I'm coming to believe that it was a mistake to believe that which we learn, and learn to do, and learn to pass on, and learn to stand on...is permanent without fail as our walking around guide. No. How can it be when still more spiritual growth is the always answer up to and including three days after we're dead.
With "still more" as our entire instruction manual, we can, must and will ever be raised to a higher level deeper, and, apparently, it can, must and will feel like another crash-and-burn experience if we're doing it right. And, with each new level, we will gain a whole new book of knowledge that feels like a veritable Primer.
In short, we will be humbled.
I am first-hand learning that I cannot trust my feelings...right now. I can (because I must) trust my Father within...ah, there's the tripwire...I must trust my Father who currently feels AWOL. There. That's why I cannot trust my feelings right now. I can trust my own experience, and my own experience more than a few times has left me feeling lost, left alone, uncertain and not a bit happy about it.
Each and every time I've chosen to stay the course (thank you), and I expect to stay the course this time.
It occurs that this lifetime might not be for personal enlightenment. This life might be for the discipline of living...daily...that which I have learned, am even now learning. Ah, to live a life of care and concern for the feelings of others...learning to love others, their warts and all.
Equally important, learning unto living the fact that we will not always be heard. Here's freedom...we simply shake their dust off our feet and move on.
I can and do trust that the Father knows my needs, that God has my back, that indeed He goes before me to make the crooked places straight. I can and do walk that most of the time. Apparently it is time to up my game. It's walking it daily now...or at least more often that 51 percent of the time.
Thank you.
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