Interesting times. Interesting coming from the unknowns of this pandemic. I find myself being turned back to my earliest lessons...from whence came my spiritual primer.
In my spiritual primer everything shows itself to be a disguise: weakness is really strength, wisdom is really foolishness, death is really life, matter is really spirit, religion is often slavery, and sin itself is actually the trapdoor into salvation. [From a description of Saint Paul's teachings of mirror vision.]
My spiritual primer is based entirely on my crash-and-burn experience, i.e., the worst thing that could ever happen to me has shown itself to be my gift of God and grace, and I can never be grateful enough.
For a short while now, I have been more or less observing the birth of interesting mental gyrations in me...coming as rues, regrets and remorses. Remorses are often the invite to my mental gyrations but since they are the primer that taught me the grace of gratitude, I resist them not today.
In these times that are so trying to the reasoning mind, I'm mentally finding overlooked defects, little offshoots of the biggies that were healed long ago. I choose to believe (and who's to say me nay?) the twinges I'm feeling are from God's tweezers plucking out those teeny-tinys, and my ego, Lucy With the Football, is determined to fix by plucking them out with pliers. And there it is, the birth of still more rues, regrets and remorses, i.e., the pain.
I find my peace in a segment from Rohr's "Daily Meditation" today by Cynthia Bourgeault: However far any one of us is destined to travel on this wilderness journey, learning to lean into the diminishment, to live with paradox and unknowing, and to celebrate the creativity without dissociating from the pain are all vital survival skills as we humans collectively feel our way into the new beginning.
Thank you.
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