Looking back to when I began my serious work, i.e., to sincerely and consciously do the Sermon, I "suffered in silence" with two friends, and unknowingly made great leaps within me...which my egoic mind still hides with self-improvement plots.
Friend One has not connected, Friend Two has semi-connected...yet my silence with Two was thought-driven, i.e., "to get God," and my silence with One has been from love...even as I have not yet grasped how love feels...or is "supposed" to feel.
My Sunday ritual is a connector/contactor to the great Immensity that Fr Richard writes of. Most often, the words I speak sound like a rank beginner's...and rightly so. Staying there may be a cop out to justify not trusting wholly to God...daring to talk but not walk.
Doesn't the quote from The Cloud, by love may He be gotten and holden, by thought never, nail it? As in, I have just admitted, first, to not yet grasping how love feels, and, second, to continuing to talk not walk. And what is that but thought in overdrive?
According to Fr Richard, a transformed person does see things in a much more expanded and compassionate way which St. Paul calls 'a spiritual revolution of the mind.'
My hope is that I'm at the start-gate to becoming a "transformed person," which is close enough for me for now. I do believe I am just where I need to be according to the God of my understanding, and I am even in my ignorance moving on up deeper. I also suspect it is my ignorance that is my blessing.
Father, hear my prayer, Thank You.
Thank you.
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