One of my most personally leveling biblical quotes is Jesus's question to either Martha or Mary when one was carping to him about the other. He asked the carper, "What is that to you?"
Asking "What is that to me?" has saved me more times than anybody but me needs to know. The trouble is people think once someone gets old, they know more than they do. Having arrived at old, I get asked for advice a lot. Through hard-learned experience, I've gotten fairly good at giving generic answers or making listening noises and moving on.
I don't so much get up in my head randomly judging, but later, taken unawares, I can start mentally tweaking an answer to their question. I know to shut it down before it grows its own voice because it is amazing how right my ego can be and how completely it knows they need to hear it.
When I find myself mentally running another's life, I ask that question of me.
Here's a measure of how much I've grown: At one time, I'd ask that of me and get really defensive with myself...as if they had accused me of not minding my own business. Today, I ask that and it cracks me up...that I still need to ask it!
This may be why the song "Still Crazy After All These Years" is one of my favorites.
Thank you.
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