ON DISCOVERING THE TRUE SELF

Seasoned contemplatives like Thomas Merton describe letting go, letting be, letting come, and setting free as discovering the true self. -- McLaren, "Daily Meditations," August 20, 2025

There...letting go, letting be, letting come, and setting free...that may tell the tale of our seemingly unending search to live not from our head but from the Power within, the Power within each of us. The more we search out there for the Power, the farther away we take us from its discovery.

Our search is another self-determined objective, or our block. It is akin to searching for breath even as we breathe...we stop breathing, looking for our breath. Uh-oh.

We do not obtain the most precious gifts by going in search of them but by waiting for them. -- French philosopher and mystic Simone Weil

Thank you.

GOD, GRACE AND GRATITUDE

Brother Lawrence’s guidance, 'Live constantly in the experience of that sacred presence, the ground of all being.'

I gotta wonder, does the Brother's guidance include living with and within incurable illness? Incurable, as in dementia, my ongoing fear that looks like is no longer a fear but a fact. 

Let it be....

If only.

I return again to my perfect panacea, i.e., the worst thing that could ever happen to me, did happen...and turned out to be the best thing that has or can ever happen to me. 

That being true, then so can this be...another best thing. 

All it takes to turn a worst to a first is God, grace and gratitude. I have all three...now they get to earn their keep, with me remembering that their keep is mine to walk. 

I walk not alone...I walk with God, he holds my hand.

Thank you.

THE ROUGH AND RUGGED ROAD...GOD'S GIFT

Persist at that deeper place in yourself where the “both-and” is located. This is the place of the soul and the place of wisdom toward which we have to move. -- Richard Rohr, Daily Meditation, August 8, 2025 

According to me, most desires for other than still more spiritual growth are the reasoning mind want dressed up as a spiritual need. 

God's will, God's way is for our benefit always and all ways...the rockier it feels, the surer our Way. It is the rough and rugged that plows our field of resistance, i.e., self-will. 

When I was blessed with the realization that the seed of spiritual growth is in detachment...specifically, detaching from reasoning mind wants...I realized that does not negate wants, for they, too, are God given. Ah, but their place is never first in line. 

Our spiritual growth thus begins when we make a decision to turn unborn wants over to the care of a Higher Power. As they are born daily, we resist them not as we remember what we resist, persists...we leave them to God's care. 

There...that is the rough and rugged self-will plowing our field of resistance...unbeknownst to us, with God at the helm.

The good news, a.k.a., the God news: The more we detach from self's wants, the deeper our spiritual comfort grows so the more we detach.

God loves us so much.

Thank you.

RESIST NOT...MOVE IN WITH

Pure consciousness is never just me, trapped inside myself. Rather, it is an observing of “me” from a distance—from the viewing platform kindly offered by God (see Romans 8:16), which we call the Indwelling Spirit. -- Fr Richard Rohr's Daily Meditation, August 17, 2025

My morning blinding flash of the obvious: Resistance is acceptance in a hair shirt. 

Ah, it is the hair shirt that we resist. We must needs resist not but move in with, i.e., seek deeper, welcome...resist not.

To move in with is found in our still more spiritual growth...spiritually we cannot move in with as it appears to our reasoning mind eyes in the moment. Our gift is in our raised consciousness...the realization that nothing is personal to us. 

All is of God...the gold in our dreams, the worms in our fears...all in, around, between, above and below are of God and for our spiritual benefit.

Resist not evil. -- Matthew 5:39

Thank you.

IT'S ALL IN AN EXCHANGED MIND, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of August 3, 2021.]

Simone Biles is still teaching us. She competed again for the first time since she hit the wall with the Twisties, which I take to be a gymnast term for pea-green-purple petrified in the midst of a required upside-down contortion.

This being the last women's gymnastics event for this Olympics, the apparatus she got to compete on was the balance beam, known to be the hardest of all.

She won the Bronze.

I can't think any Olympic contender ever prayed to win the Bronze; yet, according to me, for Simone Biles today, her Bronze can forever be her most cherished medal.

By bowing out, simply letting go, she hung on, hung in, and hung tough, and won an Olympic medal first time back. There, that is showing the world how it's done...with God, grace and guts, the not-just-for-Sunday Trinity.

Don't tell me God's will isn't perfection wrapped in toilet paper. All we need do is change our mind, and lo! it's now toilet tissue. Love and laugh.

Thank you.

ON 'THINKING BACKWARDS' OR GOD'S WILL

Paul is dictating a letter to some people he loves on a subject he loves, expressing the honest, unedited, natural flow of his thoughts and feelings…. If we read Romans keeping these realities in mind, I think we will become more sensitive than ever to the wonderful dace of the Spirit of God and the mind of a man in the context of a community in crisis. -- "Richard Rohr's Daily Meditations," August 15, 2025

To me, this explains the gift to me of "thinking backwards" being the Way to God consciousness, i.e. the wonderful dance of the Spirit of God and the mind of a man....

My "thinking backwards" floated into my consciousness many years ago...I did not question it, nor have I over-talked the concept. To the best of my inner knowledge, I have lived it without questioning.

Not to put too fine a point on it, but my "thinking backwards" is putting the reasoning mind in its rightful place...behind my spiritual insights while ever letting it have a say in my life. God allowed our reasoning mind, too, so our job is to keep it finely tuned...ready for God to use when, if or as the need arises.

In short, this is our life today: God's will, God's way.

Thank you.

 

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@8/15/25 Brian McLaren: Paul is dictating a letter to some people he loves on a subject he loves, expressing the honest, unedited, natural flow of his thoughts and feelings…. If we read Romans keeping these realities in mind, I think we will become more sensitive than ever to the wonderful dance of the Spirit of God and the mind of a man in the context of a community in crisis. [To me, this explains the gift to me of "thinking backwards" being the Way to God consciousness, i.e.  the wonderful dance of the Spirit of God and the mind of a man....] 

RELEASE TO RECEIVE, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of August 13, 2012.]

If we are to have any lasting spiritual growth, we must learn to get closer to those who irritate us.

There is the place, that is the way we learn to live patience, forgiveness, freedom from personal wants...the either/ors, the likes/dislikes of life...freedom to love...unconditionally.

It is in letting go of protection of self...which is different from self-protection...that one finds the freedom to love...unconditionally. Until we realize unconditional love is within us right now, we will ever seek and not find unconditional love.

We must release it to receive it.

Thank you.

THANK YOU...REPEATEDLY, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of August 23, 2017.]

If I would remember any one of the following blinding flashes of the obvious, I'd never suffer another resentment:

Just because s/he is wrong doesn't mean I am right.

God has to go slow in order for me to keep up.

Acceptance is simply giving God the courtesy of letting him go first.

Thank you.

FOR THE BENEFIT OF OTHERS

A participatory theology says, 'I am being chosen, I am being led, I am being used.' After conversion, you know that your life is not about you; you are about life! You are about God. You’re an instance of both the agony and the ecstasy of God that is already happening inside of you, and all you can do is say yes to it. That’s conversion and it changes everything. -- Fr Richard Rohr, "Daily Meditations," August 12, 2025

Apparently, my spiritual growth now is in my more fully realizing that I am changed. Interesting that it seems like my change is taking me back to the untalking one I once was. 

Of course! What was our path is our path. God's will is ever guiding us as our freewill walks with us. 

It is continuing spiritual growth that lifts us up and over freewill (a.k.a., self will), only now it is to get us fret-free to the new place of God's will, God's way for the benefit of others.

Thank you.

OF GRATITUDE AND GRACE...STILL, YET, AGAIN

Father Richard teaches to become wise, we must move into life itself, encountering people and places that challenge our ways of thinking.

I sense a change in me all but fighting to get out...is the change in my active participation in my still more spiritual growth? I am not sure, but not knowing can be a cop out. I wonder if mine is not wanting to know so I can sit and wait on the Lord to do it for me.

Ah, blinding flash: He is already doing it for me...I just don't real-time realize it. 

Acceptance time again...I get to accept that I will sit and wait on the Lord because that is how I learned to live spiritual growth. And He does...lead me to the place I need to be to do the work I need to do. 

Proof of the pudding: My experience with the IRS when all my business partners split, and I got the gift of paying off the bankruptcy. That is not an exaggeration, and I am still grateful.

My younger years' fear was of being bored; my elder years' fact is that bored does not enter still more spiritual growth...another gift of gratitude.

Thank you.

I AM THE BEING OF ALL SAINTS, ALL SINNERS, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of August 9, 2020.]

Blinding flash of the obvious: I am the wolf stalking the night...I am the skunk stinking up the place.

Thoughts flow:  I am the wolf stalking the night...I am the skunk stinking up the place. I am the lion whose roar reverberates across the Serengeti...I am the jackal doing the dirt, carrying the water.
I am the soul of my most revered saint, I am the conscience of my most resented enemy...I am the Being of all the saints and sinners in between.

Parents, siblings, friends, enemies, The Church, the employer, lost loves...none get the credit, none get the blame...for each is the wolf stalking the night, the skunk stinking up the place...just as I am.

I Am that I am.

Thank you.

OUR JOURNEY AWAY FROM SELF BEGINS, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of December 4, 2021.]

Matthew 5:38 Ye have heard that it hath been said, An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth: 39 But I say unto you, That ye resist not evil: but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also. 40 And if any man will sue thee at the law, and take away thy coat, let him have thy cloak also.

Matthew 5:38, 39, 40 are my "forever" verses that I love, but oh the doing of them...there's my mare's nest.

We are told that God loves a seeker, so we can know we are loved; but, face it, God loves a non-seeker too. Wait...what's the "but" about that? God loves. We just need to accept that without any "buts."

The wonder is that it is easier to accept God's love by doing God's will, as in, resist not evil, turn the other cheek, etc., than by staying with the reasoning mind birthing our analytical mind trips.

Blinding flash of the obvious: It is our not doing that which God wills, specifically, resist not evil, turn the other cheek, etc., that keeps us from accepting (trusting!) God's love.

This acceptance is our turning point. This is where our transcendent journey, our journey away from self, begins.

Thank you.

WISDOM IS WITHIN

Father Richard teaches that to become wise, we must move into life itself, encountering people and places that challenge our ways of thinking. *** Persist at that deeper place in yourself where the both-and' is located. This is the place of the soul and the place of wisdom toward which we have to move.

I wonder if all desire for other than still more spiritual growth isn't a desire for a self-determined objective no matter how prettied-up the "other" seems to us.

I heard me say today, I wish I were in love again, and I realized that underneath what I really wish is that I knew love...I really don't have a clue. Blinding flash: I wonder if anybody truly does...know love. Well, there I go down that wrong road again...overanalyzing. 

Our lesson for today: God's will, God's way is for our benefit always and all ways...the rockier it feels, the smoother our Way...it is rough and rugged that plows our field of resistance, i.e., self-will. 

We need to recognize that, among other things, the real purpose of self is to move into life itself to encounter people and places that challenge our ways of thinking. Ah...still more spiritual growth.

Thank you.

THE GRACE OF GOD, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of February 24, 2013.]

The grace of God is a wind which is always blowing. -- Sri Ramakrishna

We cannot get the grace of God...we can only give in to the grace of God.

Thank you.

SCRUPULOSITY...WHAT A HOOT!, I

[The following is a reprint of my post of August 23, 2016.]

The literal level is one of the least fruitful levels of meaning....A heart open to the power of metaphor ("that which carries you across"), a heart open to the feminine and open to intimacy, will leap every time. A heart trapped in historical literalism, or closed to the power of poetry, will remain bored, reactive, and trapped in critique. -- Fr. Richard Rohr, "Daily Meditation," September 28, 2015

That, I believe, defines those of us who talk in exaggeration. We are poets, weaving fun in and out of the daily-ness of life. Which reminds me of the point made in The Cloud of Unknowing by an unknown 14th century monk to "be wary of the overly scrupulous."

The overly scrupulous use a one-inch yardstick to measure us by...and our saving grace is we let them because that's the stuff we use to weave our fun when telling of it.

God loves you and me so much...and the overly scrupulous, too.

Thank you.

BLESSED BEYOND HUMAN MEANS

The following is from CAC faculty emerita Cynthia Bourgeault and speaks to me of raised consciousness...raised without our personal thoughts or actions...raised through higher consciousness itself:

 

 ...he stayed close to the ground of wisdom: the transformation of human consciousness. He asked those timeless and deeply personal questions: What does it mean to die before you die? How do you go about losing your little life to find the bigger one? Is it possible to live on this planet with a generosity, abundance, fearlessness, and beauty that mirror Divine Being itself? These are the wisdom questions....

There it is...the ground of wisdom: the transformation of human consciousness. That is the pearl I have been seeking, chasing in fact, since I began my spiritual journey August 24, 1971. 

Gratefully, I seek still, and I expect that to be so until three days after I am dead if...no, since...I am blessed beyond human means.

Thank you.

DOUBTS AND FEARS ARE GOD'S WILL, GOD'S WAY

The following is from my journal...I believe that I need to realize this as more implicit directions, i.e., God's will, God's way:

From July 10th entry: Quoting Rabbi Dr. Shmuly Yanklowitz: The prophet is neither cool nor popular; the prophet is not the life of the party. The prophet is an anxious personality juggling the demands of God with the needs of humans. Constantly risking alienation or even death, the prophet is isolated and lonely. But we are not allowed to turn away. 

From my entry today, 8/3/25: What if I am the prophet? Ah, blinding flash of the obvious: I am MY prophet...I am neither cool nor popular; I am not the life of the party. I am an anxious personality juggling the demands of God with the needs of humans. Constantly risking alienation or even death, I am isolated and lonely. But I am not allowed to turn away. 

That for sure describes my upside down, inside out feelings since 3:00 AM, April 30th. Still, I move forward...forward with doubts, fears, what-ifs ringing in my head.

I take comfort in a long-ago blinding flash: I cannot know God's will, God's way before it is time for me to know, and my trust must come in living that...ah, with doubts, fears, what-ifs ringing in my head. Apparently.

Thank you.

T0 SPARK OUR CONSCIOUSNESS

The study of truth is the smallest part of our life's demonstration. Far too many students study too much. It takes a very small statement of truth to spark our consciousness into action, and it is that action that brings about the development of our spiritual consciousness. It is not what we read that does it,; it is what we do with what we read that does it. -- Joel Goldsmith, "Consciousness Is What I Am," pp 67-68

Thank you.

LORD, HEAR MY PRAYER

I am feeling...nada. Nothingness. An off-and-on headache. A free-floating fear underlying me. Sleepy...uh-oh.

Comes now my secret mantra...we must try with a will or fall by the wayside. 

I feel like I'm running on empty...a feeling is not a fact, thank you very much. 

Geez, I am deep in this blah, so much so that I'm starting to consider getting a cat...two cats. Seriously. Even mentioned it to another person recently but only conversationally, I thought. Which...if God loves me...will be as far as I get with that. 

Face it...this is fear of dementia...might as well spit it out, let it strut its stuff. If this is dementia, it'll strut its stuff without a by-your-leave from me. I note I'm still "if'ing" it. And I will until I get to where I need be...God's will, God's way.

Whether I feel it or not, whether I know it or not, I am held up by His everlasting love...we all are. If Since that be true, use it, rely on it, Let It Be. 

Try with a will or ball by the wayside.

Thank you.