FINDING OUR COMFORT WITHIN

It is only by a foundational trust in the midst of suffering, some ability to bear darkness and uncertainty, and learning to be comfortable with paradox and mystery, that you move from the first half of life to the second half. -- Fr Richard Rohr, Daily Meditation, June 13, 2016

That I stumbled onto the above quote this morning is continuing proof of God doing my thing through me. My experience yesterday at the new offices and parking building of my cardiologist tells my tale.  

Back story: I took myself to my cardiologist yesterday...to his new office in a new building with a new parking space in a new nine (or more)-story building. Needing to visit my cardiologist was not my concern...plus, finding my way into and around all the "new" was not the concern I expected it to be. 

The office building, the parking building, all the newbies are spectacular...all high-tech...higher tech than one can imagine. Example: A young man, 40-ish, asked me for directions. We hooted and hollered and had a good time with that.

Looking back, it is the interchange with other people that made it a pure gift from God. We were all fairly free in asking for and giving help. It was a joy to experience either the friendly commiseration that we hadn't broken the code yet either, or the shy pride that we had and wanted to share it...it was wonderful.

All of this is by way of saying that we can recognize our foundational trust in the midst of suffering, some ability to bear darkness and uncertainty. 

Giving our self permission to realize the drama of our little lives is of God. Face it, darkness and uncertainty visit whenever they want to. We build a foundational trust when they visit, and we don't try to change them, stop them or top them. We say our thank you, knowing God has already perfected this for our benefit. Also known as learn to be comfortable with paradox and mystery. 

There...we move from the first half of life to the second half.

God loves us so much!

Thank you.

HOPE IS OUR SPIRITUAL LIFELINE

Aging can be either a life of nostalgia or a wholehearted engagement with the future. It is a disruptive process as things break down, friends and pets die, houses are sold, and memories of the past haunt the present. Months melt into years, and we find ourselves in the flow of life. -- Franciscan Sister Ilia Delio, Fr Richard Rohr's Daily Meditation, November 13, 2023

That closely describes me today. What is delicious is the first sentence in the quote: Aging can be either a life of nostalgia or a wholehearted engagement with the future. 

I opted immediately for the wholehearted engagement with the future, and realized my flow of life today is...uh-oh. I have symptoms that fear has diagnosed as cancer (my uncontrollable cough) and heart (phlegm, a danger sign). 

I go to the cardio this morning...to a new building and new parking lot. So of course I am feeling trepidatious about the new building, the new parking lot, and the need to make a decision...should I take Lyft? or dare the new? 

My realization is that my trepidation is my wholehearted engagement with the future...this is me at 80+ and how I meet the new facts and acts of my life. 

Finding the gold in the dross: I am welcoming hope as my spiritual lifeline. I hope that I believe more wholly, trust more deeply, and accept that I have only begun to let go and let God.

Thank you.

ON FINDING OUR SELF IN GOD

The lesson in learning to pray thank you and that is all, is it does not keep any dreaded thing from happening...it brings a sort of peaceful "apprehension," and that becomes our peace. Almost our "Why worry? Be happy!" 

It is peace of mind, of finding our self in God, that keeps us from retrenching and reasserting our correctness as Fr Richard so aptly put it.

The pearl in my life has been the discovery that the dreaded thing du jour, given to God by our thank you, can in time transmute into peace...and that does indeed pass understanding.

I think of a few of the things that I am now at peace with that I once prayed so earnestly for God to remove from me...and how they are the building blocks that changed...are changing...me.

Fear has been the base for my change of mind, thus life.  My blinding flash that nothing turns me to God faster than fear changed my mind about fear. It did not remove fear but I no longer obsessively try to pray it away. 

Pray thank you and feel the grace of gratitude...change your mind, change your life.

Thank you. 

A LITTLE HAND MIRROR, II

[The following is a reprint of my post of November 21, 2012.]

So I'm talking with God this morning, and he says, "I'll tell you what you need...you need a little hand mirror to carry with you at all times. That way you'll always be able to see immediately and exactly who and what your problem is."

That was such a good idea that I immediately thought of all the people I needed to give a little hand mirror to....

Thank you.

SEEK YE FIRST....AGAIN

[The following is a slightly reworked reprint of my post of  November 8, 2015.]

The only block there can be in your channel is self. Keep that out, and know that My Spirit is flowing through. -- "God Calling," November 7

I dreamed I stumbled into King Tut's undiscovered tomb. The riches there were staggering...diamonds and emeralds and sapphires and gold...everything, everywhere. There were rarities I didn't even recognize. I understood that they had been sitting there for centuries upon centuries waiting to be discovered.

A silent voice came to me in my dream, saying, "This is how it is with the Father's treasure within you. Riches beyond your imagining just waiting to be freed. The only block is your constant digging to get to the treasure yet calling it a search for God. God is not hidden...it is your refusal to believe that he is free within you now that blinds you. Accept that...lose any thought for the gifts that will bring and be free."

Our belief that it is ours to find the Father within will ever block us...in the first place, we are relying on our own self, and in the second, we're usually going for the treasure and calling it peace of mind.

We go to God for God and that is all.

Thank you.

GOD, EINSTEIN, US...A CIRCLE OF COMPASSION

A human being is part of the whole, called by us 'universe,' a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings, as something separate from the rest -- a kind of optical delusion of consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty. -- Albert Einstein

I've read that in my Easwaran daily every November 9 since 1996...with my underlinings and highlights as proof...yet just today it bloomed as mine. Here, the fruit of the bloom: Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison...this kind of optical delusion of consciousness.

Yes! For this I have yearned...I have sought...I seek yet...to be free from this prison of delusion.

To me, this is what the November 5 Daily Meditation of Fr Richard was about: Unless and until we understand the concept of God’s unmerited favor, God’s unaccountable love, we will stay stuck in the material mind....It is, without a doubt, the key and the code to everything transformative for a raised consciousness...from the material to the spiritual.

Clearly, this is neither new nor news...I've been expounding just this since I began seeking still more spiritual growth...this is the nature of the spiritual growth I seek. 

In short, Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison...this kind of optical delusion of consciousness.

Oh, blinding flash aborning: What if my already knowing the truth of this is the freedom I continue to seek? What if, as I now suspect, my own idea of freedom is my optical delusion of consciousness? I do not consciously seek rainbows and roses, but not getting the equivalent self-determined objective, doubtless is my block.

The answer is the same as it was when first I wondered how to be a grown-up sober lady...as my beloved mentor said, "You act like a grown-up sober lady...God will do the rest."  

I do, and God does.

Thank you.

THE INVISIBLE UNKNOWN MOVES AS NEEDED

Jesus said to the host who had invited him, 'When you hold a lunch or dinner … invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind; and blessed indeed will you be because of their inability to repay you.' —Luke 14:12–14

I only quote the Bible when I agree with what it says...and that depends entirely on my rare ability to understand what it says.  

I do love the above verse though...there is nothing to not understand according to me. It puts into words my limited understanding of God's will, God's way...which is when what we are being given seems to be the opposite of what we're praying for...bingo! God's will, God's way.

The material mind is not built to understand that...spiritual mind has a tough enough time with it. We can see inviting those who cannot repay, but not because they cannot repay...and there it is, the point. 

Because they cannot repay, we can share repeatedly...a one-shot deal, as on a special occasion, does not even count. Their need for food is our need to feed. It is our inner Self that raises our consciousness and meets the need.     

I suspect this is where the miracle works of grace and God flow freely...feeding the thousands, etc. There is no way two loaves and a fish could feed a dozen much less thousands, but why quibble when we have so many honest and true examples in our own life...unexplainable but by grace and by God.

As Anne Lamott was quoted yesterday, The movement of grace in our lives...is the mystery. Some invisible unknown moves as needed, and we gratefully pray thank you.

Thank you.