That is what Joel Goldsmith calls, "...mentally perceived, and not spiritually discerned..." [The Heart of the Mystic, at p. 1135], and Fr. Richard Rohr in his Daily Meditation of January 21, 2015, describes as "an idolatry of words."

Thank you.

ON GIVING GOD A GRIN

I just read a recent post of mine, and this sentence sang to me: ...living doubt-free is a given when we live by grace and by God.

I had to ponder that again...to ponder living doubt-free, which led to a mind-trip. 

I wondered if it is possible to live entirely doubt-free...the operative words being to live. I'm reasonably certain we can exist...there are hermits, singletons, loners and others who are as happy as they choose to be all alone, relatively stress free. 

It seems to me that living without people-contact, as in service to other than oneself, is virtually being the God of one's own understanding. In other words...God-less. To me, that is a life lived in unacknowledged fear.

I doubt not that allowing life to say us nay or to give us our atta girl is essential to our spiritual growth.

As an aside, it's a wonderful way to develop a sense of humor...the one God sends to guide us seems more often than not to be a less-than for Heaven's sake. Ah, lessons learned.

Don't tell me God doesn't enjoy a good grin.

Thank you.

GOD IS ALWAYS RIGHT, I

{The following is a reprint of my post of January 22, 2013.]

Truth is within ourselves and we must open out a way for the imprisoned splendour to escape. -- Robert Browning

Consider this: What if truth is just another word for kindness, patience, love, understanding, forbearance, consideration, empathy? Each is inside of us right this very minute. If not, where would we go to get them? To pray for any one or all is our ego's prayer, in effect.

The minute we recognize a need to be kind, be kind...a need to be understanding, be understanding...a need to be patient, be patient. Loose it and let it go forth from you.

I'm told that we cannot even utter the highest form of prayer...we can only receive it from within. It comes in the form of realization of that which is is perfect just as it is. Our job then is to accept that, and then learn the how of it, the why of it...in other words, we are simply looking at it from the wrong perspective (i.e., our own).

We are not always wrong, but God is always right.

Thank you.

ON WALKING INTO THE UNKNOWN

Faith is stepping off the map of what’s known and making a new road by walking into the unknown. -- Richard Rohr, "Daily Meditations," January 19, 2026

I like that quote, but I find I need remind me that making a new road begins with patience. My patience is born and bred through the need to sit and wait on the Lord.

Blinding flash...patience requires patience. 

Our need is to use it...we already have it; we just rarely use it. Our m.o. is to rush to fix a perceived problem without a thought for God's will, God's way.

There...why still more spiritual growth is our first (maybe only) requirement in life. We will be in need of still more spiritual growth three days after we are dead. Ponder that.

Blinding flash: Life is walking into the unknown...every morning as we open our eyes, we begin our daily walk into the unknown whether we realize it or not.

Faith is stepping off the map of what’s known and making a new road by walking into the unknown.

Thank you.

FREE AT LAST, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of January 26, 2014.]

[W]isdom is hidden by selfish desires.-- "Bhagavad Gita" 

If we change that ever so slightly to God's will is hidden by self-determined objectives, we have the map for our path to peace; namely, detach from our wants, open to our needs, walk free.

That is another one of those "easy to say" things...the fact is that our reasoning mind will nearly always oppose our God-determined needs, and our self-determined needs are nearly always wants that serve us...who cares if anyone else is served?

To our reasoning mind, it's a bummer that the only way to be served properly and completely is by first serving others...consciously, unconsciously, subconsciously. That's the first, last and always cause that requires us to go beyond reason...to love.

"Others" is the skeleton key that opens all our resisting doors. Because, of course, if serving others first is our conscious desire, we are not, cannot be, thinking of self.

The paradox: The ego cries, "But what about me? When will I get?" And our Soul murmurs, "Finally. I am free...I know it and I show it."

Thank you.

OUR LACK OF OPENNESS IS OUR OPENING, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of December 28, 2022.]

I have felt for a time now that I am on the verge of a breakthrough. Of what, to what, I know not, so I may well be...or not...on the verge of a breakthrough. Of a major change, I'm guessing.

Recently, I've been reading about the need for communion, for connection, for unity...and agreeing by not thinking about it.

Then I read in Fr Richard's Daily Meditation this morning: Jesus’ radical unity with the Holy One defined his life, and his prayer indicates that he wants that same radical unity to define those who follow. . . .Our lack of openness to all may very well mean our demise.

I immediately flashed that I talk Oneness but the idea of having a full-time other in my life is anathema to me...which I am very well aware of, even joke about it.

It was that closer, Our lack of openness to all may very well mean our demise, that got my attention. And not the idea of our demise in the usual sense of personal death, but in the sense of that change I have been sensing...an idea, a way of being, changing my mind without knowing my mind has been changed? Just slowing becoming aware that I'm living in a different place?

I suspect that has already happened, and I'm just getting the word.

Old saying, still true: More will be revealed.

Thank you.

MAJOR SNOWSTORM...THIS, TOO, IS GOD'S GIFT

Here's me...Saturday morning, pondering the oncoming huge, gigantic, unbelievable snowstorm with temperatures to be way below zero. 

Mentally, I was half-way dressed, preparing to go to the grocer to buy a bunch more of what I don't need when I heard the temperature...seven degrees at 4:30 AM. That changed my thinking quick, fast and in a hurry. After all, I did my panic-shopping yesterday, my thoughts can drum up "forgotten possibles" all it wants...we're going nowhere. Plus, it is said to be getting colder by the minute. 

I believe I've got everything I need...if I don't, then I don't need it. I'm going nowhere in seven-degree weather.   

I'm calling it "trusting God" with God grinning because He knows lily-livered when it shows up in his beloveds. Which gives me a grin, too. 

Facing oneself by admitting our "me" is a freedom beyond head-knowledge. It's another inside job when we are embarrassed to admit our less-than choices with no actual penalty involved. Who's to say me "nay?"

I'm missing my sister who passed away this week, and I'm feeling inordinately grateful that she got out before this frigid spell hit. Finding the good in a less-than situation...another God gift. 

Thank you.

TRUST...WE MUST GO BEYOND REASON

.... the mind of Christ still inhabits the world. -- Fr Richard Rohr, "Daily Meditations," January 23, 2026

Well, here's a comfort: I don't know, and I don't know what I don't know. 

That is the best I can do in trying to figure out where I am in my own still more spiritual growth. Ah, but the best I can do turns me to the mind of Christ, God's mind, my realized sufficiency.

I rather suspect (hope?) that's pretty much where all seekers stand. Face it, we wouldn't be seekers if we already knew The Answer. Not to get too deep into the weeds.

I take comfort in looking back where the answer to my yesterday's puzzlement is found...i.e., released. Released is when we find no self-enlightening answer, so we stop trying to "figure it out." We accept and voila it is now God's gift.

Blinding flash of the obvious: God's gift rarely comes looking like our answered prayer. 

To the reasoning mind, it's more like an unanswered prayer.

Yet, how else do we build trust? Trust, that which we have been building...or attempting to be building...all along.

We go beyond reason to God.

Thank you.

OUR NEMESIS IS OUR ANGEL, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of December 28, 2018.]

The forever lesson to learn:  To our reasoning mind, the one arousing our negative side is our nemesis...ah, but spiritually, that one is our angel.

There it is...the key to changing our mind. Then we must stay our focus on the power within which is ever on hand to further the opening, as needed.

This is an ongoing spiritual process...an opened mind releases the power for good within. Our detachment frees our thoughts from building self-determined results. That which we are resisting is freely transmuted in our mind...and we are graced with another angel in our midst.

Thank you.

PAIN TRANSFORMED...AH, PEACE

As I wrote yesterday, I'm at the place I lived in dread of in my younger years...i.e., being left all alone. With my sister's passing, I am being returned to that long-ago fear...now fact.

It is too soon to experience my unarmed feelings...I am still self-protected, and it is too soon to try for deeper. I am comforted by my long-ago decision to invite God to lead me through my life...the good, the bad and the uh-oh. 

As I write, I am realizing that pretty much everything I'm writing is from my eyebrows up. I am too deep in the sorrow of loss to begin to get cleared and/or clarified.  Ah, and that is how it needs be.

Rushing to get one's unwonderful feelings behind oneself is a self-determined objective at its strongest. We must feel our feelings at their core, or they can and will live in our core...making our decisions without our knowledge or informed consent.

To know those words is not to live them. We want to get passed the pain, but that just masks it...to rise again we know not when. 

We must feel the pain...it will transform us, peaced by grace and by God.

Thank you.

THE GRACE OF GRATITUDE

For many...women today, 'wilderness' or 'wilderness-experience'...meant standing utterly alone, in the midst of serious trouble, with only God’s support to rely upon. -- Womanist theologian Delores Williams, "Fr Richard Rohr's Daily Meditations," January20, 2026

That quote describes to a T how I am feeling today and have felt for the past days, weeks...month? I've lost count.

The welcome news to me is that I am not feeling panicked...not knowing what is to come when feeling utterly alone is a God-gift for certain-sure. I choose to believe that is the pearl we get in old age...when utterly alone is not a feeling, it is a fact!

I am the last one in my group of women still in "our" neighborhood...all the others have either moved into assisted living here on earth or in Heaven. God bless and keep them, and, not to put too fine a point on it, but God bless me, too!

I think that with a smile on my face...there's the fruit of my "still more spiritual growth." I'm at the place I lived in dread of in my younger years...i.e., being left all alone...and feeling gentle with it.

My sister, my best friend in our growing-up years...whom I depended on more than either of us knew at the time...is short breaths away from dying. We have not been close in years, but I'm living our early years memories now, and my heart is filled with painful gratitude. I "know" my sister is leaving with peace in her heart...as good as can be expected according to me.

To go with God in our heart, our soul, our body and our brain is the pearl beyond price...and that is my grateful prayer for my sister.

Thank you.

P.S. I just learned that my sister passed at 2:30 this morning. My heart is graced with gratitude for having had her in my life, and my thoughts are weeping salty tears for not having her here anymore. You were my anchor, Jane. Rest in peace knowing you were...and are...loved. 

TRUE FAITH...OUR IMPOSSIBLE DREAM

Faith is stepping off the map of what’s known and making a new road by walking into the unknown. -- Fr Richard Rohr, "Daily Meditations," January 19, 2026

I connected with the quote of Fr Richard's, but the rest of his quote, i.e., true faith is seeing a bigger circle in which we are all connected, all included, all loved, all blessed, is the equivalent of my impossible dream.

My life to date...looking back and remembering...feels perilously close to a revelation.

I do not recall ever determining that I was going to take an action whereby I would "walk into the unknown." As I look back, I can see my self-determined objective was simply to get what I wanted which I chose to believe was a need.

The first maybe half of my life "what I wanted" was what determined my actions. It was, however, "the worst thing that could ever happen to me" that lifted me...introduced me to the God of my own understanding, set me, my own mind, away from self toward Self, God...God's will, God's way.

In short, my inner self was opened to and welcomed by the God of my own understanding.

Looking back, I can appreciate my many stumbles, bumbles and feelings of unloved, unneeded, unwanted and unappreciated as determined by God for my benefit.

Today, I accept each stumble, bumble, mistake, or misstep that we make as caught by God and turned into a pearl beyond price. Our realization of that truth begins our still more spiritual growth. And repeatedly.

We are now and have ever been in God's loving care whether we know it or not.

Thank you.

UTTER POWERLESSNESS...AH, PERFECT PEACE

Our utter powerlessness in the face of our own self-will opens us to our path to God, i.e., still more spiritual growth. We seek within at an ever-deeper level in order to realize our Higher Power.

There it is, our path to peace...our utter powerlessness.

It is utter powerlessness that we resist...that we try with a will to overcome...that is our unrealized savior. It is our thinking, trying, manipulating that keeps God's will, God's way at bay. 

Face it, we can't get to God, to the Father within, by thinking. The Father within appears to us freely...unplanned, usually unrecognized and thus, from our eyebrows up, unwelcomed. 

It is that path, however, that opens us to our Father...unthinking, we experience. We experience God's will, God's way, in God's time,

We experience utter powerlessness and realize perfect peace.

Thank you.

FEAR...ON REALIZING ITS GIFT...THANK YOU

In theological terms, the story tells us that everything is grace, everything is a gift, and everything comes from God....It’s all meant to be enjoyed, if we can accept it as the gift it is. -- Father Richard Rohr, "Daily Meditations," January 15, 2026

Upon reading Fr Richard, I realize the most important part to me today is if we can accept it as the gift it is...or, not to put too fine a point on it, the most important word to me today is if.

Rearing its ugly head is dementia...again, still, oh my.

It is fairly interesting to me that I do not feel as scared as my writing indicates. Ah, but is that our dear friend denial doing my un-feeling for me?

Questions, I've got questions. 

The funny/sad part: I've got answers; I've got the right answers...all I need do is use them, live them, put them to work, daily.

Blinding flash of the obvious: This is how I put them to work daily. By wrestling with my egoic thoughts...fear dressed as real...with doubt push-pulling me all the way through to the other side.

The other side being God's will, God's way. 

Admitting unto acceptance that this way, from start unto this minute, is God's will, God's way. Comes the dawn (again): God is leading us through. 

As we walk God's will, God's way, we are unknowingly blessed to be feeling unloved, unwanted, unneeded, unappreciated. What else would press us on...push us upward into the ever-present arms of God?

God is so good to us...God is so good.

Thank you.

FEEL THE FEAR AND DO IT ANYWAY!

The following thank you prayer is from a post of mine of December 30, 2014: Thank you, God, that I want your will done in my life more than I want my own will done in my life no matter what. Open-ended. Knock yourself out, God. Do your thing. You got the power, use it....Amen

That fairly well describes me this morning...or how I'm feeling, like I've hit a brick wall and have not a clue what to do or how to do it. Not to put too fine a point on it, but I need the use of God's divine mind...now.

I am grateful that I know that is a feeling, and that whatever we are feeling, at the time is our eyebrows-up reality.

My reality this morning, then, is: Lost, alone, helpless, hopeless...wanting I know not what. Relief? Release? 

Many of my gifted truths flow to...and from...my mind. They touch me not. 

The picture blooms in my mind: Me, like a bear at hibernation time...with a want/need to find my own hidey-hole where I can curl up into a dreamless sleep and let my world pass.

To name my known cares fears: Me, with possible dementia hovering ever closer; the United States with the rigid, righteous and Right hovering ever closer; my sister at 91 with her death hovering ever closer; me left all alone...not wanting to die but afraid of living in today's world all alone.

Feel the fear and do it anyway...live! 

Thank you.

ON HEARING, OBEY...AH, A PEACED MIND

I'm feeling off this morning...off my inner sense of peace. 

I'm feeling off because my life is calling for a serious upgrade...fear of dementia is running my nervous-Nelly imagination. 

I am grateful that I know my lesson well...quite simply: Pray thank You and keep on truckin'.

This I know from my own God-led experience: Whatever comes to us, comes by way of God...as we wave ego's flag of surrender. That cannot happen without our feeling, knowing, admitting complete defeat of our own wants, hopes, ideas.

The God of my understanding whispers: Give over, give up, give in...and we are peaced. 

Ever since I heard The Word, the majority of the time...that is 51percent...I have aimed myself in that direction.

God is so good to us...God is so good.

Thank you.

LIFE IS ALWAYS FOR OUR BENEFIT...ONLY BELIEVE

God is the one through whom we are related and connected to everything. -- Brian McLaren

Here's me this morning...feeling unloved, unneeded, unwanted, unappreciated.

Lucky me...this morning I know that un feeling is just a feeling, not a fact.

I know it from feeling it long ago when I then believed it for truth. It never was, but when we're believing it, to us it is! That is the paradox of belief.

Wars are started on one's belief...which is precisely why it is imperative that we upgrade our belief. We might call it the power of positive believing.

Too often we mouth the words of belief...with our mind cowering in the corner in fear of believing.

To repeat: Lucky me for I know, from my blessedly hard-earned experience, my life is and was always for my benefit for which I thank You, Father.

Thank you.

WE MUST GO BEYOND REASON TO GOD

Per Father Richard: We have to stand in an inconspicuous, mysterious place, a place where we’re not sure that we’re sure, where we are comfortable knowing that we do not know very much at all.

I read that and an uneasy feeling crept along my spine, whispering: Isn't this where I came it? Came into my search for still more spiritual growth? When I knew naught and knowing I knew naught...almost against my own will...began to seek still more spiritual growth?

God is so good to me. I realize that had this understanding come to me earlier (which it might have), I would have missed it entirely, missed it because it does not make sense to my reasoning mind.

There's the blessing! 

That is what led me to realize the truth...we must go beyond reason to love...to God.

Feeling a tish unsettled, my heart sings: I'm on the right path, heading in the right direction. Thank You, Father.

Thank you.

LIVING BY GRACE AND BY GOD

Occasionally the opposite meaning of two well-known sayings floats through my mind...for instance, recently we must try with a will or fall by the wayside and let go and let God have been present.

In my early spiritual education, I married myself to "try with a will," but over the years and the opening of my mind, I've come to prefer "let go and let God." I suspect I prefer that one because it requires my honest effort...it's not a say it and sound good, it's a just do it.

"My honest effort" is primarily all about freeing my mind...erasing the natter-chatter. That, I'm here to shout, takes a whole lot of effort.

The effort being in not trying.

Apparently, our spiritual growth is getting free of the reasoning mind's hold on us. We don't want to lose our reasoning mind's guidance, but we can no longer rely on it. Face it, that's pretty much all we had for years...or all we knew we had.

More and more I'm feeling the assurance of guidance living within me. When that uneasy "what to do?" enters my mind, almost automatically calm enters...not the "right" answer...I don't even know the question! I am calmed by...oh, by grace and by God, of course.

There...living doubt-free is a given when we live by grace and by God.

Thank you.

THE TRANSCENDENTAL PRESENCE WITHIN, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of March 19, 2020.]

Whether we realize it (believe it, accept it, want it) or not, God is right now operating in our life...has already solved what we perceive as a problem. All our machinations to solve that problem...mentally or physically or even spiritually...are what keeps God seemingly slow on the uptake. God is never late, nor is he too slow. 

It is our wanting God to be true that is our jailhouse. Our very want is denial.

Our overriding defect of character is self which is the single thing that needs changing in this moment.  Therein lies our problem...we cannot change our own self...yet also our solution, a mystical, transcendental Presence within us that has already provided our infinite supply unto eternity.... (Joel Goldsmith, "A Parenthesis in Eternity," p 269)

Our Father made us perfect before conception. And to that we return. We have made the U-bie, we are on the journey Home, being resurrected even as we trudge the road of happy destiny.  

Let us each be the chicken soup for the soul for each other today...just for today. 

Thank you.

AWE...THE EGOIC SELF'S BYPASS

Knowledge is fostered by curiosity; wisdom is fostered by awe. Awe precedes faith; it is the root of faith. We must be guided by awe to be worthy of faith.  -- Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel, "Richard Rohr's Daily Meditations," December 19, 2025

I nearly let this quote pass on by...but I got hooked by the last sentence, We must be guided by awe to be worthy of faith. 

I'm discovering this morning that I have viewed "awe" as fitting only Disney-like stories...fun, fantabulous but fantasy pure and simple.

Interestingly, I found myself accepting Rabbi Heschel's statement without really understanding its message...until the last few words. Now I look forward to pondering the entire message. It is growing wings within me.

More, I'm getting a glimmer that this is the real nature of still more spiritual growth. If it makes no reasoning mind sense yet speaks from our soul to us...ah, there it is, the egoic self's bypass.

Thank you.

SUFFERING...GOD'S WILL, GOD'S WAY

..... it’s only through seeing God in our suffering that we can truly be free from the fear that causes us to choose ways of being that are not loving. -- Brian McLaren, "Richard Rohr's Daily Meditation," January 5, 2026

Well, there it is...the good news and the bad news as one. Suffering is not to be avoided, but it can't be self-invited either. 

Suffering needs a book all to itself. Oh, maybe that's what the Bible is...not being a Bible reader, I'm on shaky ground there. 

I quote passages from the Bible that speak to me, and there are many that do. I only inner trust the King James version, however, and truth to tell, it is virtually unreadable by me. Over the years, I've made my peace with that.

As to McLaren's quote, that is a good example of Truth speaking to my brain, my heart and my soul...all the while my egoic self is backing away from it. Face it, suffering does not come on a welcome mat.

There's the gift of sticking with still more spiritual growth...the longer we seek it, the harder the reasoning mind works to block our understanding it.... according to me.

In our material world we must trust our reasoning mind, but in our raised consciousness, we must go beyond reason to love. 

Thank you. 

SPIRITUAL GROWTH...LOVE AND LAUGH A LOT

Lest I forget: For 2026: Father Richard encourages us to find the wisdom revealed in the paradoxical nature of reality.

I'm taken by the deep meaning of Father Richard's encouraging words, to find the wisdom in the paradoxical nature of reality.

In general, I "find the wisdom" as I come to it...the wisdom finds me, in effect. There have been more than a few times when I've had to ponder, seriously study, some wisdom that I've read or heard of. But that just proves that the wisdom finds me...my way opens me as I come to Truth.

Today, I usually know where it is leading me, but back in the day, like other spiritually seeking beginners. I had to ponder hard just to let go of my own ideas of Truth, of God's will, God's way.

That tells the story of my still more spiritual growth. I started out wanting to believe...which was God's gift, not a self-determined objective. As my spiritual growth deepened, my want-to increased...again, God's will, God's way.

I am oh so grateful that I do seek the wisdom revealed in the paradoxical nature of reality. Honestly, it never would have occurred to me to see it that way. yet that puts a purer dimension to it.

My way is simply knowing that I seek still more spiritual growth...which requires getting over myself fairly regularly.

There it is another pearl beyond price: Today I love and laugh a lot.

God is so good to us...for us.

Thank you.

UNPROTECTED...SUSTAINED...LOVED

God sustains us in all things while protecting us from nothing. -- James Finley 

One of the surprising blessings in my life is turning 80 and finding a higher level of joy here. 

Few people I know...certainly not I...look forward to old age, and face it, when one reaches 80, one reaches old age. Like most of God's will for us, acceptance of life as it lands on us is the path to peace.

I used to pray for peace of mind all the while worrying about whatever crossed my unpeaced mind. Then...ah, then...I was gifted with the power of peace in thank You.

Whatever comes to our conscious mind, comes with and in spite of God's will, God's way...in particular the self-determined objectives that more often than not leave us feeling sick, sad and/or sorry. But what better way for miracles to come to be?  

That's my personal knowledge of faith...not knowing what the next minute will bring yet living the peace of welcome in my heart. 

To clarify...that's my personal eyebrows-up knowledge of faith. I achieve it as God wills...not nearly as often as I want because, of course, my will keeps pushing ahead. 

Again, I am reminded: Everything happens by invitation only.

And again: God sustains us in all things while protecting us from nothing. 

Thank you.

HEADING IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION IS SCARY, TOO

Lord, hear my prayer: Thank You.

I want to do nothing...nada...right now because I'm feeling fear.... dread.... unsure... brackish. And where did that word brackish come from? Though I must admit, it fits.

Today is Sunday so, actually, today I need do none of the things I am dreading... most all having to do with my car.

I suspect that my fear is based in the fact that I'm going to need to turn this car in sooner rather than later because of my failing eyesight.

Giving up driving...ah, is giving up my condo right behind? Moving into assisted living? I feel nothing about that, which is a sure indicator that fear is silently riding herd.

I feel dread...and who's kidding whom? Dread is just a cover-up word for fear...it stays the panic straining to get out.

This I know, and it is from personal experience that I know: No matter what I feel, think, do or say, i.e., fear....I am on the right track heading in the right direction...toward still more spiritual growth.

Lord, hear my prayer: Thank You.

Thank you.

ACCEPTING FEAR AS A FRIEND

Blinding flash of the obvious: Nothing turns us to God faster than fear.

Ah, fear then can be a friend to those who believe.

Comes now the understanding that all things work together for good...for those who believe.

Face it, when we're not feeling it, peace, love and joy require that we change our mind. And a whole new block confronts us...we finally accept that we cannot change our mind when we are convinced that we are right. 

There it is... the door to a deeper level of learning opens, and acceptance sweeps in: Acceptance that only God can change our fixed mind. The door to a deeper level of learning opens, and still more spiritual growth is its golden key. 

We are well on the road to freedom from self. Note...it's a long and rugged road, but we never walk it alone. Thank You, Father.

Thank you.

MICROSOFT...OUR NEW TEACHER

The best criticism of the bad is the practice of the good. -- Fr Richard Rohr 

Microsoft has again "improved" their system leaving that which users get to deal with. 

What a crock. 

According to me, all that their "improvements" do is require us to continuously contact them (and no doubt get charged) to question what/how/why we need to be reeducated in the use of the product they sold us originally (less than a few years ago it feels like).

I've decided to give a new way a try: To go with all the changes...to resist not.

Uh-oh! This is not new! 

This is what I've been consciously trying to use in and for my still more spiritual growth for ever so long.

In this new year 2026 I am gifted with a new same-old-same-old. We are not given something new, we are given the original to view and learn from anew...from a different angle so to speak. That's Education 101, subtitled quit your bitchin' and lean into learning.

 

God loves us so much.

Thank you.

SPIRITUAL GROWTH IS A PARADOXICAL GIFT

Father Richard encourages us to find the wisdom revealed in the paradoxical nature of reality. -- "Fr Richard Rohr Daily Meditation"

Paradox - a seemingly absurd or contradictory statement or proposition which when investigated may prove to be well founded or true.

As I look back over the past 50+ years of my life, I am convinced again that paradox is spiritual growth and is precisely how God's word grows us.

If we can explain it by "thinking it over," we're going down that wrong road again.

My life's truth is not explainable...it is an inner knowing. That has ever been the rugged road to faith without borders for me.

A throw-away truism: We can't work for it, but we can't get it without working for it.

Thank you.