OUR ANSWER IS UNKNOWABLE

Until we are led to the limits of our present game plan and find it to be insufficient, we will not search out or find our real Source. -- Fr Richard Rohr, "Daily Meditation"

I feel like I am being/have been led to the limits of my present game plan, and it feels insufficient. But what is sufficient? Just feeling good isn't it...it is, but it is way too temporary. Feeling peace, love and joy is comparable to the breeze of butterfly wings, speaking of temporary.

These feelings of mine did not start with my dear friend's recent death, but I suspect that brought them to the surface. He first felt ill around March 7, and he passed from this world on March 25. I call that grace of  God...ill just over two weeks, or just under three...which may be a good way to go since he didn't die in his sleep without feeling ill the first time. Which, no doubt, is the preference of the majority of us.

We may want to pass in our sleep without ever feeling ill, but it's likely we all want peace, love and joy without end, too. 

Maybe our serious spiritual work is to understand why that is not God's will. 

Why our "sweltering at the task" is God's perfect will. 

Why so often our very best efforts...our best spiritual efforts...wind up feeling like slung mud slowly sliding off our face...and for all our world to see.

We may find the answer. We may realize the answer. We may go out and preach the answer. But, guess what? That won't be the right answer. 

The right answer is unknowable. Until we know it. At which time, we'll be dead for three days. Or so I'm guessing.

Thank you.