What a yesterday my little guy and I had. Took him out at 9:00 AM before I left for my get-together, and we had just started out when a big old dog came out of nowhere and attacked him...with which two more came to join their party. Three unleashed dogs in a leash-law city with city signs stating "All dogs must be on leash" all around the place.
Long/short, the owner waded in, got Ruckus out, and leashed her dogs. I totally and completely fell apart and had to slap my hand over my own mouth to stop my screams.
I carried him back to the safety of our home, but when I put him down to walk, he could not put his left paw down. I immediately took him to the vet emergency hospital. According to the vet, he wasn't seriously hurt, x-rays show no breaks, probably strained his left shoulder/leg in trying to get away.
They gave him a pain killer, and I had such an emotional hangover that we spent the rest of the day just wrapped up with each other...him sleeping, me pondering.
I am relieved to say my first thought was not how I was going to make that woman pay for hurting my baby not to mention me, for her ignorance, for her arrogance, for just being.
My first thought was: Well, you say you have given up fighting everything and everybody...how you gonna do that here and now?
I knew that what I really wanted was for the owner to be shamed...and "be" rather than just "feel" shame. "Be" to me suggests outside, all her world knowing and shaming her..."feel" is just inside so others don't know, no one is aware but her, so she won't be mocked and shunned. There. That's my reasoning mind's perfect payback world and worst fear in this world, both together.
I let that be real to me, thanked God I realized it, and then started turning the situation around, looking for my sliver of gold.
I pulled up the Sermon in my mind and told me now's the time to walk this..."if someone slaps you upside your head, turn the other cheek" came to me. I figured that's close enough, so I started thinking of all the positive I could about the owner, and how she did calm the situation immediately. She pulled Ruckus out and held him close and comforted him while getting her dogs calm at the same time...not to mention me. How she did that is way beyond me.
I hung in with those thoughts, with my reasoning mind just dying to say "YES, BUT...." I kept pulling it back to thank You until I felt the release from payback to gratitude. What a relief.
Then, just as I was ready to walk on water, she called to say she'd be over in ten minutes to give me the check for the vet emergency care. A half hour later and she still wasn't here!...well, you can forget the Sermon when someone is late. That is a non-negotiable, unpardonable sin, according to me...apparently. I called her, and let's just say, I doubt she's ever going to be late with me again.
The need for still more spiritual growth is never ending in my world.
Thank You.
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