GETTING READY/BEING READY

I have long believed that forgiveness is not something we can do...it is God's perfect work. However, God's perfect work is never going to get done without our imperfect cooperation. There is always our free will (God's paradoxical gift to us) to stand in our way or open the door of willingness depending on whether we are ready...ready to get over our own self.

I believe forgiveness is of God, but getting from his heart into mine is like unto the rough road to Calvary. It is "ready" that's the bramble bush. We've all heard the definition of the difference between willing and ready. We can be willing right this very red-hot minute to go to Paris, but there's a lot to do before we're ready...current passport, pack, notify work, friends and neighbors, etc.

Now we've gotten to the meat of the matter...getting ready to forgive. If we're even thinking that we want to forgive a personal wrong-doer, we're most likely in the wrong pew. Get out of there. Move on up to hopeless...up there where we are aware and fully aware that we are stabbing our own heart with hate. We see that we cannot help our self, and it is not even a major matter we're needing to forgive...but s/he did it to me with malice aforethought and it's not fair and if I give over s/he'll think I'm giving in and I'm not because I am right and it's not fair and it's not that s/he'll win but that I'll lose and everyone will know it and laugh at me and it's not fair.

This is known as getting ready. With an almost physical act of will we drag our thoughts back to God, to the things of God like roses and rainbows and puppies and peanuts. And we know we are helpless and hopeless to forgive that silly little act of no real account, but it was deliberately spiteful...and it's not fair and if I give over s/he'll think I'm giving in and I'm not because I am right and it's not fair and it's not that s/he'll win but that I'll lose and everyone will know it and laugh at me and it's not fair.

Still getting ready.

We never know the hour or day that the Bridegroom will come. That or something like it is somewhere in the Bible. It took me a long time arm-wrestling with my own ego before I got a glimmer of its meaning which I understand to mean when we've lost our battle with our ego (we sincerely want to get over our self but cannot), in that instant God (the Bridegroom) will come and set us free. That may or may not be the Bible's meaning, but it gives me peace so I go with it.

It is all that ego-wrestling that is our getting ready because the Bridegroom does not come to the unready. God alone knows when we are ready, and in that instant, we are loosed by love. We know it and we show it.

The underlying/overriding rule: Always be ready.

Thank you.

THE CONSCIOUSNESS OF GOOD

It is my contention that we find it hard to believe we are on the right track going in the right direction when the blocks that slow or stop our spiritual growth seem so real. They seem so real because they hurt. It is a hard lesson learning that hurt does not necessarily indicate wrong. When we stumble or fall, it hurts so deeply we think this cannot be right. But it is the hurt, the very suffering, that is our gold for the very reason that that is what assures us we are in need of our Father.

We detach our thoughts from the hurt with a simple "thank you," which lifts our thoughts to our Father... our reasoning mind is refocused on God and the things of God, and God's will manifests.

Our freedom from self begins when we realize our hurt as the claws of our ego-victory mind holding to its self-determined objectives. Ego has very sharp talons...God has a greater emery board.

Of course, none of this is possible without a consciousness of good, the why of our daily meditation and quiet time.

The most important step is the attainment of the consciousness of good, and then [all good] unfolds as an aftermath. -- Joel Goldsmith, "The Heart of Mysticism," p. 1231 

Thank you.

APPRECIATE THE BLOOM, LOVE THE SEED

According to Easwaran, if we are ever to be truly secure, we must begin to find a source of security within ourselves.

Many of us have sought peace of mind, with never a clear idea of what that felt like...I remember when I finally realized my idea of peace of mind was virtually the same as my idea of a lobotomy. No rues, regrets, remorses, guilt, shame, pain...hard to hate, huh? No kind, considerate, lovable, generous, interested, joyous either which was even harder to love.

What we ignore (mainly because it feels too daring to believe unto acceptance) is that we have peace of mind whenever we chose to use it. Like the security Easwaran refers to, it is within us right now.

We get off track from the get-go...at the beginning of our search...by prizing the pretty bloom rather than the hardy seed. We must needs begin searching for the source...which is within us.

We look out there for peace of mind, for security, for love...most often praying to God to give it to us, grace us with it (and a hundred other pretty and prettier words). We are seeking that which we already have, but we are unaware (more like disbelieving) of it.

It is within us, was with us at birth, has been there, right there within us, all along. Detach from our wants and give thanks for our needs which have already been fulfilled. There. We begin to know security.

Loose it and let it go.

Thank you.

P.S. Hallelujah! Great God Almighty! God is good...Roger has won his 18th! Now, to fulfill my end of the bargain...to think, all I need do is think good and kind thoughts about our president. Holy moly.

LUCY'S ON PARADE

In a there-is-no-such-thing-as-sin world (only ego-victory, ergo wrong, choices), it is a sin to bargain with God. God knows what the world needs, what each and every soul in the world needs, and God fulfills each need. This I believe.

If Roger Federer would win the Australian Open tomorrow, I would never, never, never complain about the outcome of the 2016 presidential election again. Honest.

Thank you.

OUR SMALL WORLD...LOVE IT OR LOVE IT

It's a small world after all.

It seems my world consists of my Father, me and my ego Lucy.  That order is mix-and-matchable at any given time.

The joy of my life is that the majority of the time today (the majority being 51%) I realize my Father as ever in front of Lucy and me. This happens often enough in my conscious awareness for me to know my Father is always on the field. He is in charge and utterly amused at Lucy, ever scrambling for first place...and at me when I take her seriously.

It's a sobering fact that that may be the measure of my spiritual growth, the fact that Lucy cracks me up, too, in her maneuvering up there in my own head. There was a time when I took that as a deadly serious matter, believing I needed to take charge, get in control, manage...or die trying.

Imagine my astonishment when I was graced with the realization that all I need do is love and laugh with you, me, my ego Lucy...and love the Father as myself.

We are One...it is a small world after all.

Thank you.

WE NEED LIVING COMMUNITIES

It is said that going it alone in spiritual matters is dangerous, but, according to me for me, going it alone is dangerous period. I say that is for me because all alone is my great comfort and being left all alone is my great fear.

Fr Richard Rohr wrote this morning that we need living communities to keep us accountable, growing, and honest. Yes, and yes again. However, just agreeing with that keeps it on the "pretty words" level. It is a hard fact to grasp but alone is terribly inviting when our world is out of step with us. (Which tells its own tale.) That's when we learn that keeping our self accountable all alone is virtually impossible.

Recognized mystics and spiritually advanced intuitives may have a crack at it, but those folks must be recognized and anointed by someone else...to recognize and anoint one self as such is heading on out to the funny farm...who's kidding whom?

Proving the fact that trying to keep our self accountable all alone is impossible is a lesson we learn only after the fact...when we've had to turn for help to God who, of course, turns us over to others.

And there it is, another paradox: We seek to be alone and turn to God for help; he turns us over to others...where we find the peace we sought in all alone. 

The Father knows our needs.

Thank you.

MORAL OUTRAGE...EGO ON PARADE

Justified anger for socially acceptable...no, morally demanding...reasons is the devil's hidey-hole. I read once in a Rohr book that moral outrage is ego generated.

This came to mind yesterday when I talked with a friend who told me of an older man who has set himself up as a mentor for a much younger, newly divorced woman whose son recently committed suicide. This is a hurting woman. My friend was beyond outraged, had set the older man straight to his face...in all caps with exclamation points galore.

He was not happy, he has not changed; my friend is not happy, she is looking for an "atta girl" or three. I made listening noises. In the face of another's rampaging ego, we do well to rely on the old adage, don't throw your pearls before swine.

We need to keep our self detached from personalizing the situation by thinking of "the Rohr concept" and not the a-hole or the a-hole's behavior. Knowing that moral outrage is ego generated is useful to us only if we realize its truth by experiencing it. Turning our thoughts to love, whether that love be rainbows or roses, turns our thoughts away from ego's outrage, and lets God out to do his cleanup work.

Oh by the way, and more importantly, just believing  "Rohr's concept" is truth because it rings true, but never realizing that truth through our own experience, is useful only in setting someone else straight when they are into moral outrage...and that is not useful.

Thank you.

THE SECURITY OF POWERLESS

According to me, powerless is a paradox. Few of us just plain walking around folk hope to be powerless. The image of being at the mercy of our worst fear springs to mind when we see our self as powerless. Who prays for that?

There's a school of thought that says we get our power back when we throw in with God, but I think that's just an alternative fact...it assures us we can at some point have our own power. To me, that's a shill for self-protection.

When we throw in with God, we get faith upon which we must needs build...every day and every way. Faith in and of itself is not power, nor does it impart power...it imparts reliance on a power greater than, but within, our own self.

Powerless is to be prayed for with a "thank you." Whatever comes into our life...wearing horns and carrying a pitchfork or soaring on the wings of a dove...the only thought we need have is, "This, too, is God's...thank you."

That is to know the security of powerless.

Thank you.

LET IT BE, OH LET IT BE

How mistakes are made: By relying on our own memory or our own interpretation of a memory. 

I've been very grateful that we haven't had a snowfall to speak of this winter...just like last winter, two years in a row, praise the Lord, I'm thinking.

I was reading my "God Calling" yesterday, January 22, and there in my very own writing, "'16 - great blizzard begins at 1 PM." Proof of my unbelieving the written word (no matter it is my handwritten word), I was certain "2016" was a mistake...that I'd mistakenly written "'16." 

Imagine my surprise when I read on this day, the 23rd, and in my own handwriting, "'16 - already 15" here at 5:30 AM."

I make this point for my own sake. I think of the many times I've doubted someone's word because it didn't match up with what I "knew" to be true. The fact is, very likely both of us were misremembering the actuality.

Life is a learning lab for giving over...forgiving, in a word. Why do we fight being a forgiving person, being a giving-over person (especially in the ego-victory matters) when that...forgiving...is the yellow-brick road to happy, joyous and free?

Loose it and let it go. - somewhere in the Bible

Thank you.

WE ARE NOT SAINTS

I had a blinding flash of the obvious many years ago. It was about a friend who is Catholic who is wedded heart, soul, body and brains to the cruel and unusual teachings of the nuns when she was young and to what that did to her. In that flash, I realized that it is her pride in that long-ago awfulness that causes her pain today. She refuses to detach from the unfairness of it all...to hug it and kiss it and let it go.

This came to mind Friday with flashing lights, its own band and my prideful ego Lucy dancing to "My Way."

There is no fact in my despair, there is only pride in my despair...I feel worse than you do. And I'm going to for the next four years. Because.

The next four years are going to be fodder for my laughter. My only job is and will be to divorce myself from my black humor for that is pride in hiding. Find the gold, love and laugh.

Grey humor is okay though...I mean, why set an unreachable bar?

Thank you.

SNARK IS SILENCED BY LOVE

I love it so much when my meditation, my "God Calling" and my Fr. Richard Rohr readings all speak the same message to me.

This morning my meditation began with my thoughts of an e-mail from a friend that I got yesterday. The e-message ran right along the edge of snark, and I was pondering how to lovingly return to sender. Thankfully, God directed my attention elsewhere...he's clever like that.

After my meditation, I picked up my "God Calling," and there was a note I wrote to me on this date in 2005: When I am thinking of 'loving' words to say to set anyone straight, I am living in my reasoning mind.

That note reminded me that when I'm trying for loving thoughts to think or loving words to say in order to set someone straight, I'm stuck in my ego-victory mind. My ego Lucy calls it praying but who's kidding whom? The end result is the teller of the tale...resistance is not ever going to be about still more spiritual growth, and setting another straight is resistance plain and simple.

Then I went to Fr. Richard Rohr's "Daily Meditation," and the first thing I read was: Abba Poemen said, 'Teach your mouth to say what is in your heart.'

There's my answer...we go to our heart for loving thoughts and words. Our heart is that space within where stillness lives so that God can make himself heard. And snark is silenced by love.

Thank you.

HUMILITY...ALL IS WELL

Humility. For whatever reason, examples of humility are coming to me a lot these days.

I pray for Pope Francis every day purely and simply because he asked it of us. I was watching him on television when he was visiting Washington, DC.  A man in the crowd reached out to touch him, and he grasped the man's hand and urgently asked...begged really...the man to pray for him. Of course, this total stranger agreed, but the Pope continued to beseech him, "Will you?" he asked, "Will you pray for me?"

I feel certain sure that he was asking for the prayers of each and all of us who were watching him on TV at that time...and I felt moved. I knew that to be an act of humility beyond my ken. I mean, he's the POPE, and there he is on nationwide hook-up asking a stranger on a street corner and a few million others to pray for him!  Now that is humility.

And then there's Mrs. Robinson, Michelle Obama's mother, the President of the United States's mother-in-law. We never hear about her. Except when the President was inaugurated in 2009, and it was announced that she would be moving into the White House with the Obamas for the two girls, we've rarely heard a word about her. I took no note of this until the President's big farewell speech recently when he was thanking so many individuals who had been more than helpful to him. There she was sitting on the front row and not a word did he mention about her. We had to know this was per her request. I mean, she's his mother-in-law, and he's no fool. Again, I was moved, and I had to believe there, too, is humility.

It has occurred to me that the direction to "Humbly ask God to..." is telling us to pray, "Thank you, Father, for...." We can then rest in the knowledge that he knows the rest of the sentence and has already taken care of it. If we're still believing we need to spell anything out for God before God will get it...well.  Enough said?

That may be our jumping-off place for doing humility. Thank him instead of ask him, and rest knowing he's got it covered...all is well.

All is well. All is well. All is well with my soul.

Thank you.

IT TAKES A LIFETIME

The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want. I felt like I'd been slapped upside my head with that sentence this morning...the "I shall not want" part. There it is in the very first sentence of the 23rd Psalm: I shall not want.

Here's me, dancing with Mother Mary and my defects and missing that. To realize, not just agree with or know from my eyebrows up or hope, but to realize the Lord is my Shepherd therefore I shall never be in want is the recipe for the peace we seek.

Then I go on to read in today's "God Calling," It means much to Me to be understood, and the understanding of Me will bring great joy to you.

I know the Lord is working overtime this morning because my next read twines those two and takes me deeper into a higher place. Per my Easwaran, It takes a lifetime to learn to love....It grows little by little every day, by bearing with people...even to the edge of doom.

And it all came together in something Joel Goldsmith had written...that the fruitage from our inner conscious contact is not just the harmony we receive but the harmonies that we are able to bring to others.

None of my readings refers to getting gold or glory or even personal (i.e., ego) happiness. They are all about attaining God consciousness for the benefit of others, from which we receive great joy.

And again, almost against our will, we realize that spiritual growth is never about getting, it is always about giving...from which we get.

Seek ye first the kingdom of Heaven and all these things will be added unto you.

Thank you.

FORGIVE...LOVE...GET HAPPY...LAUGH

In order to forgive, we must first love...the offender, not the offense. As long as we conflate the offender and the offense, the offender will remain unforgivable. The offense may well be unforgivable, but the offender must be released. Both for the offender's sake and for our own.

Going deeper, we discover that in order to love the offender, we must first become willing to love without restrictions, without boundaries...and this is a real toughie. It feels like trying to get a hug from a cement block.

Fortunately, our goal is for still more spiritual growth, and we begin to understand our inner block is nothing more nor less than our ego. We see that block as our own angry hurt which fills an ego-need, and it gets us too much for us to just release it...too much pity (which we swear we do not want); too much sham understanding from others (which is the Miracle-Gro for their contempt); too much self in a word, meaning no God a'tall.

We realize that all our hurt, anger, judgments...defects of character...are fear, which is ego-based and ego-driven and impossible to release just because we "know better." Fear in any and all of its forms serves naught but self, and self cannot be served at the expense of another. Again we come to the answer...give it up. Forgive.

And there it is. We hand it over to the God of our own understanding. In the handing over, we take his hand and walk free in love and laughter.

God loves us...pass it on.

Thank you.

LEARNING TO LOVE...EGOLESSLY

The fact weighs heavy on me that I have all the spiritual learning that I am ever going to need...and still I do it so poorly.

I have had my full measure of spiritual learning from the time first I heard and believed: God loves me. He loves the one I less than love just as much as he loves me. I must, too. And, finally, I must return his love to him...equally and in full measure.

The reason the fact weighs heavy on me is that I'm forgetting that is God's job. It is God who is love, God who lives within us and loves through us, as us, for us...in spite of us.

And Lucy frowns. There it is. That is my job...keeping Lucy reined in. With love. Trying to rein in our ego by use of anger, hate or tears is slip-sliding down that wrong road again.

It's all in love God wholly and completely, and love equally all others...including our own self.

That is the sum and substance of spiritual growth, and still more spiritual growth, according to me.

Thank you.

AGAIN: GO BEYOND REASON TO LOVE

[The following is a reworked reprint of my blog of June 13, 2012.]

Let no unkind thoughts of any dwell in your hearts...."God Calling," June 13

Once we've learned to discipline our tongue, our thoughts are the next (seemingly impossible) hurdle to clear.

The very first unkind thought must be considered our "danger - do not enter" sign. We can be grateful for that one, as opposed to beating ourselves up for it, thus staying stuck there. It's our angel telling us to turn around immediately if not sooner, to go to another thought altogether. I like the thought of a lily of the valley, how it grows...or puppy dogs, good friends...any happy thought will work.

Staying at the danger zone, trying to think our way out of it, is akin to walking too close to quicksand just to feel the frisson of the forbidden...before we know it, we're up to our knees in ugly and sinking fast.

We assume that the reason it is essential to discipline our thoughts is to be reasonably happy in life. The real reason, though, is to make maximum use our faculties in order to contribute to life in the service of others. Then we go beyond reasonably happy...to love.

Thank you.

ON BECOMING ONED

Seek. That is the reason we are born...to seek and to find our own star.

To be a seeker, we first must know, then realize, what it is that we seek. Our reasoning mind is how we learn, how we come to know, but we must go to our Soul for realization.

Some seek wealth, others health, still others the love of another human being. I suspect we all start out seeking one of those or something like it...that's probably how we are surprised to learn we're looking in the wrong direction. It's like getting on an elevator, expecting to go horizontally...being surprised when we go up/down instead of to our left/right.

I'm a believer that all roads lead to God...we each must head in the direction we're called to and shuck our shields as we go, learning and leaning more toward the unknown than the known. Some of us take a road straight down into hell...some head neither up nor down, just keep moving forward...some few from the first head upward.

Many of those who become intimate with the fires learn the uselessness of self-will and are graced with surrender.

Those who walk forward, only forward, are a study in that old rocking chair syndrome...going back and forth, back and forth,  sincerely believing they're getting somewhere. Going forward, only forward, ensures they'll not make a mistake, but they won't get anywhere either.

Those few from the first who head upward will have to speak for themselves...I've never known any.

All this is by way of saying that we each determine how many lifetimes our journey will take. I suspect those who do good for the singular purpose of cutting short their journey will have a long, fairly boring journey. Self determination lacks that necessary spiritual component, God.

According to me, all of us somewhere on our journey are touched by the grace of God who is and has ever been with us, within us. It is that touch, not even known by us, that sets our feet, our heart and our head all going in the same direction, and we hold our nose and take a leap of faith...out there into the unknown, in trust and gut-bucket fear.

It is there we find our own star...and know it as yours, too...and hers and his and theirs. We are Oned!

Thank you.

AND GOD JUST GRINS

To quote my beloved "God Calling," It is not life and its difficulties you have to conquer, only the self in you.

That line is all but unreadable in my book for my many different hi-lights and underlines. It pleases me that I had a mind-paralyzer just minutes before I sat down to read my dailies, and, just as I felt myself clutching...lo! there it was, my personal Peacemaker.

Again I realize if any fear thought should come true in my life, it would be for my ultimate good. I thank you, Lord, right  this red-hot minute for having my back...more to the point, for having my mind. (It takes side trips all on its own ever so often...you know it, and I know it.) So I thank you, My Heart, for walking me 24/7, trudging along with me on your leash, me sniffing every single want-to and what-if I find...you just grinning at my self-will.

God loves me sooo much. You, too...God's got no favorites. Or maybe it's that we're all God's favorites!

Thank you.

GOD'S HAND IS IN IT...ALL IS WELL

Here's my take on the good news/bad news of daily living: If something happens that is so wonderful that it takes my breath when I even think on it, then I know God's hand is in it. If something happens that is so horrific that it takes my breath when I even think on it, then I know God's hand is in it.

The political climate of the country today is so polarized by the self will of each of the millions of people certain sure in their own opinion that I rest knowing that God's hand is in it. To me, that is the nature of the glory of God...there is no place he cannot be so never let go his hand.

We who are committed to living by spiritual principles have a choice: We can walk on, tearing up at the beauty of God's will which needs nothing from us but obedience, or laughing at the human will seeking constantly for more of its own...and getting it.

I've got God's hand firmly grasped...who's kidding whom? God's got my hand, yours, too...all is well.

Thank you.

P.S.  Speaking of tears of joy...today is Ruckus's 13th birthday. Oh Happy Day!

BY FORGIVING AND RELEASING

By grace and conversion, they realized that they could no longer project their inner violence outward, either creating victims or playing the victim themselves for their own empowerment. They see the only way to be victim in a generative and healing way is as Jesus did, by forgiving and releasing his crucifiers and himself. - Fr Richard Rohr, "Daily Meditation," December 26, 2016

I've been pondering the above Rohr quote since I first read it. I tend to believe the reason Jesus had to go all the way to crucifixion was that every time he "got over himself," he got no ego-victory bennies. only sneers and jeers for being a heretic or a wuss or, the worst, simply wrong. And here's the pearl beyond price: This, too, he fought not.

It was this nonresistance (a.k.a., acceptance, a.k.a., love) that lifted him to a higher plane, his highest plane being reached through crucifixion...and his return in toto to God consciousness.

The material world will never...can never...give seekers their spiritual gift. And, of course, the hard lesson we must needs learn is that any other gift, any other reward, is ego-driven, self contained, and keeps us on the material level...with cat scratch fever.

Thank you.

LIFE REALLY IS SIMPLE

Love seeks no cause  beyond itself and no fruit; it is its own fruit, its own enjoyment. I love because I love; I love in order that I may love.  -- Saint Bernard

To develop a healthy ego, * * * we must know we’re special and find a place where we are loved and where we belong without needing to prove ourselves. - Fr. Richard Rohr, "Daily Meditation," November 27, 2016

As I mentally toyed with Saint Bernard's quote, I remembered Rohr's healthy ego quote. And it was Bingo! night in my head. Love. To develop a healthy ego, love. To know we're special, love. Love outward and inward. Love inward and outward. Love.

In order to love, though, we must needs give up the game of exactly how do we love this? Or that? Or him, her, them? In order to love, practice loving...i.e., nonresistance.

That's been my inside-exercise for awhile now. I chose the most unlovable person in my own personal Book of Judgments on whom to practice loving. No. My self-judged "most unlovable person" chose me. Repeatedly. This is one who is less than enchanted with me...or did I need explain that?

So I've been practicing in secret...as in, I'm not giving her/him cards or compliments, little giftees or big grins...just being courteous, actually. The hard, and I am talking tough!, part is mentally...thinking kind thoughts, projecting loving kindness toward a pickle-pain is no easy matter.

It's a good thing I'm welcome in God's world because I'm there a lot with this one. The good, jump-up-and-shout good news is I don't feel particularly hard toward him...I have softer edges in my mind when I think of her, and my heart doesn't burp acid either.

The LOL realization why this is so difficult for me is that I'm not allowed to say anything...to explain, to sway her opinion, his thoughts.

Everything...meaning life...really is simple. It's when we ponder it, think on it, analyze it (and who ever pondered without analyzing?) that life seems difficult to our mind's eye.  It's when we forget who is really in charge of life itself that we find our self seeking help from that very one.

And God just laughs....

Thank you.

HAPPILY WHOLE

We read and hear how personal relationships are the best...and roughest!...path to walk when seeking spiritual growth. The reason it is the roughest way, of course, is that its singular demand is that we change our mind. That we change our ego-centric mind for an other-centered mind.

When I started on this road seeking still more spiritual growth, I missed completely the part about do unto others. By missed, I mean I read it, I liked it, I just didn't know spiritual growth was about actually doing it...that I was supposed to do unto others as I would have them do unto me. The majority of the time yet!

Even wanting, with a sincere heart and clear mind, to be more concerned for a friend's needs then we are for our own wants does not ensure we will cede our will every time. And then, if we're really seeking spiritual growth, at some point we will stumble across the clue that we're supposed to love our enemy as much as we love our self...or our dog even!

Hard ain't it hard, oh Lord, serving you.

We finally get the paradox: It is impossible to be more concerned for another than we are for our self when we're determined to do it. Our very determination derails us for that determination is all for the glory of self.

There. We get a grip, and in fairly short order learn we must loose that grip and let God. Then and only then can we accept humility as our hard-won prize...won through complete defeat of self. And we are made whole.

Thank you.

THE PROPER USE OF THE REASONING MIND

[The following is a reworked reprint of my blog of June 21, 2013.]

The reasoning mind is God's tool. As long as we're wrestling within the reasoning mind (worrying, nattering, regretting, obsessing, etc.), we are into God's business. He allows us there...that is our free will, his gift to us.

We must always remember, however, that while he is allowing us to roam free mentally, physically, spiritually, we are on our own...we have shut God out.

The proper use of the reasoning mind is to regift it...give it back to God. All that requires is to make a decision to turn our will and our life over to the care of God...that's it.

The rest of our life is the carrying out of that decision. All of our zigs and zags, stumbles and falls, slips of the tongue and the mind are us, going in the right direction. We're bringing it all back home...to God.

It is when we get stuck in shame and blame for our slips of tongue and mind that we've landed back in our ego-driven mind, and we already know there is no God there.

Again, we pray our "Thank You" for the reminder (which is as painful as it needs to be), then we recall our decision...now we move on up.

Thank you.

ACCEPTANCE, NONRESISTANCE, LOVE

Joy is the result of faithful trusting acceptance of My Will when It seems not joyous. * * * Expect rebuffs until this is learned -- it is the only way. - "God Calling," January 8

There it is, the reason why that little book, "God Calling," has been so important to me for so long...and will continue to be, please and thank you. It boils down all the fancy-schmancy spiritually high-consciousness baloney that flows so freely from me to me...boils it down and puts the period to it. 

I suspect that entry is where I first got the  realization that acceptance when it seems not acceptable is to be headed in the right direction...away from self-determined objectives, seeking God's.

The hard lesson learning is that nothing anyone says to or about us can cause us lasting pain if we don't pick it up...for we end up wrapping our ego in it, virtually wearing it like it is finest silk for all our world to see. It is not what others say that brings us pain...it is how we respond that is the source of our misery.

That is essentially why we must learn that love is the answer no matter the question...ergo, love must come in many different guises, masks and meanings. One that I like today is nonresistance.

It is possible to hear...with our own ears, hear...ugly said about us and not respond with ugly. We cannot, however, do that relying on self will alone. Self will, driven by ego, is incapable of nonresistance, i.e., love. The job of self will, obviously, is to legislate for self...even when trying to show forth love, self concern will come first and ruin the play.

Acceptance, nonresistance, love...all are of God, none are available to self will all on its own.

Joy is the result of faithful trusting acceptance of My Will when It seems not joyous.

Thank you.

CLARIFIED FEELINGS...AND GRACE

Blinding flash of the obvious at bedtime last night: My block with my sister is not that I can't forgive her. It  is that I am embarrassed that I could love her and speak to others of loving her when she has been and continues to be so rude, disrespectful and hateful to me. Others would think I was nuts to accept her...admit to loving her no less...when they have heard of her many mean and hurtful remarks and actions.

Some BFOs are more welcome than others. This one is an "Oh, rats!"

That last part of the last line is the teller of the tale: "...when they have heard of her many mean and hurtful remarks and actions."

None of my friends have ever met my sister in the walking-around flesh, sooo...who has told them of her "many mean and hurtful remarks and actions?"

That would be me.

This after I've preached many a sermon ("shared") about the danger of slinging mud at others for it will invariably find its way home to our own face.

Well, turning my rats into raves, I do feel a new peace in my heart toward my sister. I can love her without that nagging mental question, "What is wrong with me?," rolling around in my head. The best part is I know that just because I've realized I can love my sister freely does not mean that she now loves me equally. I have no reason to believe that her feelings have changed, and mine haven't changed...mine have just been clarified. Hey, that's close enough to perfect for me.

Thank you.

LIFE IS A SPIRITUAL MATTER

Jesus was consistently empowering others. -- Fr. Richard Rohr in his "Daily Meditation" of January 6, 2017.

There it is. That's the giving-over that I'm forever nattering about. Not the giving-over of agreeing just to shut the other person up, or agreeing out of fear of getting beat up...no. The giving-over to empower others...to find agreement by not fighting, not arguing, not even disagreeing a tish. To get our ah-ha moment from the other and to give the other their ah-ha moment right back!

I'm fairly certain that this cannot be done on our willpower alone...the giving-over act is too selfless. Willpower is not.

It must needs start with our willingness, though. Which, may I say, takes all the willpower we've got just to get willing to try giving over. But, you know what? That's what God is for.

We can sit in the silence and admire, or profess admiration, till our face falls off, until we put him to use, where are we but sitting, professing and eyeing the clock? We put him to use by mentally getting off our duff and beginning!

This is when the art of listening for the still, small voice becomes our goal...where the inner action begins. That's what is going to make our decision for us...the one where we hear the Word and need question no more. The Word is usually just a thought or two and an encyclopedia of meaning fills our head and heart.

We know, suddenly, how to give over without leaving claw marks all over it. Our brain power does not reach that far, but our brain power left to God reaches all the way to Heaven and back if needed.

SIDEBAR:  Earlier this morning, after a full yesterday of fretting, stewing and feeling superior (Gertrude was not doing it right), I had an epiphany, and I knew exactly what to do and how to do it. No need to go into great detail because the short version is: Give over...by empowering her.

God loves Gertrude and me so much.

Thank you.

FREE...AIN'T NOTHING BETTER THAN FREE

My morning blinding flash of the obvious: Death does not equal being left alone. Death is the great gatherer of peoples. Death brings all together. There is no left alone in the next dimension...for that matter, there is no left alone in this dimension except we fear it so.

There. Old fear of mine, being left alone by death or by damned...didn't God make short work of it?

This BFO is my proof again that God does know my needs. Knows them and tends to them when I least expect it, i.e., when I'm not nattering him about what he needs to do about me.

From now I must needs hold to this because it is a fact in my life that a fear that old may be by now no more than a bad habit, but it is entrenched. God and I both working together have our work cut out for us then.

I'm a lot like my beloved fictional dog Chet who once said, " ...a lesson I learned the hard way once, and after that the hard way again." I love Chet.

It may be colder than cold out there, snow may be on the way, we may even have an ice storm coming...bring it on! I'm free at last, thank God Almighty, I'm free at last!

Thank you.

GOD IS NOT EXTERNAL

God is not external to anyone, but is present with all things, though they are ignorant that he is so. -- Plotinus

I had to Google Plotinus just now and found that Plotinus was a major Greek-speaking philosopher of the ancient world.

Here's a "Greek-speaking philosopher of the ancient world" speaking words of truth that are keeping way too many of us in doubt this very day. And even those who aren't in doubt are still living fairly "ignorant that he is so." I know this to be true because few of us rarely if ever actually rely on the presence of God in our life.

I am convinced that this is the cross we bear...self determined objectives, our ego, Lucy, self-centered fear, self-centered... period. Fortunately, I no longer expect myself or others to live absolutely free of self, but who's kidding whom? That must be our aim or when will we ever begin?

Doubt we will, aim higher we must. In order to do that, to aim higher, I wonder if it isn't that we must become willing to use our cross as a stepladder. Don't curse it, use it. 

I do know, and I do know from experience, that when I aim higher, God lifts me up...up being over my self.

God is so good to me. And you.

Thank you.

IT DOESN'T MAKE REASONING MIND SENSE

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear -- not absence of fear. -- Mark Twain

Now here's a hard one to grasp: Resistance to fear is not fighting fear, it is welcoming fear.

Our experience has taught us that fighting fear just nurtures it for we are entirely focused on our fear...on trying to rid our self of the object of our fear.

Here comes paradox to save the day! For to resist fear we only need welcome fear is a paradox. The difficulty being that paradox does not make reasoning mind sense...its stand must needs be in God's world: We welcome fear by inviting God to participate, then we follow his lead.

We go back to our entire focus being on the object of our fear, and there it is. That's the key to welcoming fear...we search our soul for the object that is causing us pause. Fear of bankruptcy? Fear of going to our grave unloved? Fear of going to our grave?

There is always an object of our fear, and the solution is the same-old-same-old...hug it and kiss it and let it go. Interestingly, the same-old-same-old can't be done all on our lonesome either...we must turn again to God.

The great stand-up-and-shout news is we have long since made our decision to turn our self over to God...so all it takes to "turn again to God" is quicker, easier, better than texting our best friend, "Help!" God's here, God is always here, help is at hand, use it, you can't abuse it!

There is a whole new world awaiting for those who cease fighting everything and everybody.

Thank you.

BECOME WILLING...FORGIVENESS WILL FOLLOW

My morning's blinding flash of the obvious -- I will never "hear" the Lord...I can only show forth what the Lord says to me by my actions of forgiveness, love, laughter.

The word "forgiveness" is my toughie. I don't like that word. My dislike reminds me of my reaction to the word "discipline." P-euwww. And then there's "obedience." Eeeek! Geez, I'm giving me heartburn here.

I'm reminded of a line from one of my favorite songs, "Looking back and longing for the freedom of my chains." For that's what I'm doing when I reject those very words, longing for the freedom of my ego-linked chains, my self-determined wants...where there is no God to lead me toward peace, love and joy.

I was listening really hard to hear God's word this morning when I had my BFO. I'll give him this...he knows how to cut through my baloney. I could stay stuck for who cares how long "trying really hard to hear God's word," never for an instant thinking of my sister for whom I need to seek in my soul for forgiveness. I know, and I know I know, the only thing standing between me and a loving heart toward my sister is my willingness to forgive her. Period. Plain and simple. And I even want to.

I'm guessing that's the difference between want to and willing to...want to is of the material mind, need to is of God. We may or may not get our wants met, but our needs will without fail be met...by God and God alone in his way, on his timetable, and often (and seemingly) for the benefit of the other.

Only forgiveness can free us from the bondage of self. The fact is I've never fully accepted the reality that I need to forgive her. I need to not just for my own heart's sake but equally for her own heart's sake, too. Forgiveness frees us all, not by our trying to detach from any specific wrong, hurt or harm...but by our not even thinking of those.

Forgiveness comes by our thinking only of God, the grace of God, the glory of God, gratitude for the grace of God...God.

Thank you.

SEARCH...SEEK...ASK!

I am here on this earth for the single purpose of being an outlet for God's fountain of Good. Which leads to my question: How? -- my blog of December 28, 2016

Most Christians have not been taught how to plug into the 'mind of Christ....' - Fr. Richard Rohr, "Daily Meditation," January 1, 2017

I love when I feel like I'm parading my ignorance, and I learn fairly quickly that it is not my ignorance, that I am not alone in this quandary also known as life, that it is mainly just the human condition.

I suspect the reason why many of us are unwilling "to parade our ignorance," is because we bought the theory that not knowing, just not knowing, is ignorance. Most important, we got to pick the person to blame for teaching us that. To accept the truth of the matter, that it was our ego...Lucy!...plain and simple that dictated our beliefs, would require us to change our own mind. In other words, to flat out take responsibility for our own thinking.

Our willingness to let our ego do our thinking for us was then and is now the source of all our woes, according to me.

 Unless and until we become willing to ask, often and more often, how to plug into the God of our own understanding, we will stand in the shadow of our own ego, cussing and crying, whining and whimpering. Our life away.

Choose you this day whom ye will serve. -- Joshua 24:15

Thank you.