We study, we seek, we search, we pray...we want to know God's will in order to do God's will.
We can study, seek, search, pray till our face falls off...we are still headed down that rough and rutted road of self-determined objectives, and we will be until we realize the truth in the quiet word we got way long ago: Unknowing.
The road to God is the Way of Unknowing.
We once heard and, if only from our eyebrows up, accepted that as true. Like most of God's stuff, it doesn't start out making a lick of sense so it slips away fairly quickly. But today I appreciate that this is where I have been brought to...again. Having come through my dark and stormy fifteen minutes of arm-wrestling with the devil...or my I See Me/ego...I am peaced in not knowing.
Who knew? Knowing I know naught, I feel the peace I sought through the storm.
It is true, I've got opinions up the gump-stump and even more facts to back them up, but I know nothing...and I know I am a long way from Unknowing, the taproot of spiritual growth. All on the spiritual plane, unfathomable to the reasoning mind, is unseeable, untouchable...unprovable standing alone. It requires a Higher Power to transmit it. According to me.
To compound the senselessness of reason in spiritual growth, we come to realize that all of that studying and praying is essential. It is that rough and rutted wrong road that brings us to the U-bie that turns us back to God...proving Fr Richard right again: We don't get to God by doing it right, we get to God by doing it wrong.
Now we're at the conundrum: How do we get to Unknowing by not thinking on it? That may be the inner message staying ourself in Now and Trust. The God we trust we believe in is only in the Now, meaning there are more rough and rutted roads ahead. We will walk them if we're doing it right...or wrong for that matter.
Yes! Maybe better, I don't know.
Thank you.
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