The less you are bound by likes and dislikes, the more clearly you will be able to see the core of everyone, even in people who cause trouble...[there is] a phrase for difficult people: 'A lash in the eye.' ...this lash in the eye is an opportunity for learning the skills that matter most in life: patience, forgiveness, and freedom from likes and dislikes. -- Eknath Easwaran, "Words to Live By," August 13.
We not only need to divorce ourselves from our own opinions, we need to divorce ourselves from our self...our ego self.
When we know someone is judging us adversely...wrongly...we need to learn to think to ourselves, "That is not me...has nothing whatsoever to do with me. But if she needs to think it, let her...it is not mine to correct; if he needs to say it, let him...it is not mine to correct."
We can know and affirm daily that it is not us that is being judged. It is her interpretation, his out picture, her need that s/he is judging. We do not touch it, do not respond in kind to any of another's adverse words or actions else we will own the mistake...we will make it ours. (Here's where our mental "thank you" can save us a lot of angst...just keep repeating it with love in mind. It doesn't do us a lot of good to think, "Thank you, God, for this no good rotten so-and-so and his/her lies." That's just trying to have our grace and ego, too.)
When we try to correct another's mistaken judgment, that gives that judgment reality to us, and we react in anger unto resentment. It is in that itch to fight that we make our decision based on self that later (in the next instant) places us in a position to be hurt...and we lose every time by the deeper resentment that follows.
The less you are bound by likes and dislikes, the more clearly you will be able to see the core of everyone, even in people who cause trouble.
Thank you.
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