The change that the Sermon asks us to make is simply to be the first to give over, be the last to take offense. When we have differences, the great canard is that we just need to talk it over. It is seldom...rare, in fact...that talking it over sets both parties free.
Talking is a useful, maybe essential, first step. It is what we do when talking goes south that matters.
There is an old saying, "You can't unring a bell." Neither can we unsay that which we didn't say in the first place! The hard lesson learning is we have no control over how we are heard. Nor how s/he interpreted what s/he heard. Talk about a wrecking ball. Wrecking friendships through words that were never said, intentions that were skewed by self-perception unrelated to original meaning.
The fix, then, is not to just talk about it, but to accept that we need to change our perspective. Specifically, we need to remember that we are in the wrong, too.
"So if someone hurts you and you are sore, you are in the wrong, too" is part of a spiritual axiom that is worth trying to live by. It links perfectly with "agree with your adversary quickly," the Sermon's great gift.
There. That's my goal...to remember if someone hurts me and I am sore, I am in the wrong, too, so that then I can agree with my adversary quickly.
Think about it...if all parties know this, there will be no disagreements to begin with. So I say let's bring this giftee into our consciousness...and live peace on earth.
Thank you.
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