A fairly easy to understand truism...it is not what happens to us, it is our reaction to what happens that determines our level of personal happiness. Ergo, it is our resistance to parent, spouse, friend, whomever, not the "whomever" but our very own resistance to them, that causes our unrest, our angst. The simple answer, impossible to do leaning on our unaided will, is to change our mind.
The thing about changing our mind is that we tend to forget that we need to keep it changed. Ego always legislates for itself...or, humans will ever bow to self. That's probably why we're told to pray without ceasing...or maybe just one reason why, but it's a very good one.
Focusing on God (praying without ceasing) is what quiets our mind. We've turned away from self (chaos, the razzle-dazzle of ego-wants) toward the peace that passes understanding (God, spiritual needs).
The human condition is such that when our mind is stayed on better understanding God, we are holding our "whomevers" in ego's go-cart ever ready and revved. According to me, that's ego's job...we resist it not, but we best never forget it.
It all comes down to feeling good about our self, happiness in a word. We cannot self-will our happiness, but it is a given whenever someone else is the benefactor of our thoughts, words and deeds.
The old choice between being right and being happy is easier when we realize unto acceptance that true happiness comes when we quit trying to get it and seek to give it.
Thank you.
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