ON LEARNING HOW TO REJECT...WITH LOVE

A great teacher once told me that I needed to learn how to reject or I would never be able to accept rejection.

I understand today that rejection is simply a part of life. There are those of us who go around all but bragging that our greatest fear is fear of rejection. I wonder if that isn't just justification in order to reject first to keep from being rejected because we never learned (chose not to learn) how to make healthy choices in relationships.

The great lesson is that there is a spiritual base in rejecting...it must be done with love, with no malice or payback in our heart, nor can it have any shut-down to keep from feeling. Obviously, the spiritual base in rejecting requires conscious contact with God. The reasoning mind way allows our ego to lead and ego always legislates for itself...malice, payback and shut-down are its weapons.

In my learning how to reject, I had what I thought was a brilliant go-to phrase for letting go of those with whom there was no longer a comfortable fit...just learn to say, after chatting yet again about our discord, "Good luck, God bless, good-bye," and leave. That worked at first. I came to see that it worked because I was so afraid at first that I hung on to God and truly spoke with love.

The fact that it worked so well is exactly where and when ego slipped in, taking all credit, and my phrase became my self-determined objective with no heart, no love...just my comfort and my convenience as my goal. There is no God in that.

That it worked so well at first told me I'd best study the situation. I had to look not at the phrase, but at me...at the fact that my comfort and convenience had moved into first place. At the fact that when I first said it, I was most concerned for the other's feelings, the other's comfort. There's where God is.

It's the old lesson relearned...there are two paths for learning every one lesson...the reasoning mind, ego-victory, path and the spiritual, of God, path.

The ego-victory way can get us there, big time, and looking good...but we've always got to watch our back because the zapper will return and with mud all over it. On God's path we might not have our world envious of our victory, but our head and our heart are at peace...for God has our back.

Thank You.