REMEMBER TO DO THE LOVE YOU RECEIVE

I had two quite different experiences yesterday...one of incoming ugly and one of incoming love.

First, the ugly: I was at lunch with several people. A friend and I were at the end of the table, seated across from each other. The two people next to us literally turned their seats away from us and talked with the others at the table the entire time. We were never included unless we threw a remark or a question up and over. Another lady seated down the table told an incredibly hurtful story about two others (who, of course, were not present). She excused her story by saying the unkind remarks originally made "had just fallen out of her lips without forethought." But she told this disparaging story to people who had no need to know...and with forethought. 

I am exercising not taking the behavior of the first two personally because it says nothing at all about me. My insight is in understanding why the other lady would break bad with such a mean-spirited  story. The reason, it seems to me, is that ugly begets ugly. Specifically, whether she consciously realized it or not, she was in the presence of uncivil behavior. If we do not in some way address that incivility, it will inform our behavior. Plain speak: It will do our thinking, our acting, for us as the rude behavior of the two did through her.

Second, and best part, the love: Before lunch, a lady I know but am not close with, came up, and, kinda stuttering, said she had an offer to make me: She'd heard me say that I'd love to visit my hometown one last time but this and that were making it unlikely to happen. So, she was offering to drive me to my hometown (an eight-hour drive!) in the Fall, that she'd make herself scarce while I visited friends, etc. I am beyond touched at such a straight up example of love, such heart-generosity...gobsmacked fits here. 

It is worth noting...and not forgetting...how ugly spreads like spilled ink on a white tablecloth...p.d.q. with no good following. Then, how love takes its own sweet time...it spreads by growing up and out. I know the offer-er will continue to show forth love, I will have her example to follow and share with others who, no doubt, will catch the fever and show it forth. Ugly just leaves a stain.

My goal today is to stay my memory on the love...and pass it on. Equally important, I want to not forget that ugly does beget ugly, to not forget the less-than-wonderful behavior I experienced...and not pass it on.

Thank you.