A friend from my high school years called me yesterday...I was ecstatic! Just simply terrific to hear from her, to catch the high points of each other's lives all these years later. It was a heartwarming conversation.
This morning I awoke wrapped in my rues, regrets and remorses remembering the conversation and how I had badmouthed someone from our past. Once I was fully awake I went looking for my sliver of gold that I'll need in order to build my other, or better, way of looking at my bad-mouthing.
And there it was...the realization that I needed (never for a minute wanted) to do the badmouthing because I was totally unaware that I had any hurt/anger/ugly left in me about the person from my past...the one who had indeed hurt me badly. I thought I'd long since found my part in the mess, had forgiven and forgotten and believed I'd succeeded very well.
On my well-padded knees this morning I thanked my Father for opening my eyes, and for giving me this opportunity to love my past/present tormentor....not to forgive, not to forget, just to love which encompasses forgive and forget.
I once heard someone say we must love with an open hand...that made a place in my heart, and that's how I want to love. Just to love...friends, friends-not-so-much, politicians and other prostitutes (get thee behind me, Lucy)...we all need love.
There's an old, once-popular song, the name of which I don't recall, that has the line in it, "...live, love, laugh and be happy." There. That's all we need to do to live a life free from hate.
I started this thinking that I needed to learn more about love...actually, I need to do less unlove.
Thank you.
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