It seems to me that God hears our prayers and answers them more through our less-than-wonderful behavior, our falling downs, then by our self-willing a show of purity and goodness...not that I have a boatload of first-hand experience in that area.
I do have personal knowledge of doing the right thing on purpose while holding on to mean, ornery and condemning thoughts, but, really, who doesn't?
That's where the Big U-bie comes into reality...we get to bless those ugly thoughts, and our self for having them, because they are our God-leaders. There's our u-bie, and that's the paradox. If we could rid our self of those uglies by willing them gone, we'd never go to God...he is too slow, a perfectionist if ever there was one, and he always lets the other side win, too.
However, we have finally realized and accepted that our singular want is for still more spiritual growth. There is no surer way of getting that then through humility...of which no one of us will ever have too much. Mean, ornery and spiteful thoughts are humility aborning. Get grateful.
Maybe that's how we can see our prayers get answered, by our crashing and burning with our self willed behavior. Which causes us to change or die...to change is to life in an attitude of gratitude; to die is to live a life of blame and shame.
There it is...life without a spiritual base is a life of rues, regrets and remorses. That is death in disguise.
Thank you.
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