To develop a healthy ego, * * * we must know we’re special and find a place where we are loved and where we belong without needing to prove ourselves. - Fr. Richard Rohr, "Daily Meditation," November 27, 2016
As I mentally toyed with Saint Bernard's quote, I remembered Rohr's healthy ego quote. And it was Bingo! night in my head. Love. To develop a healthy ego, love. To know we're special, love. Love outward and inward. Love inward and outward. Love.
In order to love, though, we must needs give up the game of exactly how do we love this? Or that? Or him, her, them? In order to love, practice loving...i.e., nonresistance.
That's been my inside-exercise for awhile now. I chose the most unlovable person in my own personal Book of Judgments on whom to practice loving. No. My self-judged "most unlovable person" chose me. Repeatedly. This is one who is less than enchanted with me...or did I need explain that?
So I've been practicing in secret...as in, I'm not giving her/him cards or compliments, little giftees or big grins...just being courteous, actually. The hard, and I am talking tough!, part is mentally...thinking kind thoughts, projecting loving kindness toward a pickle-pain is no easy matter.
It's a good thing I'm welcome in God's world because I'm there a lot with this one. The good, jump-up-and-shout good news is I don't feel particularly hard toward him...I have softer edges in my mind when I think of her, and my heart doesn't burp acid either.
The LOL realization why this is so difficult for me is that I'm not allowed to say anything...to explain, to sway her opinion, his thoughts.
Everything...meaning life...really is simple. It's when we ponder it, think on it, analyze it (and who ever pondered without analyzing?) that life seems difficult to our mind's eye. It's when we forget who is really in charge of life itself that we find our self seeking help from that very one.
And God just laughs....
Thank you.
No comments:
Post a Comment