LOVE, IN SPITE OF OUR SELF, LOVE

Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets. -- Matthew 22:37-40

I read that, actually I had it read to me the first time it came to me...in Sunday school class. Went over my head like a hairnet, but at six or seven most things of depth do.  But over the years, I heard it, I read it, I thought it right pretty.

When I started to live my life, religion had no part in it...nor did God nor Jesus nor fancy sounding love.

Then I found proof of God's love...he let me hit myself over the head with a two by four until I came to my senses and sought his help. To stop hitting myself over the head. With a two by four. There. That's the story of my great suffering and how I found God and Jesus and fancy sounding love.

Which to Lucy, my ego, was rarely enough. So I sought the Buddha, I discovered Joel Goldsmith, I thrilled to Thích Nhất Hạnh and oh my goodness Pema Chodran! Not to mention Eknath Easwaran, and...and...and.

I awoke one less-than-fine day, with that old something's-missing feeling in my head and heart, and I heard, "Love your God, the God of your own understanding, with all your heart, soul, body and brains, and love your neighbor...yes, the neighbor that kicked your dog and you suspect is a pedophile...love that neighbor as yourself." 

I knew my search was over. The answer, no matter the question, is love. Find a way within our own self to go deeper. To love. Continue to read all those great works, follow any and all of those great people, but never forget...they all command but one and the same thing: Love.

All this comes to me this morning because Honda is apparently determined to totally wipe my bank account clean through abuse of my automatic payments. They're working on taking a third payment from my account in one month's time, two for a car I left on their lot in March.

Does this sound like I'm reacting with love? No it does not, I'm not a total fool...but here's as good as I can get right this minute. I want to. I want to find within me the way that I can stay steady, calm and non-vindictive...to not be as nasty as I want to be. That's the juggernaut I'm resisting this morning. And, no, Lucy, I don't get a bye just because Jesus never had to deal with Honda.

Forgive me, Father, for I do know what I do.

Thank you.