Knowing Truth from the eyebrows up is essential...it is even more essential that we then let it go. "It" being our own understanding of Truth. If it isn't released from our "knowing," it becomes rote, and we start to preach the words, never realizing their ever-deeper meaning.
The conundrum is that though we made Truth ours, it is not ours to let go, it is God's to lift in order for it to grow. All the while we're trying to hold it because it was given us by God and it is ours. We must go beyond reason....
Only in looking back can we see and appreciate God's hand in it. Going through the process just feels to our reasoning mind like we must be doing it wrong. We even hear that bantered about..."If it hurts, you're doing it wrong." Not always. The hurt is usually the anxiety that change brings...change being the unknown.
When we're making our slow way upward to a deeper level, we know not what we're coming to or even if we're doing it right...this might be us going down that wrong road again, whispers our rational mind.
But we can't go back...trying that just causes more anxiety. Ah, and trying to move forward all on our own just causes more anxiety. Finally we hit the yellow brick wall...and we know, and we know we know, nothing and less than nothing. And that is good.
There it is...anxiety made clear. Anxiety is "Thy rod and Thy staff" and that "they comfort us." We can welcome anxiety with our thank you now, knowing it as proof that God is on the field...or as God's calling card.
Anxiety...God's gift of grace through gratitude.
Thank you.
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